Author Topic: Things that make you go What the F**k?  (Read 785119 times)

gerry

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #600 on: August 27, 2008, 10:01:18 PM »
Soup leak forces Ryanair plane to land

A plane was forced to land when a passenger had an extreme allergic reaction to a leaking jar of mushroom soup, it was revealed today.

The soup fell on the man from an overhead locker on a Ryanair flight to Dublin from Budapest.

He reportedly suffered allergic swelling in his neck and struggled to breathe, forcing staff to seek emergency medical treatment.

The bizarre incident happened on Monday, the same day as another Ryanair flight had to make an emergency landing in Limoges after suffering a sudden loss of cabin pressure.

And in a week of mid-air incidents, a Thomsonfly plane full of holidaymakers flying to Gatwick had to return to Croatia after a fire broke out in an oven only moments after take-off.

Ryanair said the jar contained a “vegetable oil/mushroom soup type substance”.

A spokeswoman said: “It is procedure when a passenger requires medical attention to divert to the nearest airport. The cabin crew and pilot take that decision.”

The Boeing 737, which was carrying nearly 800 passengers, diverted to Frankfurt Hahn airport in Germany where doctors could treat the man.

The plane was delayed for two hours before continuing its journey.

On the same day passengers feared for their lives as another Ryanair flight, going from Bristol to Spain, suffered a sudden drop in cabin pressure forcing the pilot to drop to 8,000 feet.

It landed safely at Limoges where sixteen passengers received medical treatment.

The Thomsonfly plane took off from Pula airport in Croatia yesterday and had to return after the fire broke out in a galley oven used to heat in-flight meals.

The plane was forced to turn around almost immediately after take off and was only in the air for seven minutes.

A spokesman said the fire was “immediately contained” and there was “no danger to passengers or crew”.

A replacement plane was flown from Manchester and the passengers delayed for eight hours.
God bless the hills of Dooish, be they heather-clad or lea,

Puckoon

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #601 on: August 27, 2008, 10:28:10 PM »
A good old standby question to separate the townies from the people:

When cattle stand up from lying down, do they get up on their front or hind legs first?

(Explanatory note for city folk - you know cattle as "cows". Hind = back).


Eh, Cattle get up on their hind legs?

Puckoon

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #602 on: August 27, 2008, 10:29:56 PM »
Soup leak forces Ryanair plane to land

A plane was forced to land when a passenger had an extreme allergic reaction to a leaking jar of mushroom soup, it was revealed today.

The soup fell on the man from an overhead locker on a Ryanair flight to Dublin from Budapest.

He reportedly suffered allergic swelling in his neck and struggled to breathe, forcing staff to seek emergency medical treatment.

The bizarre incident happened on Monday, the same day as another Ryanair flight had to make an emergency landing in Limoges after suffering a sudden loss of cabin pressure.

And in a week of mid-air incidents, a Thomsonfly plane full of holidaymakers flying to Gatwick had to return to Croatia after a fire broke out in an oven only moments after take-off.

Ryanair said the jar contained a “vegetable oil/mushroom soup type substance”.

A spokeswoman said: “It is procedure when a passenger requires medical attention to divert to the nearest airport. The cabin crew and pilot take that decision.”

The Boeing 737, which was carrying nearly 800 passengers, diverted to Frankfurt Hahn airport in Germany where doctors could treat the man.

The plane was delayed for two hours before continuing its journey.

On the same day passengers feared for their lives as another Ryanair flight, going from Bristol to Spain, suffered a sudden drop in cabin pressure forcing the pilot to drop to 8,000 feet.

It landed safely at Limoges where sixteen passengers received medical treatment.

The Thomsonfly plane took off from Pula airport in Croatia yesterday and had to return after the fire broke out in a galley oven used to heat in-flight meals.

The plane was forced to turn around almost immediately after take off and was only in the air for seven minutes.

A spokesman said the fire was “immediately contained” and there was “no danger to passengers or crew”.

A replacement plane was flown from Manchester and the passengers delayed for eight hours.


