Pre Marriage Course

Hardy · February 06, 2016, 12:38:34 PM

My own memory, from long ago in a universe far far away, is of being there under severe duress and leaving after thirty minutes of the first of a scheduled five sessions, having confirmed my opinion that if you could learn anything from this bullshite you were not equipped to be married anyway. I remember the straw that mutilated this camel's vertebrae - "life is a lot like a cake..."

rrhf · February 06, 2016, 01:06:53 PM

Quote from: Hardy on February 06, 2016, 12:38:34 PM
My own memory, from long ago in a universe far far away, is of being there under severe duress and leaving after thirty minutes of the first of a scheduled five sessions, having confirmed my opinion that if you could learn anything from this bullshite you were not equipped to be married anyway. I remember the straw that mutilated this camel's vertebrae - "life is a lot like a cake..."

run forrest run!

No wides · February 06, 2016, 01:08:56 PM

Quote from: Rois on February 06, 2016, 10:12:36 AM
Quote from: No wides on February 06, 2016, 09:05:45 AM
Quote from: Rois on February 05, 2016, 10:19:18 PM
3rd post...the OP was interested in hearing from people who'd done the course, as opposed to
people who know what they'd think if they had done it (but didn't).

I did it and have the exact same opinion of benny who didn't do it. Maybe the fact that your mother did your's is blinding you as to how bollix it all was.
Dear God man, my mother didn't take my pre marriage course! You might want to read posts properly before inferring that my opinion is clouded. It really detracts from any sort of argument you're trying to present.
The hysteria here about it is so out of proportion. The "holy joes" aren't bad people, they are volunteering their time for something they believe in and were likely asked to do. It's fine that posters didn't enjoy it or get anything from it. It didn't change my life either either, but it really isn't that bad.

OK maybe the fact that your mother was involved is blinding you from seeing how bollocks it was.

It is a complete and utter waste of anyone's time.

maggie · February 06, 2016, 04:27:49 PM

Did the course and thought it was grand. Was worried that it was gonna be circle time for adults but it was mostly spent chatting to your partner while going through the book. Taken by a man and woman who were both married 20 yrs plus though not to each other and they were very honest and lovely. No mass. Priest just popped in on the Saturday at the end to wish everyone well in their married life. Quite a few of the couples there already had children/were living together so i think they said something like contraception is up to yourselves-no lectures about what to do.

Now 2 years on and have to do one before the baby gets Christened. Not sure what it involves though?

imtommygunn · February 07, 2016, 09:02:23 AM

No wides 1 catholic church 0

No wides · February 07, 2016, 02:55:08 PM

Quote from: maggie on February 06, 2016, 04:27:49 PM
Did the course and thought it was grand. Was worried that it was gonna be circle time for adults but it was mostly spent chatting to your partner while going through the book. Taken by a man and woman who were both married 20 yrs plus though not to each other and they were very honest and lovely. No mass. Priest just popped in on the Saturday at the end to wish everyone well in their married life. Quite a few of the couples there already had children/were living together so i think they said something like contraception is up to yourselves-no lectures about what to do.

Now 2 years on and have to do one before the baby gets Christened. Not sure what it involves though?

Was at my nieces christening last night, some married man from Portadown took it, a deacon or something, my brother and his wife went to this, a slide show about the sacrament with 4 holy rollers and said deacon, they were asked to explain why they choose the babies name, ffs its going be like confirmation now you need a saints name and a three page essay to choose your childs name. All in all sounded like another load of balls.

Milltown Row2 · February 07, 2016, 02:56:21 PM

I wonder what the success rate is, how many have taken the course and are still married

No wides · February 07, 2016, 05:56:29 PM

So you stopped being a nosey p***k when you weren't getting the answers you wanted.

No wides · February 07, 2016, 06:07:40 PM

Quote from: Milltown Row2 on February 07, 2016, 02:56:21 PM
I wonder what the success rate is, how many have taken the course and are still married

Why would it matter, it's house rules to do it!!!!

