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Messages - Banter Panther

#46
To be honest, I don't see past Dublin. I think they may be as good as the Kerry and Tyrone team of the 00's, maybe even better. It will take time to prove it, but I'd back them to do it.

That said, nobody is unbeatable. There was a lot of talk of Donegal being unbeatable last year, and it simply wasn't true. Even a team as good as Dublin can throw in a bad day at the office. Are Kerry, Cork or Mayo not good enough to take advantage? Of course they are. Nothing is a certainty.
#47
GAA Discussion / Re: New ALL Series
April 30, 2014, 04:54:29 PM
Okay. I'm sorry.
#48
GAA Discussion / Re: New ALL Series
April 30, 2014, 04:52:09 PM
Two groups of 16 teams.
Each of the two groups of 16 split into 8 groups of two, leaving 16 groups overall. In these sixteen groups, each team plays each other three times (at home, neutrally, and away).
The top two teams in each of the sixteen groups advance to the championship leaving us with 32 teams overall.
The 32 counties are then drawn into sixteen different pairings, with pairings played over two legs, home and away. The winner of each pairing advances to the Super Championship. The 16 losers also advance. This leaves 32 counties, who will be split into 8 groups of 4.
Each team plays each other twice, with the winners of each group advancing to the All-Ireland series. Here, all teams play home and away, except of Dublin, who play two legs at home. After this round, the rest of the championship is declared null and void, with Dublin being awarded the All-Ireland.
#49
GAA Discussion / Re: Dublin and illegal tackling
April 30, 2014, 04:06:09 PM
Dublin success has a penchant for pissing people off. Are they doing anything else wrong? Gun running? Shooting down hoes? I'm sure there's some way of linking Dublin football to the lack of snow in Africa this Christmas time? That would be a nice stone to aim at them.
#50
General discussion / Re: New Saints
April 30, 2014, 03:45:03 PM
^Jeebus that's like something I'd write! A quare shtory Dixie  :-\
#51
Good lad, Bingo :) you've earned my undying respect.
#52
Quote from: Bingo on April 30, 2014, 03:18:40 PM
Fair play, if you keep trying one of these might actually be funny.....some day...maybe.
I will keep trying Bingo :) as a hero-member, I will take great notice of what you say. What battles were you cowering behind a stone at? :)
#53
With the Championship just around the corner, it looks as if Galway's hurlers may have once again put their hopes of All-Ireland glory in jeopardy.

Galway have frequently been associated with a lack of co-operation, and at time furious in-fighting, and sadly for fans of the Tribesmen, it looks as if 2014 may be no different. After a decent opening half performance against Kilkenny in their NHL semi-final, it has emerged that Galway's second half capitulation may have been the result of a familiar problem.

'We came into the dressing room, and a certain Portumna man made the discovery that the cookie jar had been raided. Things got heated, we'll put it that way. I reckon he was in on it, and one of the Portumna subs that done it. They've it all tied up between them.', said a Loughrea clubman, who did not wish to be named.

Another unnamed panel member from Gort presented a different slant to proceedings. 'One of the Ardrahan boys got up and bellowed 'Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? St. Thomas' stole the cookies from the cookie jar!'.' The Gortman continued, 'Thomas' were having none of it. Couldn't be, they said. The Ardrahan boys were perplexed. But sure who cares what they think, everyone knows it was the Kinvarra Klan'.

Tony Óg Regan waived his right to anonymity, and through tears managed to blurt out 'I'm so sick of all this fighting. There wasn't even a cookie jar in the bloody dressing room!'.

While presenting a picture of disunity, the players did manage to agree that if no perpetrator could be found, management should definitely be blamed for their immaturity, an immaturity borne out of frustration at the lack of respect given to them for their achievements at minor level by seniors in other counties. The validity of this news report is highly tenuous, and Banter Panther accepts no responsibility.
#54
Quote from: Eamonnca1 on April 29, 2014, 06:59:09 PM
Quality!
Yes, he is a capable and articulate writer.
#55
Quote from: BennyCake on April 30, 2014, 12:41:23 AM
It's gone all Eileen Drewery...
Drewery is a poor man's Mdebe. Mdebe is the witch doctor's witch doctor. She is the sole reason for Dublin's success. Watch as they fall asunder against Laois or Wicklow in Leinster. Dublin are toast now.
#56
Quote from: Syferus on April 29, 2014, 07:55:18 PM
You need to pace yourself better, Black Panter.
Thanks for the advice. I have decided to ignore it. I wish you the best regardless.
#57
Lads, lads, stay focused on Gavin's comments. A lot of allegations being fired around there Thisonegoesto11, disgraceful allegations. There is no way I got this is from the Daily Sport!
#59
I'll go with Cyawvun so I will hi. I'm going to write up a preview tomorrow for anyone that's interested.
#60
Amid much speculation and debate within G.A.A circles, Dublin manager Jim Gavin has admitted Dublin are in receipt of a massive advantage over opposition teams, an advantage he is sensationally willing to hand over to prove his team's true worth, once and for all.

Over the past three years, Dublin's persistent access to well known Zimbabwean witch doctor Binterre Mbede has come under severe scrutiny. Mbede, 68, who has been living in Clondalkin intermittently since May of 2011, is seen by many as the sole reason for Dublin's incredible success over the past three years.

'She got us out of jail big time in 2011', admitted Gavin. 'There was no way we were going to win that final. I was looking on, and noticed that Pat Gilroy turned to a rather eccentric looking lady sitting up with the players. That woman was Binno, and it turns out that she was a key element to Dublin's success. She still is, if I'm being honest. I'm told she lit a match to a crude doll, vaguely resembling Killian Young, and this saw the mistake that led to Kevin's goal.'

'Before Clucko's last minute free, she reportedly got the subs together to hold hands and recite a prayer. The ball flew right between the sticks.'

Mdebe returned home to Zimbabwe to visit her family in August of 2012, and as a result was unavailable to Dublin as they bowed out to Mayo in the All-Ireland semi-finals. However, she was back for the Metropolitans last year as they claimed success in the League, Leinster and All-Ireland championships.

'I didn't want to use her, but things weren't looking good in the final. I gave in to temptation. Binno beheaded a chicken in the dressing room. It survived for about an hour afterwards, while Aidan O'Shea proceeded to mimic the chicken's every move for the rest of the game. It happened in the league semi-final again this year, she kicked down a Jenga tower and Cork collapsed. It's nice to win, but I don't feel right about it, truth be told'.

The GAA have continuously overlooked Dublin's use of voodoo, but have put a stop to Kerry's use of a druid from Castleisland. Tyrone were given short thrift when applying to have well known witch doctor Murty McGilligooly as part of their panel, enforcing a previously unknown rule prohibiting over-60's from lining out for county teams. McGilligooly was banned for life after urinating in a designated smoking area at Croke Park, an incident that McGilligooly strongly denies ever took place.

'It's time we give up this obvious advantage. I want Dublin to prove themselves. I know our lads can do it without the aid of black magic. What we've done is wrong.', Gavin concluded.

No representatives from the GAA were available for comment. It is not thought that Kerry will be awarded the 2011 Championship, because nobody likes them, nor will Mayo be awarded the 2013 edition, because they are still under the strict conditions of a curse dating back to 1951.