the cats in the cradle...

[lawnseed]

Are you a dad? Do you worry that your not good at it. Bringing up kids is a tough job theres so many things you need to do besides bring home the money. I constantly question wheter i'm making a mess of it especially now as theyre starting to get bigger. The lad starting secondary school (the eldest) is the greatest worry. I'd like to spend more time with him but I need to pay the bills.
How do you know if your getting it right? You wont get a second chance.. I want them to get on get good work not the shite im at but how do you know if your getting through to them.. We live in the sticks so they wouldnt be too streetwise.. If they fail and end up all over the globe I'll feel im to blame same old story "could do better" 
Am I worrying too much? Getting them was scary enough but this bit is a knightmare

[Eamonnca1]

If they fail and end up all over the globe I'll feel im to blame same old story "could do better" 

Why would emigration be considered a failure? Out of the five of us, two left the country because we wanted to and two of the others are in England every week for work. None of us are what you'd call 'failures'.

[StephenC]

The best thing you could do for your kids lawnseed is to make sure they don't end up as people who get their kicks out of being insulting, belligerent and pig-headed on a GAA forum.

[JUst retired]

 Bring them up with your values,and you wont go wrong.

[Oraisteach]

Do you think anyone ever recommended that to Charles Manson's parents, just wondering?

[Hereiam]

I have 3 boys all under 5. What lies ahead of them no one knows. I will try and guide them as best I can

[lawnseed]

I suppose I haunted by to words 'could do better' they showed up on so many school reports I remember my mother saying before she even opened them.. "bet this says could do better"... What do you do. Dont want to be the nutty parent. I definately dont want to be a skype dad.

I have one lad who fancys himself as  a professional footballer with my rosiest pair of rose tinted glasses I dont think he'd make a poor pub team. What about being an electrical engineer? I ask yeah dad but the teacher says you should follow your dreams.. And I picture the thousands of x-factor kids balling off the stage when theyre told "that dream you had forget it.. Get back on your bin lorry..

[mayogodhelpus@gmail.com]

Sure why not try some nepotism and give them some land and let them sup from the silver spoon of inheritance and sit behind a computer mocking emmigrants, migrants, those studying or backpacking abroad who refused to let the dole be their option.

[lawnseed]

T

Sure why not try some nepotism and give them some land and let them sup from the silver spoon of inheritance and sit behind a computer mocking emmigrants, migrants, those studying or backpacking abroad who refused to let the dole be their option.

What? ? Im talking about the worry and serious responsibility of being a father and your back packing..? So you think tramping round oz with no money and nothing to eat will help me and my wife sleep better? 
What is it your mate says "take your face for a shite" ?

[ardal]

Instil the correct norms and values and then let them work it out with a gentle guiding hand.

Try to remember what your parents did and said.

Don't worry too much. I actually understand exactly what you're thinking, "christ I can't believe I'm a dad, what the hell do I do, I'm not my parents"

[Eamonnca1]

I have one lad who fancys himself as  a professional footballer with my rosiest pair of rose tinted glasses I dont think he'd make a poor pub team.

If soccer is what he loves then there's plenty of ways he could have a career in it without being a player. Coaching, administration, reffing, sports reporting...

What about being an electrical engineer?

Laudable, but not for everybody.  If he has a passion for it then let him tear away, but I wouldn't just follow the money because if his heart isn't in it then he's not going to earn the big bucks anyway no matter how lucrative the field is.

I ask yeah dad but the teacher says you should follow your dreams.. And I picture the thousands of x-factor kids balling off the stage when theyre told "that dream you had forget it.. Get back on your bin lorry..

X-factor has nothing to do with reality. Success is about small incremental steps, picking up skills one piece at a time over the years and working your way up a ladder.  There's a few critical junctures like job interviews, but very few people go from rags-straight-to-riches with a single audition.

[lawnseed]

I worry more about this than my marriage,money or even my own health i'm not joking. Will they hate me if I push too hard or if I dont push hard enough. Being an older dad relating to them is more difficult I think but on the other hand when I was 30 I still hadnt a clue.
They dont get hit. I got hit it left a space between my da and me that can never be filled. Also I think hitting erodes their confidence. They do ALOT of sport theyre out 3 nights and 2 days a week. Imo they thats more sport than i'd have played in a month. They always get picked so they must be ok..
I'd like them to show a wee interest in how guys make a living

[LeoMc]

I worry more about this than my marriage,money or even my own health i'm not joking. Will they hate me if I push too hard or if I dont push hard enough. Being an older dad relating to them is more difficult I think but on the other hand when I was 30 I still hadnt a clue.
They dont get hit. I got hit it left a space between my da and me that can never be filled. Also I think hitting erodes their confidence. They do ALOT of sport theyre out 3 nights and 2 days a week. Imo they thats more sport than i'd have played in a month. They always get picked so they must be ok..
I'd like them to show a wee interest in how guys make a living

Make them earn their pocket money.

[Cold tea]

I worry more about this than my marriage,money or even my own health i'm not joking. Will they hate me if I push too hard or if I dont push hard enough. Being an older dad relating to them is more difficult I think but on the other hand when I was 30 I still hadnt a clue.
They dont get hit. I got hit it left a space between my da and me that can never be filled. Also I think hitting erodes their confidence. They do ALOT of sport theyre out 3 nights and 2 days a week. Imo they thats more sport than i'd have played in a month. They always get picked so they must be ok..
I'd like them to show a wee interest in how guys make a living

I worry more about the cesspit of society they are entering when they get older, the innocence of youth is lost now.  I was at my son's u10 training and there were wee lads about 12 or 13 standing up from me showing pictures on their phone of girls in their class, one quote was - "you know its (enter name) stupid bitch kept her face in it, and noone else has tits that big" - I swear that made me worry about my kids more than anything.

[lawnseed]

I worry more about this than my marriage,money or even my own health i'm not joking. Will they hate me if I push too hard or if I dont push hard enough. Being an older dad relating to them is more difficult I think but on the other hand when I was 30 I still hadnt a clue.
They dont get hit. I got hit it left a space between my da and me that can never be filled. Also I think hitting erodes their confidence. They do ALOT of sport theyre out 3 nights and 2 days a week. Imo they thats more sport than i'd have played in a month. They always get picked so they must be ok..
I'd like them to show a wee interest in how guys make a living

Make them earn their pocket money.

Turn them into shinners? 

They get good marks for helping out.. Good marks = kentucky mcdonalds treats. But a wee bit of capitalism could work