Olly · February 07, 2016, 06:17:01 PM

I did mine in a place called Dungannon (I kid you nat, tho the locals say "dun" then "gannon" and not "dung" and '"annon")

There were 4 couples, one of the couples were in their 70s. To cut a long story short, the priest talked so much about sex that things started getting hot and heavy and before long the whole lot of us were stripped off and ridin all around the room. It was worthwhile because we found out so much about ourselves. I didn't know my partner was into 70-year old men and I found myself partial to the same sex. The sea of bare arses will never leave me and the priest watchin it and shakin his head and then he started singin ne'er my god to thee in on the ukulele and people buckin like mad all over the room and him crying. There were sandwiches and tea after.

grounded · February 07, 2016, 10:41:07 PM

I'm getting married later in the year and we're attending a pre-wedding course which is being ran by accord. It's ran over Friday evening and Saturday.

What can I expect at this? I understand the topics are co-ordinated by lay-people.

The accord course I attended was a Friday evening and Saturday morning(about 4 years ago). There were two lay-people(one was a German lady and one a local councillor) running the course. TBH, I was sort of dreading the whole thing. I was expecting a whole load of embarrassing questions and a bit of a borefest. It wasn't that bad and looking back on it(shock horror) there were a few useful things gained from the experience.
The course is arranged in a folder with a number of topics to be covered(spread over the 2 sessions). The whole thing was very laid back and there weren't any really awkward moments and the lay-people weren't lecturing us. More often than not a topic was raised and you and your partner discussed it between yourselves. Sometimes people were arranged in groups to discuss something. My understanding is that it is up to the priest marrying you as to whether the course is needed or not. The main annoyance for people seems to be the cost and I suppose this should be looked at if it is a barrier to people taking the course(a good idea would be to let people voluntarily donate).
Looking back on it I can see the rationale for it. It's a very important sacrament in the Catholic Church and I can see the logic in running a course that might help people understand what they are going to undertake(even if it did feel stupid/awkward at the time.

Never beat the deeler · February 08, 2016, 06:32:24 AM

Quote from: grounded on February 07, 2016, 10:41:07 PM
I'm getting married later in the year and we're attending a pre-wedding course which is being ran by accord. It's ran over Friday evening and Saturday.

What can I expect at this? I understand the topics are co-ordinated by lay-people.

The accord course I attended was a Friday evening and Saturday morning(about 4 years ago). There were two lay-people(one was a German lady and one a local councillor) running the course. TBH, I was sort of dreading the whole thing. I was expecting a whole load of embarrassing questions and a bit of a borefest. It wasn't that bad and looking back on it(shock horror) there were a few useful things gained from the experience.
The course is arranged in a folder with a number of topics to be covered(spread over the 2 sessions). The whole thing was very laid back and there weren't any really awkward moments and the lay-people weren't lecturing us. More often than not a topic was raised and you and your partner discussed it between yourselves. Sometimes people were arranged in groups to discuss something. My understanding is that it is up to the priest marrying you as to whether the course is needed or not. The main annoyance for people seems to be the cost and I suppose this should be looked at if it is a barrier to people taking the course(a good idea would be to let people voluntarily donate).
Looking back on it I can see the rationale for it. It's a very important sacrament in the Catholic Church and I can see the logic in running a course that might help people understand what they are going to undertake(even if it did feel stupid/awkward at the time.

away out of here you with your 'answering questions', your 'sticking to the topic' and your 'reasonableness'

Go on, shoo!

gallsman · February 08, 2016, 08:28:01 AM

Out of curiosity, how much do these things cost?!

WeeDonns · February 08, 2016, 09:11:23 AM

Quote from: gallsman on February 08, 2016, 08:28:01 AM
Out of curiosity, how much do these things cost?!

£125. Booked ours last night

finbar o tool · February 08, 2016, 10:58:59 AM

Quote from: WeeDonns on February 08, 2016, 09:11:23 AM
Quote from: gallsman on February 08, 2016, 08:28:01 AM
Out of curiosity, how much do these things cost?!
£125. Booked ours last night

wow....
i hope this thing is optional, wouldn't that solve everything, anyone who wants to do it or believes it will help can do it, anyone who doesn't want to do it doesn't have to.
sounds pretty outdated to me considering the majority of people getting married have already been living together for years and a fair few would have kids already....
i certainly wont be handing over that kind of money to someone else to tell me how to be a husband!!