Messages

[spending ridiculous amounts of money for show and to keep up with the Jones.]

Why should i have to give a bigger present because couples want a fancy meal that they can tell everyone about

Good, you're getting the point at last.

Coming around to the english way of thinking 

Dont see much wrong with the english way on thinking on weddings.

Nothing wrong with it that is in their culture and is the way they do things.

I dont think Irish culture was ever about spending ridiculous amounts of money for show and to keep up with the Jones.  Is it any wonder the 26 counties is in the state it is?

Are you saying everyone does that on weddings ?

Why should i have to give a bigger present because couples want a fancy meal that they can tell everyone about

Good, you're getting the point at last.

Coming around to the english way of thinking 

Dont see much wrong with the english way on thinking on weddings.

Nothing wrong with it that is in their culture and is the way they do things.

Why should i have to give a bigger present because couples want a fancy meal that they can tell everyone about

Good, you're getting the point at last.

Coming around to the english way of thinking 

[And I think most people will agree that most couples won't want to go for the "basic" package on their big day]

ok calm down everyone, £50 is fine. End of matter. I will accept that although it is not my opinion. I am starting to sound like I am on a six-figure salary now  people get so hot under the collar on a subject which should not be deemed as so touchy

take a look at ANY recognised hotel venue in any part of Ireland and see the average cost per meal, thats all I am saying, I feel the moral obligation to at least cover the cost of the feed, anything after that is up to the couple themselves... I just think pintsofguinness has a major gripe on "paying for someone else's wedding" simple as that and that the invitation is seen as a summons

cavan4ever is right, the english are notorious for giving crap wedding presents... I lived there

The average cost of a meal is probably about £35

example:
http://www.canalcourthotel.com/weddings.jsp?c=/Weddings/menus.jsp - the wedding menu starts from £28.90, plus £5 - £10 for the evening buffet

thats one, here are 4 more

http://www.loughernegolfresort.com/ENG/static_files/files/wedding_packages_22_04_09.pdf - £56-£80 per meal

http://www.manor-house-hotel.com/UpLoads/Documents/WEDDING%20PACKAGE%202009.pdf - can't be arsed reading it all but somewhere around £50-£60 per meal looks about right

http://www.ballymascanlon.com/html/weddingmenu.htm - €50+ for meal, not inc. the extras

http://www.galgorm.com/filestore/documents/Wedding_Menu%5C%27s_2010.pdf - £37-£100 for food only.

And I think most people will agree that most couples won't want to go for the "basic" package on their big day

Why should i have to give a bigger present because couples want a fancy meal that they can tell everyone about 

[€250 if it had a free bar...]

Billy,

Thanks, We had thought of that, well I did but I'm glad I went down the road we did as my parents have never had a wedding at home (USA and England) and the wife's family the same (Scotland and Cyprus)  but we've been living together 10 years and could afford it although if I hadn't been getting married there is no way we'd have 25K if you know what I mean.

Hardy,

Thanks as well, yea the price of flowers for the church shocked me as well but some people spend over 2k on that alone, or 600 euro on a cake, 500 on invitations etc but I married a chartered accountant and she was very conscious of cost so much she is now getting ready to sell her dress.

The cost broke down very roughly

Music, reception, alcohol 12K

Accommodation 2k (We were there for a week before hand)

Honeymoon and wedding rings 5k

Dresses, suits, priest, church, weeding fees, photographer 6K

Even the price of a photographer would break your heart, average 1500 to 2000 euro, ours was a lot less but you have to negotiate on everything, we reckon we cut the costs by 20% because we haggled on everything, if they wouldn't budge on price we just went somewhere else, in fact the bride located her dress 15% cheaper in Galway and got the local lady she was dealing with to reduce her price to that or else she'd just buy it in Galway.

It can be a rip-off but at 25K I think we did very well for the day we had but I would think that 

Congrats Dinny. Getting the chop myself after Christmas and are going down a similar route of haggling. The church will have their Christmas flowers still up so that is one cost saved thank fcuk. Getting a mate to take photographs and will be looking to others for lifts to the church, etc. Can't believe I'll still be looking at 25K though...

Gerry if I was you I'd get back onto the blower to your man and say you are going to write about your experiences with him on every wedding discussion forum out there unless he sends you on the photos.

Rois, if she's that good a friend she'll be only too happy to let you off. Was in Mullingar for a league game the day after the sisters wedding last year (although I didn't have half the country to cover to get back for the session the night after).

