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GAA Discussion => GAA Discussion => Topic started by: JMohan on August 26, 2008, 09:06:41 PM

Title: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: JMohan on August 26, 2008, 09:06:41 PM
I was hoping we could compile a list of the weird and wonderful coaching strategies employed by John and in fact other coaches throughout the country ... some of them are classics.

There was the skips story about Derry - but I'm not sure if that was true or if it was blown out of proportion ... was it?

Then there was the Donegal Brazil nuts idea back in 2002 was it?

What are the other ones?
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: RMDrive on August 26, 2008, 09:43:41 PM
Just caught the tail end of On the Ball and they were talking about filling skips full of negative thoughts!! What was the Brazil nuts one? Don't remember that.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Puckoon on August 26, 2008, 09:52:30 PM
Sweet jesus - what did they do with the nuts? Thats mad ted.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: RMDrive on August 26, 2008, 10:00:09 PM
Quote from: JMohan on August 26, 2008, 09:06:41 PM
Then there was the Donegal Brazil nuts idea back in 2002 was it?

Quote from: Take Your Points on August 26, 2008, 09:51:03 PM
He presented each of the Mayo players with a Brazil nut in the changing rooms and told them to go out and play like Brazil.

Are you sure he didn't tell them to go out and play like Donegal?  ;)
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: JMohan on August 26, 2008, 11:15:27 PM
Question is  ... did any of them work!
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: 5 Sams on August 26, 2008, 11:33:56 PM
Wasnt there something about him stopping the Mayo team bus outside a McDonald's restaurant as well and coming with some mad shite............ or maybe I'm imagining it?
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: On_the_Couch on August 26, 2008, 11:47:29 PM
Next thing will be voodoo dolls.  Christ but I hate the sort of pseudo-psychology bs that he seems to employ.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: ONeill on August 27, 2008, 12:18:04 AM
Apparently whilst at Clonoe he hypnotised Kevin McCabe's moustache, making it believe it was a nippy corner forward. The moustache lined out against Kildress and scored 1-2. After a celebratory night of high jinks and beer, the 'tache was fatally shaved by drunken teammates. Things never end happily for big John.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Fear ón Srath Bán on August 27, 2008, 12:25:59 AM
 ;D ;D
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: feetofflames on August 27, 2008, 08:34:38 AM
If Truth be told hes only practising what the rest of us are thinking, whats in all our heads because lets face, it we are all mad as f**king hatters in our own wee ways. 
I know a fellow who trained under him for a few sessions and he claimns he actually sat a pint of water on their heads and in order to promote core stability and balance and what was termed radar vision (eye to air lateral vision- beacuse thats wher the balls come from)  they had to keep the pint of water balancing on their head for 5 minutes at a time.  Kinda makes sense to me.   
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Travis T O Justice on August 27, 2008, 09:27:10 AM
This crap kills me. Did the great teams down through the decades employe these voodoo hoodoo preparations? I doubt it. In those days men were men, fags were smoked at half time more often than not with a half 'un of Powers!

John Morrison is a donkeys arse - not a personal attack on a fellow Armagh man just an observation. I don't condem him for being a donkeys arse er go it isn't an attack (moderator!) and I doubt if he'll read this so no harm done. Donkeys arse none the less.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Hardy on August 27, 2008, 09:41:14 AM
Quote from: Travis T O Justice on August 27, 2008, 09:27:10 AM
John Morrison is a donkeys arse

Because he follows a donkey around? Is this a thinly-veiled attack on Mickey Moran?
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: orangeman on August 27, 2008, 09:58:15 AM
What about the now famous urine testing in Cookstown ???

Now he really was taking the piss there !  ;) ;D
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: brokencrossbar1 on August 27, 2008, 10:24:12 AM
When he was training Armagh with McCorry he apparently washed all the players feet with holy water before their game against Down in the Athletics Grounds in I think 1993, a la Jesus.  Did them feck all square!  That was the day McCartan "welcomed" MCGeeney to county football!
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: thebandit on August 27, 2008, 10:26:27 AM
He thaught McGrane how to catch a ball using balloons
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Aghdavoyle on August 27, 2008, 10:33:32 AM
Quote from: brokencrossbar1 on August 27, 2008, 10:24:12 AM
When he was training Armagh with McCorry he apparently washed all the players feet with holy water before their game against Down in the Athletics Grounds in I think 1993, a la Jesus.  Did them feck all square!  That was the day McCartan "welcomed" MCGeeney to county football!

