Author Topic: Depression  (Read 69804 times)

Main Street

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Re: Depression
« Reply #60 on: October 29, 2013, 08:14:13 PM »
That's a great blog by Conor Cusack, and I think the way that psychiatrists in this country throw out medication to anyone who crosses their path is disgraceful and really dangerous. From my own experience, I went through a phase(well a few years, if you can call that a phase) of drinking way too much accompanied with self-destructive behavior and drug taking. This led to depression and suicide attempts. I regularly wound up in treatment centres and psychiatric hospitals where psychiatrists were always quick to put me on medication. Luckily I came off it just as quickly myself every time and when I changed my lifestyle  (quit drinking, smoking and taking drugs, started doing loads of exercise and playing sports again, hung around with different people) my life started to change. Now, I'm a teacher, I recently got married and we're trying for a kid. Life isn't perfect but I don't need medication to cope, thankfully. I know there are people who need it, but as Eamon said it should be a last resort and not the first one as it seems to be for Irish psychiatrists.
What prompted you to change things yourself and what helped you make those changes happen?
I don't think there should be hard and fast rules either way with medication, there is such a thing as the appropriate managed prescription. The main negative issue is that you have practitioners trying to manage depressed patients and they are way out of their depth. Just giving a prescription to them is admitting that I can't manage this patient, I can't talk to this patient, I haven't the time, the curiosity or the life skills - maturity/experience/compassion, to listen to this patient.
And because depression is recognised as a medical disease, medical doctors are licensed to treat it with medication, without any requirement to counsel the patient. Depression is treated like an infection.
I certainly wouldn't expect a harassed MD to have the time or appropriate setup, to deal with a depressed patient.
 Another major issue is that every type of depression, even mild anxiety, is lumped under a medical diagnosis of depression. A student can have anxiety issues about exams and next thing they are prescribed SSRIs and after a month of those, they have worse issues to deal with. The effects of the medication are worse than the original complaint.
In Conor Cusack's  case, somebody sat with him and gave him the space to let him tell his story and probably for the first time ever, he made connections in his life, between his depression and his childhood experiences. I just can't imagine what despair he went through before that.
« Last Edit: October 30, 2013, 03:10:21 PM by Main Street »

johnneycool

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Re: Depression
« Reply #61 on: October 29, 2013, 08:31:33 PM »
Theres some enlightening and thought provoking insights into depression in this thread and larnaparkas previous one and for someone like myself whose father is currently being treated in the conventional way with tablets is of great benefit.
If only to have more empathy with him and his suffering which i know is very frustrating for my mother to deal with.

On the wider issue it seems more common than you're led to believe as there are very few families i know haven't been  directly affected either with depression itself or sadly suicide.

Farrandeelin

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Re: Depression
« Reply #62 on: October 29, 2013, 10:18:15 PM »
2012 was one of the worst years I've ever had - from a personal health point of view. Thought about ending my life more than once. I was sick and tired of not getting anywhere with jobs/women etc. I felt like my friends were sidlining me by not asking me out with them...granted this happens now, but not to the same degree. I generally felt that the world would be better off without me around. To be honest, I don't know how I snapped out of it, maybe I wasn't deeply depressed for long enough, but it was scary.

I must have had at least 7 or 8 epileptic seizures last year too (not a lot - I know, but when you're only 24/25 you're wondering will you be like this for life etc). Maybe that added up as to why I was so down in the dumps, I don't know.

I still get an odd seizure. I was also born with a heart condition too, and that prevented me from playing football which would have had me as part of a team to share my problems with maybe... I feel like I'm rambling on here now so I'll stop, seen as it's a self-centred post.
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Tony Baloney

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Re: Depression
« Reply #63 on: October 29, 2013, 10:31:44 PM »
2012 was one of the worst years I've ever had - from a personal health point of view. Thought about ending my life more than once. I was sick and tired of not getting anywhere with jobs/women etc. I felt like my friends were sidlining me by not asking me out with them...granted this happens now, but not to the same degree. I generally felt that the world would be better off without me around. To be honest, I don't know how I snapped out of it, maybe I wasn't deeply depressed for long enough, but it was scary.

I must have had at least 7 or 8 epileptic seizures last year too (not a lot - I know, but when you're only 24/25 you're wondering will you be like this for life etc). Maybe that added up as to why I was so down in the dumps, I don't know.

