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I know this is not a joke but could someone explain it to me


Nothing you can do with maths applies after reading this. I think that all structural calculations I have ever done are now invalid because of the flawed system. The world is about to end.

Three guys in a hotel call room service and order two large pizzas. The delivery boy brings them up with a bill for exactly £30.00. Each guy gives him a £10.00 note, and he leaves. That's fact!

When he hands the £30.00 to the cashier, he is told a mistake was made. The bill was only £25.00, not £30.00. The cashier gives the delivery boy five £1.00 coins and tells him to take it back to the 3 guys who ordered the pizza. That's fact!

On the way back to their room, the delivery boy has a thought. These guys did not give him a tip. He figures that since there is no way to split £5.00 evenly three ways anyhow, he will keep two pounds for himself and give them back three pounds. OK! So far so good!

He knocks on the door and one fellow answers. He explains about a mix up in the bill, and hands the guy the three pounds, and then departs with his two pound tip in his pocket. Now the fun begins!

Remember £30 - £25 = £5 Right? £5 - £3 = £2 Right?

So what's the problem? All is well, right? Not quite. Answer this: Each of the three guys originally gave £10.00 each. They each got back £1.00 in change. That means they paid £9.00 each, which times three is £27.00. The delivery boy kept £2.00 for a tip. £27.00 plus £2.00 equals £29.00.

Where the hell is the other pound?

i dunno how to put this into words, but i'll try!

There is no need to add the £2 to the £27 - you're just adding 2 numbers for the sake of it!

The fellas spent £27; £25 for the pizza, £2 tip
The pizza place got £30 originally, but returned £5; £3 to the fellas; £2 for the tip
And the delivery boy got £2; £30 minus £25 (for the pizza) minus £3 returned

hope thats clear   

Sunday's Team has now been named: Only one change from the Tyrone game, as John Deighan returns to the goalkeeper's position. 

DERRY TEAM: John Deighan, Kevin McGuckin, Kevin McCloy (Capt.), Francis McEldowney, Liam Hinphey, Gerard O'Kane, Michael McIver, Fergal Doherty, James Conway, Mark Lynch, Barry McGoldrick, Enda Muldoon, Conleith Gilligan, Patrick Bradley, Eoin Bradley.

SUBS: Barry Gillis, Ryan Dillon, Joe Diver, Joe Keenan, Sean Marty Lockhart, Michael McBride, Niall McCusker, Ciaran Mullan, Paul Murphy, Paul O'Hea, Raymond Wilkinson.   

Think this is cute enough from PC, if intentional - McIvor was obviously at the game against tyrone, so crozier isn't showing anymore of his hand b4 the championship, but at the same time its certainly a strong enough team to win!

http://gaaboard.com/board/index.php?topic=2605.90

I think he's referring to this:

http://www.steakandablowjobday.com/

What are speedios? 

have you tried balancing on one foot with you eyes closed - i found this a great help when coming back from ankle injuries. 

Team v Kerry:


1. John Deighan
   
2. Kevin McGuckin
3. Niall McCusker
4. Francis McEldowney

5. Liam Hinphey
6. Michael McBride
7. Michael McIvor

8. Fergal Doherty
9. James Conway

10. Mark Lynch
11. Barry McGoldrick
12. Enda Muldoon

13. Colin Devlin
14. Paddy Bradley
15. Ciaran Mullan

 
Subs:       

      16 Barry Gillis
      17 Michael Friel
      18 Conleith Gilligan
      19 Joe Keenan
      20 Enda Lynn
      21 Kevin McCloy
      22 Sean Leo McGoldrick
      23 Paul Murphy
      24 Paul O'Hea
      25 Cathal O'Kane
      26 Eunan O'Kane
      27 Gerard O'Kane

Tables appear to be updated on the ulser gaa website

Group A:

Team            Played Won Lost Drawn Points For Points Against Points Diff Points
Glenullin             4      3      1     0          58            33                25       6
Ballinascreen       4      3      1     0          59            40                19       6
Maghery            3       2     1      0         43            37                 6        4
Aghyaran           3       2     1      0         32           38                 -6        4
Aodh Ruadh       4       1     3      0          38           60                -22      2
Derrygonnelly     4       0     4      0          34           56                -22      0

The last round of fixtures are:

Maghery v Ballinascreen 
Aodh Ruadh v Aghyaran 
Glenullin v Derrygonnelly 

Four teams still in the hunt for qualification, with glenullin as firm favourities.  Though with only 7 groups i take it there is a best runner-up to qualify.

Any idea when the Maghery v Aghyaran game is being played?

Ardboe 2-7 Kilrea 1-9
Ballinderry 3-19 Culloville 0-6
Ballinascreen 0-12 Ballyshannon 2-5
Slaughtneil 2-18 Roslea 0-6
Dungiven 3-14 Irvinestown 0-7

Congratulation to BBC for showing all 8 Ulster Senior Chamionship games live this year,this is brilliant news for a number of GAA fans who are unable to travel to games especially the older people.

My understanding of it is that the BBC can only show matches that RTE are showing - i'd doubt if RTE will be showing all 8 Ulster Championship matches!

Tables are now up at:

http://ulster.gaa.ie/USCFL2008/Tables/Tables%2017-02-2008.xls

though some of the score differences haven't been updated

Result from yesterday.
Ballinascreen 2-20 Derrygonnelly 2-5

No, not at all. Only the 5 of trumps beats everything.

If the hand is off suit, the 5 of black is better than the seven, whereas the 7 of red is better than 5.

Obviously if the suit in question is a trump, then the 5 beats all.

Maybe I should have said the 4 beats the 7, and vice versa.

oh yeah, my bad.

Though it definitely would have be easier if you used the example of 4 and 7

In it's most basic format (25) the cards are ranked

5 of trumps
Jack (knave) of trumps
Ace of Hearts
Ace of Trumps.
King of Trumps
Queen of Trumps

Then if suit is black the lower non-picture card wins, e.g. the 5 of clubs beats the 7 of clubs.
if the suit is red, the higher card wins. e.g. the 7 of hearts beats the 5 of hearts.
Best trump wins a trick.
If no trumps played by anyone, the best card in the suit first laid wins the trick.

A trick is worth 5 points.

Every player gets 5 cards in each deal. If you have the ace of trumps (trumps is determined by the turning of the next card in the pack after the cards are all dealt) you must rob the trump that was turned up, by laying your worst card face down and picking up the trump turned up by the dealer.

(if the turned card is your worst card, there is nothing stopping you taking it up, and laying it straight back down again face down).

If at the end of the hand there is no one with 25 points (5 tricks) the deal moves on to the left, and scores carry over to the next hand.

My knowledge of 25 is sketchy to say the least but is that not the worst example you could have used, does the 5 of a suit not beat everything in that suit?    

On current form there's no way you could have Gerrard anywhere near the team of the season. Lucky to be in the top ten midfielders this season.

He has got 7 league goals alone, and had won a number of games for liverpool on his own this year playing in a misfiring team. (mores the pity as i am an arsenal fan!)

And 7 assists! Name me 10 other midfielders that have played better this season! Gerard isn't playing his best stuff but he's still better than most.