Things that make you go What the F**k?

[LeoMc]

9 month old boy charged with attempted murder!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-news-from-elsewhere-26887186

[Minder]

Pakistan: Nine-month-old boy accused of planning murder
By News from Elsewhere...
...media reports from around the world, found by BBC Monitoring
4 April 2014 Last updated at 12:25

A nine-month-old boy has appeared in court in Pakistan on charges of planning a murder, threatening police and interfering in state affairs, it appears.

Baby Muhammad Mosa Khan is one of more than 30 people facing charges after a police raid to catch suspected gas thieves in the city of Lahore, The News website reports. Police say the suspects tried to murder security officers by pelting them with stones. But the Times of India newspaper quotes the infant's father as saying the group was protesting against an electricity shortage.

The infant appeared in the courtroom sitting on his father's lap and clasping a bottle. He was given bail and the case has been adjourned until 12 April, reports from Lahore say. His father is also among the accused.

The murder charges against a baby have alarmed Punjab's Chief Minister Muhammad Shahbaz Sharif. He has asked for clarification from the province's inspector-general of police and demanded "stern action" against the officials who registered the case.

The assistant superintendant who filed the charges has subsequently been suspended, The Nation website says.

[Orior]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

[haranguerer]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

[johnneycool]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

[muppet]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

[seafoid]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

I know that song.
It was Willie McCrea's only British mainland chart hit in 1974 but I can't remember the tune

[AQMP]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

Surely that should be PSNA??  Polis Servyse Norlin Airlan

[muppet]

I have translated it to Jive just to help some of our foreign readers:

De No'dern Ireland Policin' Bo'd
is seekin' t'appoint some Chief Constable,
to join de PSNI Service Executive Team.
'S coo', bro.

[brokencrossbar1]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

Surely that should be PSNA??  Polis Servyse Norlin Airlan

Sums up the whole f**king shit-house perfectly with their old madey-uppy language!!!! 

[Orior]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

Surely that should be PSNA??  Polis Servyse Norlin Airlan

Sums up the whole f**king shit-house perfectly with their old madey-uppy language!!!!

Ulster Scots is actually a cunning and clever plan by Sinn Fein to lure unsuspecting unionists into appearing as complete dick heads to the world. Do you think they will ever catch on?

[muppet]

Job advert - not a joke apparently

http://www.nipolicingboard.org.uk/24.03.14_-_final_version_chief_constable_advert.pdf

Good, because if it is I don't get it?

Would Martin Callinan qualify?

As long as he understands this:

"Tha Norlin Airlan Polis-wark
Boord is leukkin tae tak oan
a Heid Offyser furtae jyne tha
PSNI Ontak Guidin Core."

Surely that should be PSNA??  Polis Servyse Norlin Airlan

Sums up the whole f**king shit-house perfectly with their old madey-uppy language!!!!

Ulster Scots is actually a cunning and clever plan by Sinn Fein to lure unsuspecting unionists into appearing as complete dick heads to the world. Do you think they will ever catch on?

Wool uyt fuk!

[BennyHarp]

A tragic story for the kid involved but it did make me go wtf??

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2605306/Dublin-schoolboy-coma-suffering-heart-attack-classmates-squeezed-testicles.html

[give her dixie]

The Conservative mayor of Swindon has resigned after he called disabled people "Mongols" and questioned whether they should be allowed to have sex.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/04/15/swindon-mayor-nick-martin-mongols-resigns_n_5151125.html

[Puckoon]

http://www.kfc.com/corsage/