Was it still in the can or how did it hurt him?

Hardy

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #603 on: August 28, 2008, 08:52:25 AM »
Puck wins the international "how do cattle get up?" competition by a walkover. Objections that he cheated by being from the country will not be entertained. The decision of the adjudicators is final.

AZOffaly

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #604 on: August 28, 2008, 09:50:18 AM »
I didn't realise it was a competition :D I thought it was a question to the Dubs.

Hardy

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #605 on: August 28, 2008, 10:54:12 AM »
It was, at first. The Dubs were at a bit of a disadvantage, though.  The concept of getting up, I mean.

gerry

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #606 on: August 28, 2008, 11:36:47 AM »
Quote
Was it still in the can or how did it hurt him?

the passenger had an extreme allergic reaction to a leaking jar of mushroom soup
God bless the hills of Dooish, be they heather-clad or lea,

pintsofguinness

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #607 on: August 31, 2008, 12:34:32 PM »
I didn't know if this was a story for the grinds my gears thread or what the f**k but as it was a "what the f**k"  :o I'll put it here.

Was in a chinese restaurant the other night - really nice place, great grub etc - it's like an old house convertedin to the restaurant so you've got people eating in different rooms basically - very nice but the only downside is you can hear every word that is said. 
But anyway, me and someone I know was put in one section and there was only a couple (must have been in their 40s) there and they've a child with them that was no more than 7!
We were only sitting and they were aruging about who's parents visit more and when they last seen them etc but then they started to give the child a lecture on being the best! It started off with the mother going: "you can't rely on us, the only person you can rely on is yourself, we'll not always be around, you need to work hard and be successful"
wee girl: "I do work hard" (getting distressed)
mother: "no you don't, why is it that I have to tell you every evening to do your homework, you should come home and do it, you need to do extra work"
wee girl close to tears
mother:  "if you worked hard enough you'd be the top of the class, zoey isn't that clever but she works hard, if you worked as hard as her you'd be the best".
Wee girl: (crying at this stage) "I do work hard"
mother: "working hard isn't good enough, you need to be the best"
Father:  "you need to be more motivated"
Wee girl: "ok I'll try harder"

If anyone has ever seen "Parenthood" it was very similar to a scene in that!
Anyway that passed and they started to talk about the missing spare keys which, in minutes, turned in to a row because they were lost and he didn't put them in some bowl, she then near swung for him because he'd his finger in his mouth!

The weegirl then burst in to tears - bawling - mother asked her what was wrong and she says "I hate it when you argue" to which the mother responded with:
"that's pathetic, stop being so pathetic"  :o  :o  :o ...."if it's not working we'll just get joint custody of you"  :o

The child was no more than 7!  These were not chavs, these were middle aged, well dressed people - absoloute idiots who in the space of a hour had about 3 rows and verbally abused their daughter knowing that two strangers could hear every word they said. 
Which one of you bitches wants to dance?

Mentalman

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #608 on: August 31, 2008, 01:14:29 PM »
I didn't know if this was a story for the grinds my gears thread or what the f**k but as it was a "what the f**k"  :o I'll put it here.

Was in a chinese restaurant the other night - really nice place, great grub etc - it's like an old house convertedin to the restaurant so you've got people eating in different rooms basically - very nice but the only downside is you can hear every word that is said. 
But anyway, me and someone I know was put in one section and there was only a couple (must have been in their 40s) there and they've a child with them that was no more than 7!
We were only sitting and they were aruging about who's parents visit more and when they last seen them etc but then they started to give the child a lecture on being the best! It started off with the mother going: "you can't rely on us, the only person you can rely on is yourself, we'll not always be around, you need to work hard and be successful"
wee girl: "I do work hard" (getting distressed)
mother: "no you don't, why is it that I have to tell you every evening to do your homework, you should come home and do it, you need to do extra work"
wee girl close to tears
mother:  "if you worked hard enough you'd be the top of the class, zoey isn't that clever but she works hard, if you worked as hard as her you'd be the best".
Wee girl: (crying at this stage) "I do work hard"
mother: "working hard isn't good enough, you need to be the best"
Father:  "you need to be more motivated"
Wee girl: "ok I'll try harder"

If anyone has ever seen "Parenthood" it was very similar to a scene in that!
Anyway that passed and they started to talk about the missing spare keys which, in minutes, turned in to a row because they were lost and he didn't put them in some bowl, she then near swung for him because he'd his finger in his mouth!