Paddy O'Rourke
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: ONeill on August 27, 2008, 10:51:43 AM
Apparently he once made the Antrim team wear full facial make-up (lipstick, blusher, eyeliner, curls) against Meath because if they looked good, they played good. Meath won 4-19 to 0-2. Three members of the Antrim team are now ladyboys in Thailand.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Hardy on August 27, 2008, 11:24:58 AM
I heard he made a speech in the Antrim dressingroom after that Meath  match: Youse played Mastermind football out there. Two points and no passes.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: updown9194 on August 27, 2008, 12:00:47 PM
Taught Paul McGrane how to catch by throwing baloons in the air, if I recall correctly...
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: ONeill on August 27, 2008, 12:22:11 PM
I remember being told by a man that he once took the Swatragh Minors. He asked each and every member of the squad to bring their birth certificates in to the next training session. When they did so he tore them all up and told them they've yet to be born and will only be accepted as a son of his if they perform well against Ballinascreen that weekend. Swatragh duly oblidged, drawing 0-8 apiece. He now lives with 22 Derry lads and the wife is scundered making tea. Tohill is bringing home a good wage to the house though.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: feetofflames on August 27, 2008, 12:38:04 PM
He had some great ideas too that just didnt work out.   Theres the classic tale of the month long sex ban for the Clonoe team before their first league game in order to leave his team like hormonal raging savages.  When the referee threw in the ball there wasnt a Clonoe man within the 4 lines of the pitch - they were all trying to climb over the wire to get at a group of Moortown women who were all dolled up for the big game eating chips on the bank. 
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: corn02 on August 27, 2008, 01:09:17 PM
Quote from: thebandit on August 27, 2008, 10:26:27 AM
He thaught McGrane how to catch a ball using balloons

Not a bad method. Keevin Keegan learned hwow to head a ball at Liverpool using the same method.

Pleas explain the Paddy O'Rourke welcome?
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: JMohan on August 28, 2008, 01:15:41 AM
Does McGrane credit Morrison (...........or does Morrison credit Morrison)??
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Fear ón Srath Bán on August 28, 2008, 11:51:37 PM
Quote from: ONeill on August 27, 2008, 10:51:43 AM
Apparently he once made the Antrim team wear full facial make-up (lipstick, blusher, eyeliner, curls) against Meath because if they looked good, they played good. Meath won 4-19 to 0-2. Three members of the Antrim team are now ladyboys in Thailand.

Quote from: ONeill on August 27, 2008, 12:22:11 PM
I remember being told by a man that he once took the Swatragh Minors. He asked each and every member of the squad to bring their birth certificates in to the next training session. When they did so he tore them all up and told them they've yet to be born and will only be accepted as a son of his if they perform well against Ballinascreen that weekend. Swatragh duly oblidged, drawing 0-8 apiece. He now lives with 22 Derry lads and the wife is scundered making tea. Tohill is bringing home a good wage to the house though.

Stop it FFS! A man has to go to work the next day!  :D :D
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Fear ón Srath Bán on August 29, 2008, 12:21:13 AM
The Four Masters have, in yore, recorded that the great Gaels of Ulster (long before inhabitants of the 'Kingdom' had set eyes upon this thing now recorded as a... 'ball'!), being faced with certain vanquishment from the greater massed ranks of the unwashed from across the Irish Sea (too), ushered to their bosom one 'John Morrison'. And he, being the mighty meatball of the neighbouring sept of Oriel, uttered forth such cries as "upon this fjord and stream shall ye build your impossible dream", and duly, and duly did they eat the frogs that hopped in joy, and they did eat the birds that flew in glee, and did the warriors rise and face their foes so fierce, and such power and craft did they so exhibit and exercise, that rendered such formidables so feckless, that now, now are the times of such wondrous civility and beauty in the valleys, and hills too. What a man.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: No1 on August 29, 2008, 11:32:27 AM
 :D

Best thread in months, keep her lit lads!
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: orangeman on August 29, 2008, 11:39:40 AM
Quote from: feetofflames on August 27, 2008, 12:38:04 PM
He had some great ideas too that just didnt work out.   Theres the classic tale of the month long sex ban for the Clonoe team before their first league game in order to leave his team like hormonal raging savages.  When the referee threw in the ball there wasnt a Clonoe man within the 4 lines of the pitch - they were all trying to climb over the wire to get at a group of Moortown women who were all dolled up for the big game eating chips on the bank. 


