Anyone speak Hogan Stand-ish?

[The Bottom Brick]

This isn't even from one of their message boards. Can anyone translate? I think they're trying to say something about Monaghan hurling, but I'm not sure...

Having been to a right at the death in their opening game against like all modern face a potential banana skin fixture in division 38 when they take on the tram on Sunday 4th March.

It is a game of Monaghan need to win if they are to have any chance of qualifying bodily Toome have proven to be difficult opposition in the past and Jerry Murphy and his charges certainly cannot afford to take anything for granted. Mitterrand were defeated in their opening game to make Monaghan they too will be looking for their first points.

[Redgreenery]

Can't Translate!! They just got a load of words and decided to put them together!!

[winghalfun]

To paraphrase the late, great Eric Morcambe from the Andre Previn sketch.
"I am saying all the right words but not necessarily in the right order."