Best film quotes

[Mike Tyson]

Let off some steam, Bennett

Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?
That's right, Matrix! You did!
I lied.

Don't disturb my friend, he's dead tired.

[Milltown Row2]

Not a film but the writers from this show have to be commended on how good they were.

Scene from Friends.

The one where Rachel is having a baby.

Having been brought into hospital and being there for 12 hours in labour (parents out there will know what this is like) the Midwife checks to see how far she is (dilated)

With the frustration of waiting the midwife says " 3cm dilated" Rachel sighs, Ross quick as a flash " 3Cm's!! Even I'm 3cm dilated!!"

[Tony Baloney]

The Joker- Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Goodfellas- Now Go home and get your f**king shine box.

Goodfellas is on TCM2 now.

Funny how? Like a clown etc.

[Tyrones own]

Many many cracking lines in blazing saddles;
The two lads stuck in the quick sand, one of them the
black lad of course....after nearly losing the"$400 rail cart"
hedley says something to the black fella
Regarding them lying Sunning themselves
"Breaks over boy's, don't just lay there gettin suntans...it ain't gonna do you no good no how" 

Lamarr: "My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought,
cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives." Taggart: "Gal-darnit,
Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a 20-dollar whore."

"I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots."
- Taggart,

[LostInSpace]

I don't know what to say really. Three minutes till the biggest battle of our professional lives. It all comes down to today. Now either we heal as a team, or we're gonna crumble. Inch by inch, play by play, till we're finished. We're in hell right now, gentlemen. Believe me. And we can stay here, get the shit kicked out of us, or we can fight our way back into the light. We can climb out of hell. One inch at a time.

Now I can't do it for you. I'm too old. I look around, I see these young faces, and I think... I mean I've made every wrong choice a middle-aged man can make. I pissed away all my money, believe it or not. I chased off anyone who's ever loved me, and lately, I can't even stand the face I see in the mirror. You know when you get old in life, things get taken from you. That's part of life. But you only learn that when you start losing stuff. You find out life's this game of inches. And so is football. Because in either game, life or football, the margin for error is so small. I mean... one half a step too late or too early and you don't quite make it. One half second too slow too fast, you don't quite catch it. The inches we need are everywhere around us. They are in every break of the game, every minute, every second. On this team, we fight for that inch. On this team, we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when we add up all those inches, that's gonna make the f**king difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying! I'll tell you this - in any fight, its the guy whose willing to die who's gonna win that inch. And I know if I'm going to have any life anymore, it's because I'm still willing to fight and die for that inch. Because that's what living is! The 6 inches in front of your face...

Now I can't make you do it. You've got to look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think you're gonna see a guy who will go that inch with you. You're gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team, because he knows when it comes down to it, you're gonna do the same for him.

That's a team, gentlemen. And either we heal, now, as a team, or we will die, as individuals. That's football, guys. That's all it is. Now, what are you going to do?

[LostInSpace]

    Clarence: You must be out your goddamn mind! Joe Louis, the greatest boxer that ever lived. [to Akeem and Semmi] I'll be with you boys in a minute. He was badder than Cassius Clay, he was badder than Sugar Ray, and that new boy-what's his name? Mike Tyson?-looks like a bulldog; he was badder than him, too.
    Saul: Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky Marciano?
    Clarence: Oh, there they go. There they go, every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out they ass. That's their one, that's their one. Rocky Marciano! Rocky Marciano! Let me tell you something, once and for all--Rocky Marciano was good; but compared to Joe Louis, Rocky Marciano ain't shit.
    Saul: He beat Joe Louis' ass.
    Morris: That's right, he did whoop Joe Louis' ass.
    Clarence: Joe Louis was 75 years old when they fought.
    Morris: I don't know how old he was, but he got his ass whooped.
    Clarence: Joe Louis had come out of retirement to fight Rocky Marciano the minute he was 76 years old. Joe Louis was always lying about his age. He lied about his age all the time. One time Frank Sinatra came in here and sat in this chair. I said Frank 'you hang out with Joe Louis, just between me and you, how old is Joe Louis?' You know what Frank told me, he said "Hey, Joe Louis is 137 years old." A hundred and thirty-seven years old!
    Sweets: Oh. Man, you lying, you ain't never meet no Frank Sinatra.
    Clarence: [points to Morris, Saul and Sweets] f**k you, f**k you, and f**k you! Who's next?!

[Tony Baloney]

Many many cracking lines in blazing saddles;
The two lads stuck in the quick sand, one of them the
black lad of course....after nearly losing the"$400 rail cart"
hedley says something to the black fella
Regarding them lying Sunning themselves
"it ain't gonna do you no good no how" 

Classic movie. Classic lines.

[men in black]

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."


 

[men in black]

Verbal: Back when I was picking beans in Guatemala, we used to make fresh coffee, right off the trees I mean. That was good. This is shit but, hey, I'm in a police station.

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.

[maddog]

Are you smoking this shit so's to escape from reality? Me, I don't need this shit. I am reality. There's the way it ought to be, and there's the way it is. Elias was full of shit. Elias was a crusader. Now, I got no fight... with any man who does what he's told. But when he don't, the machine breaks down. And when the machine breaks down, we break down. And I ain't gonna allow that... in any of you. Not one.

[BennyCake]

Ed Rooney: I don't trust Ferris Bueller as far as I could throw him.

Grace: Well, with your bad knee Ed, you shouldn't be throwing anyone.

Classic.

[el_cuervo_fc]

Shooter McGavin: You're in big trouble though, pal. I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!
Happy Gilmore: [laughing] You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
Shooter McGavin: [long pause] No!

—

He slimed me!

—

Doc:William H. Bonney! You are *not* a god!

Billy: Why don't you pull the trigger and find out?

[tbrick18]

Anchorman was on last night....it gets funnier every time.

"Mr Burgundy, you have a massive erection".

"It's so hot.....milk was a bad choice".

[Up The Middle]

Anchorman was on last night....it gets funnier every time.

"Mr Burgundy, you have a massive erection".

"It's so hot.....milk was a bad choice".

No i havent.... ah em its the pleats, its an optical illusion

[tbrick18]

Anchorman was on last night....it gets funnier every time.

"Mr Burgundy, you have a massive erection".

"It's so hot.....milk was a bad choice".

No i havent.... ah em its the pleats, its an optical illusion

There's nothing to see here......don't act like you're not impressed...