I still get an odd seizure. I was also born with a heart condition too, and that prevented me from playing football which would have had me as part of a team to share my problems with maybe... I feel like I'm rambling on here now so I'll stop, seen as it's a self-centred post.
Have you ever read Lawnseed's posts?!  :D

You have had plenty on your plate to be down in the dumps about so there is no shame in that. If the gaaboard is a starting point to getting lads on the road to getting their thoughts "down on paper" then it is worth the millions of posts of pure drivel.

From the Bunker

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Re: Depression
« Reply #64 on: October 29, 2013, 10:53:36 PM »
2012 was one of the worst years I've ever had - from a personal health point of view. Thought about ending my life more than once. I was sick and tired of not getting anywhere with jobs/women etc. I felt like my friends were sidlining me by not asking me out with them...granted this happens now, but not to the same degree. I generally felt that the world would be better off without me around. To be honest, I don't know how I snapped out of it, maybe I wasn't deeply depressed for long enough, but it was scary.

I must have had at least 7 or 8 epileptic seizures last year too (not a lot - I know, but when you're only 24/25 you're wondering will you be like this for life etc). Maybe that added up as to why I was so down in the dumps, I don't know.

I still get an odd seizure. I was also born with a heart condition too, and that prevented me from playing football which would have had me as part of a team to share my problems with maybe... I feel like I'm rambling on here now so I'll stop, seen as it's a self-centred post.

Jez Farr, bar you always being pessimistic on the success of your club and county you always come across on this board as a upbeat lad!

Tubberman

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Re: Depression
« Reply #65 on: October 29, 2013, 11:12:25 PM »
2012 was one of the worst years I've ever had - from a personal health point of view. Thought about ending my life more than once. I was sick and tired of not getting anywhere with jobs/women etc. I felt like my friends were sidlining me by not asking me out with them...granted this happens now, but not to the same degree. I generally felt that the world would be better off without me around. To be honest, I don't know how I snapped out of it, maybe I wasn't deeply depressed for long enough, but it was scary.

I must have had at least 7 or 8 epileptic seizures last year too (not a lot - I know, but when you're only 24/25 you're wondering will you be like this for life etc). Maybe that added up as to why I was so down in the dumps, I don't know.

I still get an odd seizure. I was also born with a heart condition too, and that prevented me from playing football which would have had me as part of a team to share my problems with maybe... I feel like I'm rambling on here now so I'll stop, seen as it's a self-centred post.

Jesus Farr, wouldn't have thought you had all that going on in your life, but then all I know is your online posts which isn't much to go on.
Glad to hear you're getting on better now. Things can change for the better very quickly and unexpectedly in life, nothing is permanent only death.
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Eamonnca1

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Re: Depression
« Reply #66 on: October 29, 2013, 11:56:36 PM »
I still find it difficult to deal with those in depression in the same way as with alcoholics or any addiction, as in working hard to empathise with something you cannot experience.

You're right, it very difficult for most people to relate.  I can give you a list of what not to say:

  • Cheer up
  • Snap out of it
  • Pull yourself together
  • But look at all the positive things you've got going for you.  You've got x. You've got y. You've got z.  How can you possibly be depressed?

The latter is particularly hurtful.  To the speaker it sounds perfectly logical, and you might expect the victim to think "Oh that's right, hadn't thought of that, I'll snap out of it now."  To the victim, it sounds like this:

"You've got no business being depressed.  The way you're feeling is completely illogical, therefore you're doing it wrong, therefore it's your own fault that you've gotten yourself into this state, and I refuse to have any sympathy."

As for the others, if it was as simple as just "cheering up" then I'm pretty sure the victim would have thought of it and done it by now.

The correct thing to say:

  • That must be very distressing

Best thing to do is let them talk, and don't react in a judgmental way that'll inhibit them from speaking.  Best of all, persuade them to speak to a counsellor.  They're trained to deal with this sort of thing.

ONeill

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Re: Depression
« Reply #67 on: October 30, 2013, 12:03:19 AM »
I still find it difficult to deal with those in depression in the same way as with alcoholics or any addiction, as in working hard to empathise with something you cannot experience.

You're right, it very difficult for most people to relate.  I can give you a list of what not to say:

  • Cheer up
  • Snap out of it
  • Pull yourself together
  • But look at all the positive things you've got going for you.  You've got x. You've got y. You've got z.  How can you possibly be depressed?

