Suicide - why can't we just name it?

[glens abu]

Was at discussion one night on suicide and aMother of a child who had taken his own life got very annoyed with the term"committed suicide ".have been very careful not to use it since.

Attended a suicide awareness seminar recently by pips newry and mourne and they stressed that we should not use the term 'committed' in this context as it relates back to a time when suicide was illegal in the eyes of the law.

Not trying to be awkward, but how else would you say it - carried out suicide? killed himself?

taken his or her own life.

[Shamrock Shore]

My wife had a big row with her 'old school' mother who claimed that if a death is described as "sudden" in the death notices in the papers then it was surely suicide if one didn't hear of a car accident or some other type accident.

I too was astonished by this view head by mid-70s rural Irish mammies.

[Hardy]

Not trying to deflect from the subject matter but i remember a time when someone died of cancer that "cancer" wouldn't be said. Like there was some sort of shame in it. Anyone else get this ?

Definitely so in the past and even surviving to some extent among older people, I think. My father died of cancer when I was thirteen and we never heard the word cancer mentioned in the context of his illness. I'm not even sure whether my mother didn't know it was cancer herself or participated in hiding the reality. We (kids and, as far as I understand, neighbours) were told he had jaundice which affected his liver and that was what he was dying from. It was cancer of the colon, which I didn't find out until I was in my early twenties and saw his death certificate.

[SLIGONIAN]

My THoughts are i can see where Eamonn is coming from and he has strong point. But tbh having experienced the devastation of a close friend committing suicide recently and that pain isnt close to what his family is going through, i would allow them make the call on what to say how there son died tbh if it helps them cope easier then let them call it a sudden death.

[charlieTully]

Was at discussion one night on suicide and aMother of a child who had taken his own life got very annoyed with the term"committed suicide ".have been very careful not to use it since.

Attended a suicide awareness seminar recently by pips newry and mourne and they stressed that we should not use the term 'committed' in this context as it relates back to a time when suicide was illegal in the eyes of the law.

Not trying to be awkward, but how else would you say it - carried out suicide? killed himself?

taken his or her own life.

healthcare professionals now refer to it as completed suicide.

[muppet]

This might sound funny but we seem to be more likely to watch the funeral of some famous person we never met, in preference to attending a funeral of a person who lived nearby or we knew, but we 'only' met <insert number> of times.

Meh, speak for your self. I've never sat down and watched a funeral on the telly.

'Watch' doesn't just refer to the telly.

Think of the thousands lining the streets for a famous person that many of them never met.

[trileacman]

This might sound funny but we seem to be more likely to watch the funeral of some famous person we never met, in preference to attending a funeral of a person who lived nearby or we knew, but we 'only' met <insert number> of times.

Meh, speak for your self. I've never sat down and watched a funeral on the telly.

'Watch' doesn't just refer to the telly.

Think of the thousands lining the streets for a famous person that many of them never met.

They mightn't have met them but they "knew" of them and perhaps wanted to pay their respects? I'd say a fair few ones out there knew the life of the deceased and what they stood for alot better than "yer man up the road" when he was buried.

[muppet]

This might sound funny but we seem to be more likely to watch the funeral of some famous person we never met, in preference to attending a funeral of a person who lived nearby or we knew, but we 'only' met <insert number> of times.

Meh, speak for your self. I've never sat down and watched a funeral on the telly.

'Watch' doesn't just refer to the telly.

Think of the thousands lining the streets for a famous person that many of them never met.

They mightn't have met them but they "knew" of them and perhaps wanted to pay their respects? I'd say a fair few ones out there knew the life of the deceased and what they stood for alot better than "yer man up the road" when he was buried.

There are celebrities who don't seem to stand for anything who have thousands mourn them. We are probably talking about different things.

[trileacman]

This might sound funny but we seem to be more likely to watch the funeral of some famous person we never met, in preference to attending a funeral of a person who lived nearby or we knew, but we 'only' met <insert number> of times.

Meh, speak for your self. I've never sat down and watched a funeral on the telly.

'Watch' doesn't just refer to the telly.

Think of the thousands lining the streets for a famous person that many of them never met.

[Minder]

I saw an article in the Irish News today that a young fella (16) from North Belfast had committed suicide.

Maybe it's just me but I thought it was an unwritten rule that journalists don't mention that it was suicide, or wouldn't even report on it ?

[charlieTully]

I saw an article in the Irish News today that a young fella (16) from North Belfast had committed suicide.

Maybe it's just me but I thought it was an unwritten rule that journalists don't mention that it was suicide, or wouldn't even report on it ?

Please don't refer to someone taking their own life as committing suicide. The story was in the paper in the obvious hope that young people or their parents read it and notice any signs and take the appropriate action, it always a very risky time for young ones when there friends or relatives complete suicide.

[Main Street]

There was a lengthy and very informative  article in the Mosaic magazine recently about the rise in deaths by suicide  in NI.
Suicide of the Ceasefire Babies

Also examines  a phenomenon known as 'intergenerational transmission of trauma'. how traumas are passed down though the generations.

[brokencrossbar1]

I suppose died by suicide is the term that should be used. This young lad was in school with my lad, the year below him, and his next door neighbour sits beside my daughter in school. I didn't read the article so I'm not sure if it went into detail of what may have been the triggers behind it but this lad had an awful lot going on that had a massive negative impact on his life. Suicide is something that was always there but I'm not quite sure if the language used is the reason that it is more prevalent. It wasn't called suicide for years for many different reasons, shame, religion, insurance, but there is a more negative perception to the word. The problem in my view is not the language that surrounds the final act but the absolute horrendous lack of support beforehand. There was another death by suicide this week that I know of the person involved. It was his 2nd or 3rd attempt. The tragedy is not just that it happened but that it could have been prevented. I don't know the whole details of the individuals background and possible engagement but I do know from personal experience that the mental health profession is under so much pressure that a lot of people don't just fall through the cracks but are forced through them.

[longballin]

Some families feel a sort of shame when a relative takes their own life. Is nothing to feel ashamed about as the person was ill... same time is best not splash it around the papers to add to their pain unless family wants to come out and say the cause... IMO

[Truth hurts]

it is scary the amount of suicide happening recently... scary and so sad