Brilliant FOF !  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Rufus T Firefly on August 29, 2008, 10:26:27 PM
Quote from: Aghdavoyle on August 27, 2008, 10:33:32 AM
Quote from: brokencrossbar1 on August 27, 2008, 10:24:12 AM
When he was training Armagh with McCorry he apparently washed all the players feet with holy water before their game against Down in the Athletics Grounds in I think 1993, a la Jesus.  Did them feck all square!  That was the day McCartan "welcomed" MCGeeney to county football!


Paddy O'Rourke


Conor Deegan.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: London 2012 on August 29, 2008, 10:58:01 PM
Trained under John a few years back and didn't get on with him at all. He tended to take 90% of the training which was shit. Players had a meeting when things got so bad and decided they wanted mickey to take the training as it was far more enjoyable and results improved thereafter. Mickey will never 'split up' with John but he should if he wants to achieve anymore in the game. He could 'COACH' an All Ireland team no problem. He's not a No1 and never will be. WOuld love to see Mickey join up with a top manager and achieve what he has the ability to achieve.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Fear ón Srath Bán on August 29, 2008, 11:14:50 PM
Legend has it, that as St Patrick was banishing the snakes from the Sod, none other than John (Morrison) stood up and approached the venerable Saint himself, and said "Hold on St Pat, don't you know that thon you're now banishing has so much potential as a lethal and prodigious talent in the top corner", and whereupon the much vaunted Saint interrupted and ceased his miraculous deeds, and lo, and behold, was the forefather and progenitor of young Rónán saved, SAVED I TELL YE, from the awful fate that so existed. And thus, was one of the great myths born, and so extinguished, Amen.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: JMohan on August 30, 2008, 04:49:31 AM
Quote from: London 2012 on August 29, 2008, 10:58:01 PM
Trained under John a few years back and didn't get on with him at all. He tended to take 90% of the training which was shit. Players had a meeting when things got so bad and decided they wanted mickey to take the training as it was far more enjoyable and results improved thereafter. Mickey will never 'split up' with John but he should if he wants to achieve anymore in the game. He could 'COACH' an All Ireland team no problem. He's not a No1 and never will be. WOuld love to see Mickey join up with a top manager and achieve what he has the ability to achieve.
That would seem to be a fair and common belief
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: jodyb on August 30, 2008, 10:06:58 AM
Quote from: London 2012 on August 29, 2008, 10:58:01 PM
Trained under John a few years back and didn't get on with him at all. He tended to take 90% of the training which was shit. Players had a meeting when things got so bad and decided they wanted mickey to take the training as it was far more enjoyable and results improved thereafter. Mickey will never 'split up' with John but he should if he wants to achieve anymore in the game. He could 'COACH' an All Ireland team no problem. He's not a No1 and never will be. WOuld love to see Mickey join up with a top manager and achieve what he has the ability to achieve.

He already did in '93. He just never caught on that coaching's where his strength lies. The subsequent 15 years haven't shown any evidence that he ever will either
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Solo_run on July 01, 2018, 01:58:41 AM
This is still a laugh!
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:03:18 PM
Quote from: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Not sure of what Brady said but he'd never miss a chance to embellish what he has to say about anybody or anything.
The Valentine cards were supposed to be from Sam Maguire and I'm not sure why he picked on 10 of the squad and left the rest out.
The nuts and  the craic about Brazil got a bit mixed up in the telling. They were separate issues.
John boasted that he'd get Mayo to play like Brazil- all out attack at all times. He admitted that Mayo would leak scores at one end but would score more than the opposition with their free-flowing football.