The latter is particularly hurtful.  To the speaker it sounds perfectly logical, and you might expect the victim to think "Oh that's right, hadn't thought of that, I'll snap out of it now."  To the victim, it sounds like this:

"You've got no business being depressed.  The way you're feeling is completely illogical, therefore you're doing it wrong, therefore it's your own fault that you've gotten yourself into this state, and I refuse to have any sympathy."

As for the others, if it was as simple as just "cheering up" then I'm pretty sure the victim would have thought of it and done it by now.

The correct thing to say:

  • That must be very distressing

Best thing to do is let them talk, and don't react in a judgmental way that'll inhibit them from speaking.  Best of all, persuade them to speak to a counsellor.  They're trained to deal with this sort of thing.

That's exactly the information I was after. I was recently contacted by someone who said they were depressed and I used the 'sure look what you have' line. They looked at me blankly and told me they knew what I was saying but it meant nothing to them.
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turk

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Re: Depression
« Reply #68 on: October 30, 2013, 12:35:42 AM »
Excellent informations and very important insights from all round.
Strength to all here and sincere best wishes

ross4life

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Re: Depression
« Reply #69 on: October 30, 2013, 12:49:22 AM »
Fair play to all those that has spoken out thus far. Thankfully i have never suffered from depression myself but my family has a long history of it TBH seeing your loved ones suffer so badly is heartbreaking.

In early 80s one of my family members was diagnosed with bipolar disorder right up to 2007 he was in and out of this condition but the years of abuse by medication and electric shocks (ECT) means now he can no longer fend for himself, so as you can imagine from what i have witnessed i think you should only use medication in the worst possible scenarios.

Some good tips on here like keeping yourself fit & eating,sleeping well i suppose its about keeping the mind active & try to lower the stress in your life.
« Last Edit: October 30, 2013, 12:51:38 AM by ross4life »
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SLIGONIAN

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Re: Depression
« Reply #70 on: October 30, 2013, 08:04:36 AM »
I still find it difficult to deal with those in depression in the same way as with alcoholics or any addiction, as in working hard to empathise with something you cannot experience.

You're right, it very difficult for most people to relate.  I can give you a list of what not to say:

  • Cheer up
  • Snap out of it
  • Pull yourself together
  • But look at all the positive things you've got going for you.  You've got x. You've got y. You've got z.  How can you possibly be depressed?

The latter is particularly hurtful.  To the speaker it sounds perfectly logical, and you might expect the victim to think "Oh that's right, hadn't thought of that, I'll snap out of it now."  To the victim, it sounds like this:

"You've got no business being depressed.  The way you're feeling is completely illogical, therefore you're doing it wrong, therefore it's your own fault that you've gotten yourself into this state, and I refuse to have any sympathy."

As for the others, if it was as simple as just "cheering up" then I'm pretty sure the victim would have thought of it and done it by now.

The correct thing to say:

  • That must be very distressing

Best thing to do is let them talk, and don't react in a judgmental way that'll inhibit them from speaking.  Best of all, persuade them to speak to a counsellor.  They're trained to deal with this sort of thing.
Because in my experience there was alot health issues over the yrs which impacted my mental health, id like to add a few, please dont say to anyone who is suffering illness the following:

1. Its all in your head (this is for those with a rare illness, ME, CFS etc.. as part of it and is like a dagger to the heart)
2. your making it up
3. Think positive

When i was in dark nights of soul and when the chips were down i faced excruciating physical pain, no energy, mental torture followed because of illnesses and life circumstances and people saying the above and examples eamonn has given pushed me closer to the brink. There was a time i actually considered running away from it all because of the shame and guilt i felt, and id have alot of compassion for homeless people as a result. Luckily i never turned to drink or drugs and instead turned to books and alternative therapies.

Alternative therapy is worth its wait in gold, actually my advise to anyone would be  create healthy diet, even organic if you can and then do as many alternative therapies as possible before looking at conventional medication. One Alternative therapy could trigger massive healing. Remember your energy body exists and you could be like me and obsorbing others negativity and taking it on as your own aswell.

Ive done Reflexology, crainio, shamanic healing, primal healing, NLP, acupuncture, sweat lodges, homeopathy, hynotherapy, reiki, pranic healing, energy healing, kinesology etc....