The weegirl then burst in to tears - bawling - mother asked her what was wrong and she says "I hate it when you argue" to which the mother responded with:
"that's pathetic, stop being so pathetic"  :o  :o  :o ...."if it's not working we'll just get joint custody of you"  :o

The child was no more than 7!  These were not chavs, these were middle aged, well dressed people - absoloute idiots who in the space of a hour had about 3 rows and verbally abused their daughter knowing that two strangers could hear every word they said. 

Obviously needed upending with a box. Some people are so self centered they don't notice, or care indeed, about the effect it as on their children.
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man in black

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #609 on: September 01, 2008, 12:35:43 PM »
I didn't know if this was a story for the grinds my gears thread or what the f**k but as it was a "what the f**k"  :o I'll put it here.

Was in a chinese restaurant the other night - really nice place, great grub etc - it's like an old house convertedin to the restaurant so you've got people eating in different rooms basically - very nice but the only downside is you can hear every word that is said. 
But anyway, me and someone I know was put in one section and there was only a couple (must have been in their 40s) there and they've a child with them that was no more than 7!
We were only sitting and they were aruging about who's parents visit more and when they last seen them etc but then they started to give the child a lecture on being the best! It started off with the mother going: "you can't rely on us, the only person you can rely on is yourself, we'll not always be around, you need to work hard and be successful"
wee girl: "I do work hard" (getting distressed)
mother: "no you don't, why is it that I have to tell you every evening to do your homework, you should come home and do it, you need to do extra work"
wee girl close to tears
mother:  "if you worked hard enough you'd be the top of the class, zoey isn't that clever but she works hard, if you worked as hard as her you'd be the best".
Wee girl: (crying at this stage) "I do work hard"
mother: "working hard isn't good enough, you need to be the best"
Father:  "you need to be more motivated"
Wee girl: "ok I'll try harder"

If anyone has ever seen "Parenthood" it was very similar to a scene in that!
Anyway that passed and they started to talk about the missing spare keys which, in minutes, turned in to a row because they were lost and he didn't put them in some bowl, she then near swung for him because he'd his finger in his mouth!

The weegirl then burst in to tears - bawling - mother asked her what was wrong and she says "I hate it when you argue" to which the mother responded with:
"that's pathetic, stop being so pathetic"  :o  :o  :o ...."if it's not working we'll just get joint custody of you"  :o

The child was no more than 7!  These were not chavs, these were middle aged, well dressed people - absoloute idiots who in the space of a hour had about 3 rows and verbally abused their daughter knowing that two strangers could hear every word they said. 

Why dont you write a book on parenting skills.
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reddgnhand

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #610 on: September 01, 2008, 01:24:37 PM »
I didn't know if this was a story for the grinds my gears thread or what the f**k but as it was a "what the f**k"  :o I'll put it here.

Was in a chinese restaurant the other night - really nice place, great grub etc - it's like an old house convertedin to the restaurant so you've got people eating in different rooms basically - very nice but the only downside is you can hear every word that is said. 
But anyway, me and someone I know was put in one section and there was only a couple (must have been in their 40s) there and they've a child with them that was no more than 7!
We were only sitting and they were aruging about who's parents visit more and when they last seen them etc but then they started to give the child a lecture on being the best! It started off with the mother going: "you can't rely on us, the only person you can rely on is yourself, we'll not always be around, you need to work hard and be successful"
wee girl: "I do work hard" (getting distressed)
mother: "no you don't, why is it that I have to tell you every evening to do your homework, you should come home and do it, you need to do extra work"
wee girl close to tears
mother:  "if you worked hard enough you'd be the top of the class, zoey isn't that clever but she works hard, if you worked as hard as her you'd be the best".
Wee girl: (crying at this stage) "I do work hard"
mother: "working hard isn't good enough, you need to be the best"
Father:  "you need to be more motivated"
Wee girl: "ok I'll try harder"

If anyone has ever seen "Parenthood" it was very similar to a scene in that!
Anyway that passed and they started to talk about the missing spare keys which, in minutes, turned in to a row because they were lost and he didn't put them in some bowl, she then near swung for him because he'd his finger in his mouth!

