Things that make you go What the F**k?

[lurganblue]

pure rotten ziggy...

anyone fancy a tub of Mr Whippy Ice cream?  

[The Real Laoislad]

4 girls fingerpaint

[Puckoon]

I cant believe you all googled that!

Ive heard enough about that cyber legend email to never, ever open the attachment.

[stephenite]

A Japanese man puzzled by food mysteriously disappearing from his refrigerator got a shock when he discovered a woman had been living in his home for months without permission, police said today.

The 57-year-old man who lives alone - or so he thought - in the western city of Fukuoka installed a security camera and called the police when he saw images of someone walking around his home while he was out.

"We searched the house in the man's presence. We found the woman in the closet," said a local police spokesman.

The woman, named as 58-year-old Tatsuko Horikawa, was found in a flat storage space only just big enough for a person to squeeze into lying down.

She had sneaked a mattress and several plastic bottles into the cubby hole, police said, adding that the women had been arrested.

"She told police that she had nowhere to live," the spokesman said. "She seems to have lived there for about a year, but not all the time."

It is unclear how she managed to enter the home undetected. Police suspect she might have been closet-hopping, moving from house to house.

AFP

[Hardy]

This is from The People (don't ask), so it mightn't be true at all. 

www.people.co.uk/news/news/tm_objectid=17043119&method=full&siteid=93463-name_page.html

THE HANGMAN
EXCLUSIVE Soham bodies farmer exports mobile gallows
By Roger Insall

A FARMER whose land was used to hide the bodies of murdered s choolgirls Jessica Chapman and Holly Wells is selling mobile execution gallows to terror regimes around the world.

David Lucas, 58, and his partner Brian Rutterford were horrified when the corpses of the Soham 10-year-olds were found in a ditch on their farm.

But the pair's pity and compassion does not extend to the victims who dangle from gallows which they export to brutal dictators like Zimabwe's President Mugabe and Libya's Colonel Gadaffi.

Bearded Lucas, 58, whose farm includes land near Lakenheath airbase, Suffolk, where evil Ian Huntley hid his victims, boasted to a People undercover investigator: "I guarantee these will do the job. You can get rid of as many as five people at a time.

"Each unit has five individual gallows and the beauty of it is you can use it over and over again."

Lucas converts covered lorry trailers into mobile execution chambers complete with trapdoors and ultra-strong nooses.

He also builds traditional hangman's scaffolds on platforms of solid oak and redwood. The cynical farmer explained: "These are used mainly as deterrents for outdoor public executions. They cost £12,000 each.

"I don't have one around to show you at the moment but I have got an oak one on order and am just sorting out the paperwork on that. They take me just over a week to make."

Posing as a representative of the Mugabe government, our investigator met Lucas at his gruesome death "factory" at Eldon Farm near Mildenhall, Suffolk.

At the entrance visitors are greeted by some of his grisly work - a towering mock-up of a hangman's gallows.

We told him we wanted new gallows for provincial prisons in Zimbabwe and admired British craftsmanship. Lucas said proudly: "I have two systems - the traditional platform gallows or the mobile units which I have designed myself."

He pointed to an articulated lorry trailer and said: "I build trap doors into the bottom and you can have them with the sides open so people can see.

"Depending on the length of the trailer you could use five or six gallows at the same time.

"They are expensive but you can use them over and over again. Say you only have one execution team - that's all you would need.

"They could travel around from village to village or prison to prison. It could save a lot of time." Lucas added: "They still use these in places like Libya and a few years ago I did some business with Zimbabwe so I know what your problems are."

There are no legal restrictions on the export of execution equipment from Britain but the EU plans to outlaw it from July 30.

When we confronted Lucas about his gruesome trade yesterday he said defiantly: "I'm not doing anything illegal.

"There is a demand for these gallows. I know not everyone will agree with what I'm doing but business is business."

His partner Rutterford - who helped discover the bodies of the Soham girls - told us: "I own Eldon Farm and have been helping David with the sale of gallows. We have a number of foreign countries who buy them."

Amnesty International's UK Director Kate Allen said: "It's appalling that a British company is apparently selling gallows to Mugabe's government.

