Election 2011 Offical Thread.

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

Anyone any controversial policies I could include. T

You could stand on a platform of midland water for midland people, i.e. let the Dublin councils keep their grubby little hands of Longford's Shannon water.
You could also simultaneously run on the grounds of midland flood relief.

[Billys Boots]

Billy - I'll put you in charge of the Poolbeg Incinerator project where you can deal with Gormley, the soon-to-be-ex TD.

Baby, I can light that fire!

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

Instead of happy hours in pubs, have unhappy hours i.e. one hour at full prices and the rest of the day at ridiculous prices to encourage footfall and get the ailing pub industry up and running

Happy Hour is already illegal in the Republic, as is ladies night. The first was thought to encourage binge drinking, the latter was interpreted as sexual discrimination against men (take that ya hairy lesbian feminists).

[Shamrock Shore]

Actually we're off track here as my seat will be in Dun Laoghaire - not Longford/Westmeath.

So local issues here only.

[muppet]

Anyone any controversial policies I could include.

* establish a tribunal to investigate if tribunals are a waste of time and money;
* single parent allowance to be scrapped and replaced by a two parent allowance;
* free housing to be replaced by not free housing;
* TDs annual pensions to be €1 for every first preference vote they received in their final GE;
* Minister and Taoiseach to receive 1.5 times the above;
* Introduction of rollerblade lanes alongside bicycle lanes.;
* Dáil to have three citizens sitting at desks each with big red 'X'. If two of the citizens press their 'X' during a speech the speaker is then removed from the Dáil for 24 hours first offense, 1 week second offense and will resign after a third offense.
* The above citizens will be chosen by a weekly lotto.
* Every year there will be a vote to banish one Irish citizen from the State. There will be a National Holiday introduced to announce the person being banished which will include a day of celebration. Nominations for the vote are open to anyone but must include Mary Harney every year until she wins one.

[Banana Man]

i still think we should invade the isle of man

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

Invade the isle of man and keep as tax free haven for foreign investors with the Manx paying crazy tax to the Dail

Leading to making Standard-English, Connacht-Irish, Ulster-Irish, Munster-Irish, North-Mayo-Irish, Manx, Cant, Shelta, Ullans, Hiberno-English, Norse, Yola, Mid-Ulster English, Scots-Gaelic, Old-French, Welsh, Flemish, Palatine-German, Republican-French, Norman-French, Norse-Gaelic, Spanish, Frisian, Anglo-Saxon, Latin, Cornish, Pictish, Yiddish and a few other English variates to be made compulsory on the Leaving Cert and made national languages.

With calls to include Polish, Arabic, Lithuanian, Russian, Cantonese, Mandarin, Portuguese, Mexican-Spanish, various traditional Afircan languages, Stran, Hindi, Magyar, Romance, Roma, and of course Deustch among others to be included.

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

Actually we're off track here as my seat will be in Dun Laoghaire - not Longford/Westmeath.

So local issues here only.

Nordie delousing policy!!! 

People who throw stones at cars on the moterway will be stoned themselves.

Annex the Boyne valley.

Annex Carlingford.

Hide the roadsigns to Newry.

Have Sellafield moved to Pembrokeshire.

[Hardy]

Hardy (honourary Larry) - a role in Dept of Foreign Affairs with special responsibility for Northern Ireland affairs.

My first act will be to donate Louth to the North.

[Nally Stand]

PSTG to be given a permanent position as Irish Ambassador to the Antartic

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

PSTG to be given a permanent position as Irish Ambassador to the Antartic

PSTG & Diplomacy   

[Shamrock Shore]

My first act will be to donate Louth to the North

Jazes Hardy - could we not try and get a few bob for it?

I mean surely half a nice bridge, Oriel Park and the all weather racing track, plus the fabulous Cooley penisula as well as eh, some of dem chippers in Dundalk late on a Friday night must be worth something.

Oliver Plunkett's head is probably worth a few grand

[armaghniac]

    Invade the isle of man and keep as tax free haven for foreign investors with the Manx paying crazy tax to the Dail

Leading to making Standard-English, Connacht-Irish, Ulster-Irish, Munster-Irish, North-Mayo-Irish, Manx, Cant, Shelta, Ullans, Hiberno-English, Norse, Yola, Mid-Ulster English, Scots-Gaelic, Old-French, Welsh, Flemish, Palatine-German, Republican-French, Norman-French, Norse-Gaelic, Spanish, Frisian, Anglo-Saxon, Latin, Cornish, Pictish, Yiddish and a few other English variates to be made compulsory on the Leaving Cert and made national languages.

With calls to include Polish, Arabic, Lithuanian, Russian, Cantonese, Mandarin, Portuguese, Mexican-Spanish, various traditional Afircan languages, Stran, Hindi, Magyar, Romance, Roma, and of course Deustch among others to be included.

I agree with invading the Isle of Man. The assets therein could be used to pay off the national debt and Manx could be reintroduced with a proper Gaelic orthography.

I am not sure about all these other languages, but if you must have some the Frisian seems a runner.

[Shamrock Shore]

I love this and laugh every time I see it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3elLmrCmOqo&feature=feedrec_grec_index

[Hardy]

My first act will be to donate Louth to the North

Jazes Hardy - could we not try and get a few bob for it?

I mean surely half a nice bridge, Oriel Park and the all weather racing track, plus the fabulous Cooley penisula as well as eh, some of dem chippers in Dundalk late on a Friday night must be worth something.

Oliver Plunkett's head is probably worth a few grand

I suppose we might get a few bob for scrappage. As long as it's gone come July and d'anniversary.