It's fair to say that all of Mayo, including the players, realised that he had lost the plot and should be in a home for the bewildered. We all knew that there would be no problem achieving half of what he was looking for but at the other end there could be problems!
The nutcracker folly was something he had tried out on the Derry players during his time there. The Derry players revolted, telling him that if the likes of Paddy Bradley couldn't makes sense of what he was looking for, the rest of them certainly hadn't a hope.
Nothing daunted, Beefer tried to get Mayo players to implement his strategy and soon found they weren't impressed by his plan either. IIRC, the idea was for players outfield to kick a direct ball into the full forward who would turn his back to goal and hold onto the ball, shielding it from the opposition. Next, both corner forwards would simultaneously race in from the
wings. This was supposed to confuse the opposition as no one would know until the last second which of them would get the off-load.
This was supposed to create a state of panic among the defenders. He created a sense of panic alright but it was  the Mayo forwards who got shit-scared at his proposals.

Given that none of the likely corner forwards were known for their cerebral approach and the fear of a head-on collision between whatever pair were playing was very real indeed.
This yet another brainwave from John that never got off the ground.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: longballin on July 01, 2018, 03:06:31 PM
Quote from: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:03:18 PM
Quote from: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Not sure of what Brady said but he'd never miss a chance to embellish what he has to say about anybody or anything.
The Valentine cards were supposed to be from Sam Maguire and I'm not sure why he picked on 10 of the squad and left the rest out.
The nuts and  the craic about Brazil got a bit mixed up in the telling. They were separate issues.
John boasted that he'd get Mayo to play like Brazil- all out attack at all times. He admitted that Mayo would leak scores at one end but would score more than the opposition with their free-flowing football.

It's fair to say that all of Mayo, including the players, realised that he had lost the plot and should be in a home for the bewildered. We all knew that there would be no problem achieving half of what he was looking for but at the other end there could be problems!
The nutcracker folly was something he had tried out on the Derry players during his time there. The Derry players revolted, telling him that if the likes of Paddy Bradley couldn't makes sense of what he was looking for, the rest of them certainly hadn't a hope.
Nothing daunted, Beefer tried to get Mayo players to implement his strategy and soon found they weren't impressed by his plan either. IIRC, the idea was for players outfield to kick a direct ball into the full forward who would turn his back to goal and hold onto the ball, shielding it from the opposition. Next, both corner forwards would simultaneously race in from the
wings. This was supposed to confuse the opposition as no one would know until the last second which of them would get the off-load.
This was supposed to create a state of panic among the defenders. He created a sense of panic alright but it was  the Mayo forwards who got shit-scared at his proposals.

Given that none of the likely corner forwards were known for their cerebral approach and the fear of a head-on collision between whatever pair were playing was very real indeed.
This yet another brainwave from John that never got off the ground.

would have taken a team of psychologists to get Mayo over the line...
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:33:16 PM
Quote from: longballin on July 01, 2018, 03:06:31 PM
Quote from: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:03:18 PM
Quote from: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Not sure of what Brady said but he'd never miss a chance to embellish what he has to say about anybody or anything.
The Valentine cards were supposed to be from Sam Maguire and I'm not sure why he picked on 10 of the squad and left the rest out.
The nuts and  the craic about Brazil got a bit mixed up in the telling. They were separate issues.
John boasted that he'd get Mayo to play like Brazil- all out attack at all times. He admitted that Mayo would leak scores at one end but would score more than the opposition with their free-flowing football.

It's fair to say that all of Mayo, including the players, realised that he had lost the plot and should be in a home for the bewildered. We all knew that there would be no problem achieving half of what he was looking for but at the other end there could be problems!
The nutcracker folly was something he had tried out on the Derry players during his time there. The Derry players revolted, telling him that if the likes of Paddy Bradley couldn't makes sense of what he was looking for, the rest of them certainly hadn't a hope.
Nothing daunted, Beefer tried to get Mayo players to implement his strategy and soon found they weren't impressed by his plan either. IIRC, the idea was for players outfield to kick a direct ball into the full forward who would turn his back to goal and hold onto the ball, shielding it from the opposition. Next, both corner forwards would simultaneously race in from the
wings. This was supposed to confuse the opposition as no one would know until the last second which of them would get the off-load.
This was supposed to create a state of panic among the defenders. He created a sense of panic alright but it was  the Mayo forwards who got shit-scared at his proposals.

