Iconic GAA Statements and Utterances.

[seafoid]

Yeah....

I think it depends on the interviewer too. Marty and Carty don't have the smarts.
Tom Humphries used to be very good at drawing out the material. There was one interview with Sean Boylan about 10 years ago that was an example of the craft.

[David McKeown]

What was the one you used to hear about the forward who got concussion and the physio says to the manager "he will have to come off, he doesnt even remember who he is" and the manager responds "in that case tell him hes Oisin McConville and get him back out there"

Hope im remembering that one right

[AZOffaly]

I think that was an old soccer story. The line was 'Tell him he's Pele and send him back out'

[David McKeown]

Probably was. Just one of those stories that had changed over the years. I'd heard it as McConville but the Pele version sounds more believable.

[muppet]

Probably was. Just one of those stories that had changed over the years. I'd heard it as McConville but the Pele version sounds more believable.

"Tell him he's Pele and get him back on."

John Lambie, Partick Thistle manager, on being told that concussed striker Colin McGlashan did not know who he was, 1993

Read more: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/891202/Funniest-ever-footie-quotes-David-Beckham-Phil-Shaw.html#ixzz2PnZQptQP

[IolarCoisCuain]

Tá daoine ar áis i nGaillimh agus tá gliondar ina gcroí. J Connolly agus iad b'fhéidir ag caoineadh láthair
The worst kind of fuckin animals. P Sé
Thanks Offaly. P Doherty

Please add your own. I've loads more.

No longer de whipping boys of Munster
The way they pronounce "Munster senior hurling championship " on the PA in Limerick 
Babs saying he could only get the fellas who weren't educated to listen to him in the end
"The shnow and the hailshtones" of spring 1998

Daly with the veins popping in his head roaring about the whipping byes of Munster was one of the great spakes.

Hard to remember what it was like now they're back in their pomp, but Richie Stakelum's "the famine is over!" is another great spake.

[seafoid]

The joke about Christy Ring

Christy talking to some buck in a pub near Elm Park. Arnold Palmer is after winning the 1964 masters.
The man explains that Arnold won the title with a high pressure putt from 18 feet. "Very high pressure" he says.
"And sure why wouldn't he sink it" says Christy. "There was nobody marking him."

[bigpaul]

DORSEY vArmagh Harps early 80's.Harps powered by Corvan and Devy race into an early lead, ref awards Harps a penalty, L O'Rourke (I think) put his foot on top of the ball and says 'there'll be no penalties in Dorsey today'.The match ended there and then!

[trileacman]

The older Trillick men could tell you the fella's names but I only remember the bones of the story.

Trillick were a man short of the full fifteen for a league match back in the 50's and so asked an ageing supporter to stand in goals for the side. He was clean useless and after letting the umpteenth goal sail past him into the net the "hurlers on the ditch" were in full vitriol chastising his brother who stood amongst them.

Finally the goalies brother could take no more and shouted loudly, "Sure when the 14 other gobshites didn't stop it why should he!"

[Croí na hÉireann]

The Westmeath subs smoking on top of the dug out

[AZOffaly]

That was brilliant. In the old O'Connor Park dugouts. Half time in a LSHC game versus Kilkenny I think?

[Armaghgeddon]

Apparently he once made the Antrim team wear full facial make-up (lipstick, blusher, eyeliner, curls) against Meath because if they looked good, they played good. Meath won 4-19 to 0-2. Three members of the Antrim team are now ladyboys in Thailand.

http://gaaboard.com/board/index.php?topic=9128.15

[Jinxy]

 

[seafoid]

Sometime in the 80s Queens were playing Jordanstown I think it was and they were poor enough. Big match comes up and Queens unveil a new full forward. Plays havoc in the Jordanstown full back line. Scores at will.
Jordanstown full back not sure what is going on.   Something is not right. He hasn't seen this dude at any of the colleges games and he doesn't seem to fit in. Very quiet as well.

So he asks him.

Are you a student in  Queens?
- Yes
And what are you studying?
- Sums

[All of a Sludden]

Sometime in the 80s Queens were playing Jordanstown I think it was and they were poor enough. Big match comes up and Queens unveil a new full forward. Plays havoc in the Jordanstown full back line. Scores at will.
Jordanstown full back not sure what is going on.   Something is not right. He hasn't seen this dude at any of the colleges games and he doesn't seem to fit in. Very quiet as well.

So he asks him.

Are you a student in  Queens?
- Yes
And what are you studying?
- Sums

Christ that's an old one. Told many different ways too.

Old indeed.

Back in my youth, I was on the UCC panel, playing against Queens in the Sigerson Cup final. A man called Cocker Murray was playing for Queens and had scored 1-04. Our manager came up to me and said, "I'm sending you on to mark Murray, I think he's a ringer. Make him confess." So, on I go and I give Murray a dunt. I say "Are you at Queens?" and he says "I am." I ask him, "What are you studying?" He says, "Sums."

It is thought that when Cocker was leaving the dressing room, he asked his manager, "What will I do if they realise I'm a ringer?" and his manager told him, "Just say that you are studying mathematics."