Tyrone v Kerry All Ireland Final 2008

[Hardy]

If it was 10am at night he'd be really drunk!

[Tyrone Dreamer]

SoN won't be starting, it wouldn't be fair to the players that were there all year. I do believe he will be on the bench though as an impact sub. Likely to come on after Galvin.

Hard to know who will be dropped though. My guess would either be Mulgrew or Mulligan.. probably Mulgrew.

no chance of that happening, both still offer a lot if introduced from the bench. I think the man to drop out of the squad will be Jonny Curran not much need for three keepers as two will suffice.

We already had 31 in the panel before O'Neill came back. Curran wouldnt have been a sub anyway unless someone got injured. I'd say he'll tog out 31 or 32 on the day like in 03 (I think thats what happened) but obvioulsy you can only have 15 subs. I wonder does Swift regret leaving the panel after the Down game now - you dont get too many opportunities to be part of a squad in the All Ireland final.

[Fear ón Srath Bán]

wow, you lads really expect to win dont you...

Not in the slightest...

But I will be homeless if we lose!

[Zapatista]

wow, you lads really expect to win dont you...

Not in the slightest...

But I will be homeless if we lose!

Ye already have the beard

[ziggysego]

Tyrone win Mike? Not a hope, we're only there to make the numbers up

[Fear ón Srath Bán]

Ye already have the beard

It all helps Zap 

Hey! dont be getting the hump! only abit of craic. No offence intended.

And no offence taken 

[Fear ón Srath Bán]

Something of a topical piece in yesterday's Irish Times, from Frank Mc Nally 


An Irishman's Diary

AS THE Government grapples with the crisis in public finances, some imaginative fiscal responses will be required. So it seems a rather pointed coincidence that the announcement of an emergency budget should be made just as Russia is marking the 310th anniversary of Peter the Great's tax on beards.

In fairness, the reforming czar's infamous measure was not primarily a fundraising exercise. It was part of a drive to westernise his countrymen in everything including their appearance. More particularly, it was an assault on the power of the Boyars, the Russian noblemen who wore long beards and traditional dress. Peter shaved some of these personally to make his point.

The tax he imposed in September 1698 was only a compromise, after the Boyars resisted his reforms on religious grounds. Thenceforward, they were allowed to retain their beards by paying 100 roubles a year.

But this is surely one possible avenue for Brian Lenihan to explore. Although the motivation would be mainly financial, an Irish tax on beards would also target some modern-day Boyars: academics, economists, left-wing intellectuals, and fundamentalist members of the Green Party. This would make it popular with Fianna Fáil grassroots (and also perhaps with the Green Cabinet members).

Of course, there would have to be exemptions for religious groups: Orthodox Jews, Muslims, Sikhs, and so on. But bikers, ballad singers, and the Fine Gael spokesman on health, James Reilly (who has been tipped to succeed Enda Kenny, despite voters' well-known prejudice against candidates with facial hair) would all be fair game.

Against complaints of unfairness it could be argued that beard-wearers are currently avoiding VAT on razors. But the minister could also defuse such criticisms by simultaneously introducing a new "green" tax on disposable razors with more than two blades.

As well as wringing revenue from saps who fall for those poncey ads with Roger Federer and Thierry Henry, this would help curb blade-inflation in the disposable razor sector which, at current rates, will hit double digits by the end of the decade. The junior Government party would have no choice but to support the move.

Rather than wait until the Budget to bring in the beard tax, incidentally, I suggest the Minister should rush an emergency bill through the Dáil before September 21st, allowing him to impose a "windfall" beard levy on anyone entering Dublin on the weekend of the All-Ireland football final.

This would capitalise on a fashion now rampant in Tyrone. Ever since the shock demolition of the Dubs, the Ulster county's miraculous re-emergence as title contenders (without the help of another Peter the Great) has been attributed to the wearing of beards by several team members.

The more committed and/or superstitious supporters had no choice but to follow the trend, and a rash (as it were) of beard-growing has resulted: suggesting that the All-Ireland final will see the hairiest southbound migration from Tyrone since the Battle of Kinsale.

To minimise traffic disruption, I suggest the Department of Finance sets up barbershop/tax-collection booths at the M1 toll plaza, offering fans a choice of being shaved on the spot (dry, with hedge clippers) or paying the levy.

No doubt some Tyrone fans will try to invoke the religious loophole. But patriotic nationalists as they are, most will be only too happy to help the Free State's finances in an hour of need.

I WOULD like to apologise to the proud people of Wexford for omitting their county from last week's column on embarrassing place-names.

As several have taken the trouble to point out since, the south-east is not just sunny. It also boasts three of the rudest-sounding locations in Ireland: Bastardstown, Horestown, and a place that - even in its American sense - would give Pratts Bottom in England a run for its money.

I will name it in the words of one correspondent who wrote, recalling an occasion when he found himself "lost in the maze that is South Wexford, shouting to a deaf 80- year-old man for directions to Fannystown".

The same man informs me that Hore is a common surname in Wexford, and was once attached to a family of landed gentry near Taghmon. The family's descendents include Lord Gowrie, the former British cabinet minister, who confirmed to the local historical society that he was indeed "a Hore of Harperstown". Sorting out family identities and their geographic origins - a staple of Irish conversation - must make for some interesting exchanges Wexford.

Although we might imagine such names are embarrassing to have in your address, local attitudes typically range between pride and indifference. This may explain the name of a house currently for sale in Wexford. "Two Hoots" is located in Bastardstown. And the several property websites on which it is now advertised on include "Daft.ie". It's a funny old world.

Tyrone too seems to have its share of curiously named places, by the way - including one called "Gammy" and the twin townlands of "Balix Upper" and "Balix Lower". Then there's a place in Antrim, which should be in Tyrone. It's called Beardiville.

FROM embarrassing place-names to embarrassing name-places. The shrine of St Fiacre at Meaux is not, as I suggested last week, in Brittany. There is a church of St Fiacre in Brittany, all right. But as a reader has drawn to my attention, Meaux and the main site associated with the Irish monk is a long way east of Brittany, at Seine-et-Marne, near Paris.

[Mickeys beard]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

[ONeill]

Don't tease the animals!

[gerry]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

that a boy mickey, you keep flying it

[Frank Casey]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

You were lucky the natives showed such restraint and didn't use you for target practice.

[gerry]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

You were lucky the natives showed such restraint and didn't use you for target practice.

they will need plenty of it before the 21st

[Frank Casey]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

You were lucky the natives showed such restraint and didn't use you for target practice.

they will need plenty of it before the 21st

They will indeed although their total of just 5 wides against the langers last Sunday is no bad thing. Still though with we having to get Moynihan and Paidi O'Se out of retirement we must be in trouble.

[Fear ón Srath Bán]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

There's dangerous, there's very dangerous, there's don't want to live anymore dangerous, and then there's that. Glad you're still alive 

[comethekingdom]

Bought a huge Tyrone flag in Killarney today and walked around with it for a while over my back.  The locals weren't impressed.

There's dangerous, there's very dangerous, there's don't want to live anymore dangerous, and then there's that. Glad you're still alive 

Sure, if any Kerry supporter flew a Kerry flag in Omagh, dungannon, Strabane or elsewhere in Tyrone youse boys would'nt get upset or easily wound up? Would ye?