They are all worth their weight in gold, great healing experiences and massive changes ensued in my life, meet great people aswell who know how to listen, the biggest turning point was curing something i was told there was no cure for. And also having great spiritual experiences along the way and dissolving the reactions of my ego and becoming who i want to be rather than what everyone wanted me to be.

I have to say i am so proud of this thread too, to be able to tell your story and share it will save lives but also standing proud in front of the human race with all your vunerabilities exposed you should acknowledge within yourself that feat because its is massive.
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Milltown Row2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #71 on: October 30, 2013, 09:24:09 AM »
I still find it difficult to deal with those in depression in the same way as with alcoholics or any addiction, as in working hard to empathise with something you cannot experience.

You're right, it very difficult for most people to relate.  I can give you a list of what not to say:

  • Cheer up
  • Snap out of it
  • Pull yourself together
  • But look at all the positive things you've got going for you.  You've got x. You've got y. You've got z.  How can you possibly be depressed?

The latter is particularly hurtful.  To the speaker it sounds perfectly logical, and you might expect the victim to think "Oh that's right, hadn't thought of that, I'll snap out of it now."  To the victim, it sounds like this:

"You've got no business being depressed.  The way you're feeling is completely illogical, therefore you're doing it wrong, therefore it's your own fault that you've gotten yourself into this state, and I refuse to have any sympathy."

As for the others, if it was as simple as just "cheering up" then I'm pretty sure the victim would have thought of it and done it by now.

The correct thing to say:

  • That must be very distressing

Best thing to do is let them talk, and don't react in a judgmental way that'll inhibit them from speaking.  Best of all, persuade them to speak to a counsellor.  They're trained to deal with this sort of thing.

That's exactly the information I was after. I was recently contacted by someone who said they were depressed and I used the 'sure look what you have' line. They looked at me blankly and told me they knew what I was saying but it meant nothing to them.

Yeah this type of stuff will surely help those who have friends and family suffering from depression, that sorta stuff unfortunately runs of the tongue and while it is meant as a pick me up it seems to do no good and you as a friend, actually feel worse for saying it.

Everyone here is concerned and positively posting, great thread, best thread for a while and has united a lot of posters from there usual back bitting of each other, well for a while anyways ;)
Anything I post is not the view of the County Board!! Nobody died in the making of this post ;-)

glens abu

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Re: Depression
« Reply #72 on: October 30, 2013, 09:41:19 AM »
Great thread lads and some very good posts,there is great help out there now for anyone worried about friends or relatives..A good friend of mine lost his son a few years ago and formed a group in Belfast called PIPS 02890287836.They provide training for groups to help them be more aware of the risks of suicide.

Asal Mor

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Re: Depression
« Reply #73 on: October 30, 2013, 11:07:55 AM »

What prompted you to change things yourself and what helped you make those changes happen?


Well I got a lot of help in fairness. I did the alcoholism treatment program in John of Gods, Stillorgan and the people there were awesome. They helped me to feel like a half-decent human being again and I met some amazing people in AA too who've helped me to learn a whole new way of life. Sobriety has been a tough, painful journey and still is at times but I know I'm on the right road anyway.

I'm not knocking medication, just doctors who prescribe it too freely. I know the things that worked for me might not work for the next lad.

Best of luck to everyone with the troubles they've shared on here.

ballinaman

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Re: Depression
« Reply #74 on: October 30, 2013, 11:32:53 AM »
2012 was one of the worst years I've ever had - from a personal health point of view. Thought about ending my life more than once. I was sick and tired of not getting anywhere with jobs/women etc. I felt like my friends were sidlining me by not asking me out with them...granted this happens now, but not to the same degree. I generally felt that the world would be better off without me around. To be honest, I don't know how I snapped out of it, maybe I wasn't deeply depressed for long enough, but it was scary.

I must have had at least 7 or 8 epileptic seizures last year too (not a lot - I know, but when you're only 24/25 you're wondering will you be like this for life etc). Maybe that added up as to why I was so down in the dumps, I don't know.

I still get an odd seizure. I was also born with a heart condition too, and that prevented me from playing football which would have had me as part of a team to share my problems with maybe... I feel like I'm rambling on here now so I'll stop, seen as it's a self-centred post.
Had no idea chief, fair play for putting it out there. I'll be down west a fair bit more in the new year so give us a shout whenever.