Want to do something different to "favours" and buying a round after the meal, thinking of a shot of sambouca or something similar to help digestion, any other suggestions??? Have the fecking pre marriage course tonight, hitting the drink shortly...

Back to the topic heading, would usually give €200 for a couple, €250 if it had a free bar...

It's not a free bar then if you are paying for it 

I'm fully behind Pints etc. on this - guests at a wedding should not have to pay the bills for hosting the wedding. If the groom decides he wants to arrive in a helicopter (it happens!) then don't be expecting me to foot the bill.

As for someone comparing the Irish and English - it's extremely Irish to invite as many people as possible to wedding so you can tell everyone how big your wedding was, rather than inviting people you really want to be there. That's sad.

It's also sad that some people think that people only get married because others are paying for it .

[sussed]

its all relative..what exactly constitutes a crap wedding present then.
i cant believe that some people would consider not inviting someone to a wedding cuz there present isnt up to their standards, and even worse they have them sussed out beforehand..bunch of judgemental farquars on here.

I don't see where anyone is suggesting that 

In fairness i did.

Surely no-one actually believed you

He must have.

Anyway here is what most people seem to be giving down here €150-€200 for a friend and then what ever for a family member.

[sussed]

its all relative..what exactly constitutes a crap wedding present then.
i cant believe that some people would consider not inviting someone to a wedding cuz there present isnt up to their standards, and even worse they have them sussed out beforehand..bunch of judgemental farquars on here.

I don't see where anyone is suggesting that 

In fairness i did.

[A mate told me to do it]

The pisstake is too obvious now cavan, nice try though.

aw well

A mate told me to do it, he reckons it was the best thing he could have done.  His uncle didnt give a present and him and his father went to the house and dropped hints till he was shamed into putting the hand in the pocket.

what are you, 16 yrs old?
[/quote]

U never get advise of someone Brick.

[sussed]

its all relative..what exactly constitutes a crap wedding present then.
i cant believe that some people would consider not inviting someone to a wedding cuz there present isnt up to their standards, and even worse they have them sussed out beforehand..bunch of judgemental farquars on here.

Yep thats absolutely ridiculous, to be sussing out who gives what and then deciding not to invite them based on that. What a load of shyte

A mate told me to do it, he reckons it was the best thing he could have done.  His uncle didnt give a present and him and his father went to the house and dropped hints till he was shamed into putting the hand in the pocket.

[As for that last comment u made i presume ur taking the piss, if ur not u need knocked out]

Some big shots around this board today 

yes but I'm with Billy, a shock is on the way, I'm surprised it hasnt hit them already. 

I just think pintsofguinness has a major gripe on "paying for someone else's wedding" simple as that and that the invitation is seen as a summons

Id rather receive a summons than an invitation, especially when it takes me five minutes to think of who the invitation is from and how they know me and then it dawns on me I haven't seen them since school ffs.  But no, I'd say they're inviting me for my company!

For instance, Pints is sitting at a wedding thinking of how much it cost him and of the holiday he could be on. If thats his attitude I don't think he should have went as he isn't doing himself any favours and is been two faced to the bride and groom.

I generally only go to family weddings and close friends, I ignore the rest of the invitations.

Crap wedding presents and wat the feck is crap about £100???  Duno about u but £100 is plenty to me at the minute with the amount of other things i have on!!

As for that last comment u made i presume ur taking the piss, if ur not u need knocked out

Need a deposit for a house dont want any wasters who give nothing going.

Have a small private wedding then and what you save would probably cover a deposit.

Thats boring

[As for that last comment u made i presume ur taking the piss, if ur not u need knocked out]

Crap wedding presents and wat the feck is crap about £100???  Duno about u but £100 is plenty to me at the minute with the amount of other things i have on!!

As for that last comment u made i presume ur taking the piss, if ur not u need knocked out

Need a deposit for a house dont want any wasters who give nothing going.

I could just imagine my mate giving me £20 as a present 

A bowl of soup would do that f**ker 

so what if they are more english than irish...why is it an english/irish thing now..
are you saying ye wont be inviting them cuz of the standard or lack of it of their present.

Exaclty cos there the ones who just stand at the bar all night complaining.

[How do we have the same attitude as the english??]

How do we have the same attitude as the english??

Just because we feel £100 per couple isnt miserable. Catch yourself on

Its more english than irish to give crap wedding presents.


Well i wont be asking people that give crap presents or nothing atall i have already sussed that out from other friends realations etc.

You lot have the same attuitde as the English.

Stick £20 in a card.