"It makes a mockery of the UK's efforts to oppose the death penalty around the world."

[Gabriel_Hurl]

http://www.kgbt4.com/news/news_story.aspx?id=141620

A Brownsville man is behind bars in a Mexican jail.

Mexican police say 29-year-old Jesse Campos allegedly drove into a group of people participating in a bicycle race over the weekend.

One person is dead and several are injured in the Sunday morning accident.

Mexican police report that the Brownsville man was driving a 1989 Grand Marquis between Matamoros and Playa Bagdad Sunday morning.

Campos allegedly ran his car into a group of cyclists participating in the third annual Matamoros-Bagdad Cycling Tour.

People from both sides of the border participated in the event.

El Bravo de Matamoros reported that 30-year-old Brownsville cyclist Alejandro Alvarez was killed in the accident.

The Mexican newspaper reported that the following people were taken to the Alfredo Pumarejo General Hospital in Matamoros:

    * Alejandro Salvador Tamez Guerra, 18 years old
    * Juan Machaita, 38 years old
    * Guadalupe Sustaita Martínez, 16 years old

Authorities told Mexican media that Campos admitted to using cocaine prior to the accident.

Jaysus 

[Puckoon]

sweet jesus thats a mental picture.

[ExiledGael]

Seen that today in some of the papers, a true what the f*ck image.

[lurganblue]

from the bbc
Seven dead in Tokyo knife attack 

Witnesses say the attacker drove a truck into a crowd in Akihabara
A man armed with a knife has killed seven people and injured 11 others in central Tokyo, Japanese media say.

The incident occurred in the Akihabara district, a busy shopping area known as Electric Town that is popular with young people and tourists.

A suspect, said to be 25-year-old Tomohiro Kato, has been arrested.

Police spokesman Jiro Akaogi told reporters: "The suspect said he came to Akihabara to kill people. He said he was tired of life".


Advertisement
The scene of the stabbing in Tokyo

Earlier reports suggested Mr Kato could have been a gangster.

The dead include six men, ranging in age from 19 to 74, and a 21-year-old woman, Kyodo News said.

Reports say the suspect drove a rented truck into a crowd in the early afternoon and then began stabbing people at random.

James Slaymaker, a British man working in Japan, got to the area shortly after the stabbings. He described the scene to BBC News:

"As I walked down the street, I noticed there were a lot of police cars. I noticed there was a guy literally just lying there with tape on his eyes and blood pouring out of the side of him. I was appalled.

  When I walked round the corner I saw a woman lying on the floor

Kamran Zaffar, eyewitness


Eyewitness: 'Bodies on road'
In pictures: Tokyo stabbing

"I could see carnage - bodies everywhere. Some were conscious, some were not, lying by the side of the road and on the road. There were people everywhere, a lot of onlookers."

Another eyewitness told Kyodo News: ''The man jumped on top of a man he had hit with his vehicle and stabbed him with a knife many times. Walking toward Akihabara station, he slashed nearby people at random.''

Crime increase

 

The Akihabara district specialises in electronic gadgets and video games and is especially popular with people interested in comic books and distinctive fashion.

It is also home to one of the first shops to sell personal robots and robotics. The area is often crowded on weekends.

Once rare in Japan, there has been an increase in knife crime in recent years.

In January, a 16-year-old school boy armed with two kitchen knives injured several people on a crowded shopping street in Tokyo's Shinagawa Ward.

The Akihabara attack occurred on the same date that a man with a history of mental illness went through a primary school in 2001, stabbing children at random.

Eight children died and 15 pupils and teachers were injured in that attack, in a school in Ikeda, in the city of Osaka.

[Square Ball]

selfish bastard

from the BBC

Plymouth Argyle goalkeeper Luke McCormick has been charged after two brothers died in a crash on the M6.

Arron and Ben Peak, aged 10 and eight, died when the vehicle they were travelling in crashed with his Range Rover in Staffordshire on Saturday.

Mr McCormick has been charged with two counts of causing death by dangerous driving, driving with excess alcohol and driving without insurance.

The boys' mother, Amanda Peak, said their family was "devastated".

Their 37-year-old father Philip is in hospital in a serious but stable condition with fractures to his neck and back, broken ribs, bruising and swelling to his lungs.