Given that none of the likely corner forwards were known for their cerebral approach and the fear of a head-on collision between whatever pair were playing was very real indeed.
This yet another brainwave from John that never got off the ground.

would have taken a team of psychologists to get Mayo over the line...
I'm sure we can pick up a couple from the Dubs, now that Diarmuid has gone AWOL, ye must a few to spare. ;D
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: joemamas on July 01, 2018, 03:53:06 PM
Quote from: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:03:18 PM
Quote from: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Not sure of what Brady said but he'd never miss a chance to embellish what he has to say about anybody or anything.
The Valentine cards were supposed to be from Sam Maguire and I'm not sure why he picked on 10 of the squad and left the rest out.
The nuts and  the craic about Brazil got a bit mixed up in the telling. They were separate issues.
John boasted that he'd get Mayo to play like Brazil- all out attack at all times. He admitted that Mayo would leak scores at one end but would score more than the opposition with their free-flowing football.

It's fair to say that all of Mayo, including the players, realised that he had lost the plot and should be in a home for the bewildered. We all knew that there would be no problem achieving half of what he was looking for but at the other end there could be problems!
The nutcracker folly was something he had tried out on the Derry players during his time there. The Derry players revolted, telling him that if the likes of Paddy Bradley couldn't makes sense of what he was looking for, the rest of them certainly hadn't a hope.
Nothing daunted, Beefer tried to get Mayo players to implement his strategy and soon found they weren't impressed by his plan either. IIRC, the idea was for players outfield to kick a direct ball into the full forward who would turn his back to goal and hold onto the ball, shielding it from the opposition. Next, both corner forwards would simultaneously race in from the
wings. This was supposed to confuse the opposition as no one would know until the last second which of them would get the off-load.
This was supposed to create a state of panic among the defenders. He created a sense of panic alright but it was  the Mayo forwards who got shit-scared at his proposals.

Given that none of the likely corner forwards were known for their cerebral approach and the fear of a head-on collision between whatever pair were playing was very real indeed.
This yet another brainwave from John that never got off the ground.

Brady is a media hound trying to stay relevant, he comes across as being as dumb as rocks
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: Throw ball on July 01, 2018, 04:00:34 PM
Many of John Morrison's coaching tips are superb. He is a bit eccentric though. If you can pick the good from the 'off field ' stuff then we can all learn something.
Title: Re: The John Morrison Coaching Manual
Post by: longballin on July 01, 2018, 04:49:26 PM
Quote from: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:33:16 PM
Quote from: longballin on July 01, 2018, 03:06:31 PM
Quote from: Lar Naparka on July 01, 2018, 03:03:18 PM
Quote from: The Voice Of Reason on August 26, 2008, 09:16:45 PM
Just heard David Brady on Newstalk 106 there, and he said that Morrison sent Valentine's cards to around 10 of the Mayo panel in 2006!!
Not sure of what Brady said but he'd never miss a chance to embellish what he has to say about anybody or anything.
The Valentine cards were supposed to be from Sam Maguire and I'm not sure why he picked on 10 of the squad and left the rest out.
The nuts and  the craic about Brazil got a bit mixed up in the telling. They were separate issues.
John boasted that he'd get Mayo to play like Brazil- all out attack at all times. He admitted that Mayo would leak scores at one end but would score more than the opposition with their free-flowing football.

It's fair to say that all of Mayo, including the players, realised that he had lost the plot and should be in a home for the bewildered. We all knew that there would be no problem achieving half of what he was looking for but at the other end there could be problems!
The nutcracker folly was something he had tried out on the Derry players during his time there. The Derry players revolted, telling him that if the likes of Paddy Bradley couldn't makes sense of what he was looking for, the rest of them certainly hadn't a hope.
Nothing daunted, Beefer tried to get Mayo players to implement his strategy and soon found they weren't impressed by his plan either. IIRC, the idea was for players outfield to kick a direct ball into the full forward who would turn his back to goal and hold onto the ball, shielding it from the opposition. Next, both corner forwards would simultaneously race in from the
wings. This was supposed to confuse the opposition as no one would know until the last second which of them would get the off-load.
This was supposed to create a state of panic among the defenders. He created a sense of panic alright but it was  the Mayo forwards who got shit-scared at his proposals.

Given that none of the likely corner forwards were known for their cerebral approach and the fear of a head-on collision between whatever pair were playing was very real indeed.
This yet another brainwave from John that never got off the ground.

would have taken a team of psychologists to get Mayo over the line...
I'm sure we can pick up a couple from the Dubs, now that Diarmuid has gone AWOL, ye must a few to spare. ;D

am I from Dublin?  :o