what would you do?

[mannix]

Lately I have started thinking like this.

If somebody crosses me or does something like that in my presence they are doing it because they think I am yellow or stupid or that its their right to treat me like a p***k.

I act coolly and walked over to the father, he seen me coming an picked up boy and bike and started walking the other way, I told him that if I see him at it again he would have to hit me and that i will hit back.
I suspect he will be giving the boy lots of beatings where nobody will STOP him.

[ardal]

Definitely wouldn't have wasted time by going to a discussion board; good job he wasn't drowning I suppose

[ziggysego]

Phone the Police and wait to they arrive. Follow him if needs be, to ensure that the Police know where he is/lives. Be tempted to kick seven shades of shite out of him, but he'd only take it out on the child later, behind closed doors.

[Hardy]

The problem with tackling him in front of the child is the danger that it might further traumatise the child - "my da was attacked by another man for hitting me - that must be my fault too". (Not saying you were wrong Mannix - I admire what you did).

I once lost the cool with a man, verbally shredded him and called him names because of something he accused me of in the wrong. The problem was it was in front of his daughter, about 8 or 10 years old. I hardly noticed the kid until I cooled down, but I regret to this day diminishing him in the eyes of the child. Not the same scenario, but it taught me to be careful what you say/do to parents in front of their children.

I'd say the best approach for the child would be to take out a complaint against him, if there's a procedure for that. That way, I imagine it has to be investigated and social services have to get involved. Knowing he's under surveillance by the authorities should warn him off violent behaviour towards the child and the child himself is unaware of anything.

[Orior]

I'd ask the man what did the child do wrong?

Yeah, because a child deserves to be punched twice in the back of the head, grabbed by his hair & have his face cut because he hit the ground

My question would defuse the situation. You can then deal with the Mr Daddy Thug in a sensible manner.

[mannix]

Boy is the big loser here, his father is a poor father for any lad to look up to.I suppose its a cruel world but from now on I intend on making a stand against this type of thing if i ever see it. I know of another man in Limerick that let the kids go hungry and dirty, seeing is believing, i rented a house to them. The cops did not want to know and the health board told me they were aware of the situation,Parents in the school have complained to the health board too, but its all on deaf ears.Apparently the neighbours would feed them out of pity.
All the while daddy goes off to glasgow to watch celtic and has the massive flatscreen tv,celtic jersey and other trappings of welfare.

[rosnarun]

would you really go to social services and possibly destroy the childs life by condemning him to a life of foster homes and care instituions to soothe your own offended morals on an incident you did not see and maybe was misunderstood by the actual eye witness.
Im not saying never intervene but be aware of the full consequences of your actions

[dodo]

would you really go to social services and possibly destroy the childs life by condemning him to a life of foster homes and care instituions to soothe your own offended morals on an incident you did not see and maybe was misunderstood by the actual eye witness.
Im not saying never intervene but be aware of the full consequences of your actions

Yes very true, she might of soiled his white vest or something. She probably had it coming to her. Bitch !

[mannix]

the gardai,social services,kids school and health board are all aware of these kids plight, i took photographs of the conditions and know first hand, this is not to sooth my feelings, its about child abuse.The beds were covered in urine and excrement and they were not being fed, simple as that.
maybe giving a damn is the thing to do but if we all don't give a damn then what happens?
dodo, what are you saying?

[rosnarun]

Mannix
I was speaking about the original case . your is very different when your aware of an ongoing situation not a gut reaction to something someone saw in the street possibly completely out of context.
this is a very serious issues not a stage for people to let off repressed anger . every step  in a situation like this must be careful and considered.
inappropiate  Cheap dig alert
A celtic shirt itself should arouse suspicion

[The Iceman]

This is a test to see if you are a man or not.

I have been talking about this kind of thing for a few weeks now with a few friends.  Been reading around the subject too and it would seem that men and women aren't like they used to be.....

You often hear women complaining that "there are no real men left anymore"
We complain regularly that all girls are  "ball breakers" and constantly on to us to do better or bitchin to us all the time.

As time has passed and women pursued equality the boundaries between masculine and feminine become blurred.  
Men are eternal boys still chasing the same things they did when they were 16, still going out drinking with the boys, still playing Playstation into their 30's and beyond.  
They are much more sensitive and emotional and a lot more in touch with their feminine essence.  They are passive in relationships.  Not very decisive.  They have given up on pursuing anything major in life and content to drift by.

Women have assumed more masculine roles in society and thus taken away from men their very being.  Women now rule the household, make the decisions, manipulate their men, bring in the bigger paychecks, are involved in sports more.  In some houses the women are the men and the women.

Where have all the men gone?  They are in the bedroom playing PS2 or down the pub watching the football with their mates from primary school.

How many still hold open a door for a woman?
How many would give their seat up on a bus or train for a woman of any age or a pensioner?
How many would speak up when a child gets beaten or a woman?
How many would intervene when they seen another man getting beaten up by two?

I would have intervened and at the very least said something to the father.  Well done Mannix for being one of the few real men still about

[mannix]

apologies,
celtic shirt is not a sign of anything,my brother is a huge celtic fan and so are my relations in donegal,all of whom are very respectable folk,my point was the whole of this family was kitted in celtic gear,  Expensive gear as you know.

[Lar Naparka]

would you really go to social services and possibly destroy the childs life by condemning him to a life of foster homes and care instituions to soothe your own offended morals on an incident you did not see and maybe was misunderstood by the actual eye witness.
Im not saying never intervene but be aware of the full consequences of your actions

There' a first for everything, ros, and this is the first time I find myself in disagreement with you. [At least I think we are approaching the incident mannix reported from different perspectives.]
If I witnessed this incident I feel I would have no excuse whatever to turn away; the consequences of doing so might be terrible for the child concerned. I would certainly report the incident to the police in an objective way.
After that, I would agree to provide testimony about what I saw- if asked to do so at any stage of proceedings.
The matter of removing the child from the parents' care or getting counselling for the father or giving him a warning and leaving it at that would be no further concern of mine.
I certainly would still be upset but I wouldn't see any reason for me to intervene in any way again unless I saw a repeat of the same behaviour by the father towards the child. Then I would make another official complaint and insist on having it investigated.
A child of three cannot make a rational decision about his long-term future and I certainly don't think I can do it for him either. If I turned away and pretended not to notice, I'm afraid my conscience would bother me for the rest of my life and I don't think confronting the father there and then would be of any benefit to the child.

[Puckoon]

Delicate balance. If the child is continually being smacked then you've no choice but to intervene straight away. If the father saw you and stopped, then he's just another cowardly git, and needs to be informed (without alarming the child) that you've seen whats going on, and that it will be reported.

By the sounds of it this kid might have worse memories than remembering the time some man yelled at his daddy in the play ground.

[pintsofguinness]

Mannix
I was speaking about the original case . your is very different when your aware of an ongoing situation not a gut reaction to something someone saw in the street possibly completely out of context.
this is a very serious issues not a stage for people to let off repressed anger . every step  in a situation like this must be careful and considered.
inappropiate  Cheap dig alert
A celtic shirt itself should arouse suspicion

That's bullshit ros, a child would be better in a foster home (if it came to that) than being beat up. It's up to the relevant authorities to investigate the issue.


Iceman, real men would say something to the father? Like what? What would you say to the father? Tell him he's a **** and then what? how does that help the child?