He was driving the Toyota Previa people carrier when the crash happened between junctions 15 and 16 of the southbound motorway near Keele services at shortly before 0545 BST.

The brothers and their father had been travelling from their home in Partington, Manchester, to Silverstone racing circuit for a day out.

'Parent's nightmare'

Mrs Peak, 30, was too distressed to speak at a police press conference on Sunday.

A statement was read out on behalf of her and her husband by police family liaison officer PC Andy Kavanagh.

It said Arron "loved life, especially football, at which he excelled, and Ben was a happy, loving son and brother".

"No parent should ever have to go through the nightmare that we have gone through.


The brothers and their father were going for a day out

"Nothing will ever compensate us for the loss we are feeling."

They appealed to be left alone to come to terms with the "life-changing event that has devastated our lives".

Three other people in the vehicle were all released from hospital on Saturday and returned home.

Police appealed on Sunday for anyone who saw the "manner of driving" of either vehicle before the collision or can help with the movements of anybody involved in the incident in the previous 24 or 48 hours.

Police said it appeared the collision had happened in lane two when the Toyota left the carriageway on the near side, going down an embankment and colliding with trees.

Mr McCormick was remanded in custody to appear before Fenton magistrates at 1000 BST on Monday.

[maddog]

This made me go WTF.

The neighbours -

I came home on friday after the weeks work looking forward to getting the work clothes off the back, changed, and away down the pub for a few pints. While looking out the back bedroom window i notice the neighbours wife away down the end of their garden cutting briars and brambes nettles etc. I was thinking, ah well nice to see them doing a bit as the back end of their garden was a holy show. So yer woman picks up a big armful of what she has cut down takes a few steps across the garden and fucks the stuff she has cut over the fence into my garden. So im there waiting for Jeremy beadle to arise from the dead, and she goes and does it again. I walked downstairs and down the garden and says to her can you please explain to me why you are throwing this shit into my garden. So she lets on as usual that she cant speak English and calls the son out of the house. So i ask him "why is your mother throwing this stuff into my garden", "she didnt" was the reply. So with steam out the ears at this point i point out that a) i want a word with your father b) if it happens again i will call whatever authority necessary to get it sorted (believe me i'd say any type of authorities around them would but the willies up them) and c) get the 3 fence panels that border my property but are their responsibility fixed as they have been blown down since feckin January. In the meantime i went back into the house and their she was pulling it back out of my garden into theirs and she put it all in the green recycling bags (like your supposed to) and leave it out for collection.
So the father lands back in his taxi and i collared him. I just said "look i hate to have to say this because i find it embarrasing but your wife seems to think that its ok to throw rubbish in my garden, and if you fixed the fence like you were asked to 3 months ago then she would be less likely to do it." Yer man didnt utter a word in her defence, he just went into his garden and gave out a bit in whatever language it is, so i dont know what was said. Then they proceeded to mow their lawn but mowed around a 13 foot trampoline leaving grass a foot high underneath it.
This is just the latest in a bizarre list of shit they have done.
What can i do?

[Hardy]

If that woman turns up in the canal because hubby doesn't want her bringing the peelers aboutthe place it'll be your fault, maddog.

[ziggysego]

Baby born with penis on back

THIS is the picture that will shock parents around the world - a baby born with a second penis on his BACK.

The tot was born to farmer dad Li Jun, 30, and his unnamed wife, who live in Hejian city in central China's Henan province.

Surgery

But he was rushed to Tianjin Childrens' Hospital on May 27 for surgery to remove his extra manhood.

The rare condition, the first for Tianjin Childrens' Hospital, is called fetus in fetu (FIF).

Doctors, who spent over three hours removing the extra penis on June 6, said he was fine following surgery.

Sourced The Sun: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1273232.ece

He'll be gutted when he grows up. Just think of the threesum possibilities...

[gerry]

when i woke up on sunday morning and i realised i outed a work colleague for having an affair.


thankfully he was not there and everyone was drunk at the time so i might have got away with it.  i will have to wait and see
when comes back from his hols next if i did

[Hurler on the Bitch]

When the fook is he back as I can't wait....