Best/worst lines to woo a lady?

Started by dundrumite, June 19, 2008, 12:04:23 AM

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ziggysego

Flashed your ring at her Gs man? You could get arrested for that ;)
Testing Accessibility

off the laces

Heard one of the mates at this on a stag weekend
"how's Tauras"
Who?
Tauras
Whos tauras
Clit auras
Christ what a slap he got then she snogged the face off him Woman Eh?
Keeps 'er' straight

raisins

Hey - Have you any Irish in you? Would you like some?  :P

brokencrossbar1

Famous line from an old team mate of mine in Cross,

"Well beur, you're munya, can I ride you?"

Subtlety was never his forte but it worked ;D

corn02

I'll have a stab at Mutagh BC.

My old boss in a part-time job used to say to women :

"I would lick the piss off your thighs just to get a taste of ya!."

Will Hunting

Quote from: MW on June 19, 2008, 11:19:14 PM
Quote from: Rois on June 19, 2008, 05:16:10 PM
Quote from: screenexile on June 19, 2008, 04:33:12 PM

If only most women were as smart as you! The amount of time lads waste chatting to girls who either have a boyfriend or aren't interested is scandallous.

Believe me, I do not waste my time chatting to lads that I've no interest in.  Then again, does it mean that a girl who has a boyfriend shouldn't talk to other lads in case they get the wrong idea? 

Here's how I deal with any ladies who I think might be chatting to me out of 'impure motives' (ah, have to admit this isn't a daily occurrance)...simply throw the word 'girlfriend' into conversation.

Girls in the same position could say the same (well, best substitute 'boyfriend' for 'girlfriend' ;D)...not in a "I've got a boyfriend, leave me alone" kind of way, more sort of "Yea, that's a bit like I was saying to my boyfriend the other day, but he said..." Said fella will then be off in a minute or two to try his luck in, erm, unreserved pastures. (Well, normally, I once was cornered a few years ago by a girl who saw this as a challenge and tried to persuade he I should go home with her as it would be a test for me of how I felt about my then girlfriend :-\)

This doesn't always go down well:
http://www.break.com/index/she-has-a-boyfriend.html

:)

brokencrossbar1

Quote from: corn02 on June 20, 2008, 03:12:26 PM
I'll have a stab at Mutagh BC.

My old boss in a part-time job used to say to women :

"I would lick the piss off your thighs just to get a taste of ya!."

He probably did use that line corn but he was a second generation man when it came to being a dog!  Not to sound an old codger but "in my day" we were very "creative" on our nights out!!!

lynchbhoy

my line straight out of the film 'blazing saddles'
' you smell purdier than a 20 dollar whore'
never really worked for me - and I realised this immediately after using it for the first time.
Almost got punched for this, the girl was not impressed.
:o
..........

brokencrossbar1

Quote from: lynchbhoy on June 20, 2008, 03:19:07 PM
my line straight out of the film 'blazing saddles'
' you smell purdier than a 20 dollar whore'
never really worked for me - and I realised this immediately after using it for the first time.
Almost got punched for this, the girl was not impressed
.
:o

That's because she was a $50 dollar whore and you insulted her level of service silly!!!!!

Shamrock Shore

I once heard of (urban ledgend perhaps) of the opener:

"I'd roide ya, only I'm afraid I'd burst ya!"

The Real Laoislad

Quote from: Shamrock Shore on June 20, 2008, 11:10:22 PM
I once heard of (urban ledgend perhaps) of the opener:

"I'd roide ya, only I'm afraid I'd burst ya!"

The vice versa of that is when the "lady" says "Lob it in to me boss,I have a long back"
You'll Never Walk Alone.

young anail

I'll never forget a classmate of mine from South Derry walked up to this yoke in Renshaws (hense she was wearing a cork jersey and an eskra tracksuit top tied around her waist, and 2 pints of fat frog infront of her, and to put it mildly she was feckin massive) and says.."hows your twat for 2 fingers!!" to which the dirty slap came to the side of the head!!Some laugh at the time!

Yes I Would

Quote from: The Real Laoislad on June 20, 2008, 11:11:38 PM
Quote from: Shamrock Shore on June 20, 2008, 11:10:22 PM
I once heard of (urban ledgend perhaps) of the opener:

"I'd roide ya, only I'm afraid I'd burst ya!"

The vice versa of that is when the "lady" says "Lob it in to me boss,I have a long back"

My god a bird comin out with a line like that would put the horn right off me!!

charlie stubbs

not reall words more than actions! fella i know would try and flirt with girls by trying to get them in the headlock and such!doesnt really work for him.  then whn hes getting knowhere he pulls out his "iiiiii your f**king rotten anyway" line.  charismatic guy like.  apparantly he gets the ride every saturday night in portadown though!! :D

JimStynes

A fella who posts on here was known to have said the following line around south belfast in his student days.
Fella- Is that a space suit your wearing
Girl - What are you on about
Fella- its just you look out of this world