Lurgan

Started by seafoid, March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

seafoid

I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains. But the Torygraph is the epitome of middle class smugness ....

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/property/uk/revealed-desirable-places-live-uk/
"f**k it, just score"- Donaghy   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbxG2WwVRjU

The Gs Man

Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains.


And these are a few of my favourite things....
Keep 'er lit

illdecide

Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains. But the Torygraph is the epitome of middle class smugness ....

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/property/uk/revealed-desirable-places-live-uk/

::) ::)
I can swim a little but i can't fly an inch

laoislad

Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains.
Would that not apply to pretty much everywhere up there?
When you think you're fucked you're only about 40% fucked.

armaghniac

Quote from: laoislad on March 02, 2017, 03:27:02 PM
Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains.
Would that not apply to pretty much everywhere up there?

No. There are no trains in Tyrone.
If at first you don't succeed, then goto Plan B

illdecide

Quote from: armaghniac on March 02, 2017, 03:45:26 PM
Quote from: laoislad on March 02, 2017, 03:27:02 PM
Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains.
Would that not apply to pretty much everywhere up there?

No. There are no trains in Tyrone.

If there were they could run them on the Red
I can swim a little but i can't fly an inch

ziggysego

Quote from: illdecide on March 02, 2017, 03:49:33 PM
Quote from: armaghniac on March 02, 2017, 03:45:26 PM
Quote from: laoislad on March 02, 2017, 03:27:02 PM
Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains.
Would that not apply to pretty much everywhere up there?

No. There are no trains in Tyrone.

If there were they could run them on the Red

Red, White and Choo-Choo.
Testing Accessibility

lurganblue

Quote from: seafoid on March 02, 2017, 01:42:05 PM
I have never been there but my impression of Lurgan gained from this site was that it is a cesspit, a kip, a home to cider drinking Armagh ASBOs and people who throw stones at trains. But the Torygraph is the epitome of middle class smugness ....

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/property/uk/revealed-desirable-places-live-uk/

How very dare you!

screenexile

If you're a roundabout there's no better place to be than Craigavon and Lurgan because there's a million of the bastards!!!!

Eamonnca1

In its favour:


  • Nice parks
  • Good schools
  • Decent employment opportunities, still has a bit of industry around
  • Nice places to live
  • Thriving GAA scene (5 football and 1 hurling club)
  • Plenty of other sport participation (2 or 3 cycling clubs, which do a long-running collective Sunday ride, a handful of soccer clubs etc.)
  • Good cafes, restaurants and pubs
  • Interesting history and some nice looking buildings

Against:


  • Streets turn into the wild west around midnight at weekends, with no cops in sight
  • Litter
  • Public drunkenness
  • Outdoor underage drinking dens dotted around the place in the hedges, which become breeding grounds for anti-social behaviour
  • Sectarian segregation right down the middle

It would do people the power of good to take more notice of the positive aspects of their town and doing something constructive about the negative, instead of griping about the negative and ignoring the positive. You could say just about any town is a "kip" if you looked hard enough for bad things.

Eamonnca1

Quote from: screenexile on March 02, 2017, 04:51:33 PM
If you're a roundabout there's no better place to be than Craigavon and Lurgan because there's a million of the b**tards!!!!

My brother and his mates used to love taking the motorbikes out on weekends and ripping and tearing up and down the main Lurgan-Portadown road. No better place to practice getting your knee down on the road than on the roundabouts!

illdecide

2nd largest Park in Ireland only behind Phoenix Park in Dublin, Oxford Island Nature Reserve, Tannagmore Gardens, 2 Golf courses, Ski slope and Kilwilkie ;)
I can swim a little but i can't fly an inch

Take Your Points

Quote from: illdecide on March 03, 2017, 10:04:00 AM
2nd largest Park in Ireland only behind Phoenix Park in Dublin, Oxford Island Nature Reserve, Tannagmore Gardens, 2 Golf courses, Ski slope and Kilwilkie ;)

Any visitor to Lurgan can only get a true picture of the town by trying to travel down North Street and then around Kilwilkie. Or visit the only statue in the town to a greyhound.

The town has probably the worst traffic management of any town outside the greater Belfast area.  The two sets of railway gates closing multiple times throughout the day sets up queues in every direction as all traffic is halted until the train sets down and collects its passengers in the station.  It would be bad enough to close the gates as a train passes through but the station is beside the street and the road can be closed for quite a while each time.

Visitors should also be set the task of finding the invisible line across the middle of the town which strictly divides the Catholic and Protestant parts of the town.

An allegory of the town is the new bypass of the town centre which should have been opened months ago but had to be kept closed because they lost the plans to the services buried in the road and it couldn't be handed over for use until it was dug up again to map these services!

Harold Disgracey


The Gs Man

You see this site as well?  Pretty funny.  http://www.facebook.com/thelurganliar
Keep 'er lit