The weegirl then burst in to tears - bawling - mother asked her what was wrong and she says "I hate it when you argue" to which the mother responded with:
"that's pathetic, stop being so pathetic"  :o  :o  :o ...."if it's not working we'll just get joint custody of you"  :o

The child was no more than 7!  These were not chavs, these were middle aged, well dressed people - absoloute idiots who in the space of a hour had about 3 rows and verbally abused their daughter knowing that two strangers could hear every word they said. 

Jesus you're one nosey f****r pints ;D ;D ;D

pintsofguinness

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #611 on: September 01, 2008, 07:35:30 PM »
Quote
Why dont you write a book on parenting skills.
why do you think there's many adults that dont know if a 6 or 7 year old is cry the last thing you do is start calling her pathetic?

 ???


Quote
Jesus you're one nosey f****r pints
I am red, but I hadnt to strain to hear these pair.
Which one of you bitches wants to dance?

Arthur

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #612 on: September 01, 2008, 07:37:53 PM »
I didn't know if this was a story for the grinds my gears thread or what the f**k but as it was a "what the f**k"  :o I'll put it here.

Was in a chinese restaurant the other night - really nice place, great grub etc - it's like an old house convertedin to the restaurant so you've got people eating in different rooms basically - very nice but the only downside is you can hear every word that is said. 
But anyway, me and someone I know was put in one section and there was only a couple (must have been in their 40s) there and they've a child with them that was no more than 7!
We were only sitting and they were aruging about who's parents visit more and when they last seen them etc but then they started to give the child a lecture on being the best! It started off with the mother going: "you can't rely on us, the only person you can rely on is yourself, we'll not always be around, you need to work hard and be successful"
wee girl: "I do work hard" (getting distressed)
mother: "no you don't, why is it that I have to tell you every evening to do your homework, you should come home and do it, you need to do extra work"
wee girl close to tears
mother:  "if you worked hard enough you'd be the top of the class, zoey isn't that clever but she works hard, if you worked as hard as her you'd be the best".
Wee girl: (crying at this stage) "I do work hard"
mother: "working hard isn't good enough, you need to be the best"
Father:  "you need to be more motivated"
Wee girl: "ok I'll try harder"

If anyone has ever seen "Parenthood" it was very similar to a scene in that!
Anyway that passed and they started to talk about the missing spare keys which, in minutes, turned in to a row because they were lost and he didn't put them in some bowl, she then near swung for him because he'd his finger in his mouth!

The weegirl then burst in to tears - bawling - mother asked her what was wrong and she says "I hate it when you argue" to which the mother responded with:
"that's pathetic, stop being so pathetic"  :o  :o  :o ...."if it's not working we'll just get joint custody of you"  :o

The child was no more than 7!  These were not chavs, these were middle aged, well dressed people - absoloute idiots who in the space of a hour had about 3 rows and verbally abused their daughter knowing that two strangers could hear every word they said. 

Why dont you write a book on parenting skills.


He just doesn't like parents or kids - I think he makes half these examples up to back up his hatred - the old I heard  - yeah right.  ::) :'(

pintsofguinness

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #613 on: September 01, 2008, 07:45:01 PM »
5 days
Which one of you bitches wants to dance?

Agnes Dipesto

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Re: Things that make you go What the F**k?
« Reply #614 on: September 01, 2008, 07:49:25 PM »
Poor kid with those two imbecile's for parents. You should have made a point to let them know you heard what they had said and how disgraceful they were.

Arthur, you are a WUM!