Your funeral

[Olly]

I have been giving this serious thought lately and have finally taken the courage and told my solicitor that I want to be cremeated and scattered. I always abhorred the thought of being burned in a box but I recently had a death in the family (my dog) and knowing that he is under the ground in the garden breaks my heart, especially when it's cold. I have an awful temptation around midnight with a few drinks in me to go outside, dig him up and cuddle him in the hope that he opens his eyes one last time and smiles. However he is 6 months dead and is probably rotting and full of maggots so that'd be even more scarring.

I told my solictor that I want something by Westlife at my cremeation and I want champagne and laughter even canned laughter if people are moping about and being sad.

What are other people doing?

Also, I have asked him to make me be scattered down Donegall Street in Belfast.

[Ulick]

Why would you tell your solicitor these things - is he also an undertaker?

[Olly]

Because I know my family will want to have a traditional Catholic burial but I have ordered my solicitor to take control of the whole thing and call the police if anyone objects and to show them the letter I wrote.

[ziggysego]

I've been in contact with Aikens Promotions. They're going to get 20-something models to come to my funeral. At the point of burial, they're going to throw themselves on my coffin and start bawling their eyes. Shouting that I was the most amazing lover they ever had.

[Norf Tyrone]

I've been in contact with Aikens Promotions. They're going to get 20-something models to come to my funeral. At the point of burial, they're going to throw themselves on my coffin and start bawling their eyes. Shouting that I was the most amazing lover they ever had.

Ziggy this will be the first one of your parties that I am ever looking forward to then!! 

[longrunsthefox]

Reminds me of the RTE radio presenter out on the streets and asked man how he'd like to be buried. Yer man replies, ...'to the balls in Bibi Gaskin."
Whatever happened to her by the way? 

[delboy]

I'd like to get my send off on a tuesday cos its brown bin day, throw me in with the grass clippings and veg peelings to compost, save a fortune on coffins and all that nonsense

[muppet]

Reminds me of the RTE radio presenter out on the streets and asked man how he'd like to be buried. Yer man replies, ...'to the balls in Bibi Gaskin."
Whatever happened to her by the way?

Yer man found her.

[Olly]

Reminds me of the RTE radio presenter out on the streets and asked man how he'd like to be buried. Yer man replies, ...'to the balls in Bibi Gaskin."
Whatever happened to her by the way?

Did you hear this on the radio or is it an urban myth?

[The Real Laoislad]

Reminds me of the RTE radio presenter out on the streets and asked man how he'd like to be buried. Yer man replies, ...'to the balls in Bibi Gaskin."
Whatever happened to her by the way?

Didn't she go to India to run a hotel or something?

[Geoff Tipps]

Reminds me of the RTE radio presenter out on the streets and asked man how he'd like to be buried. Yer man replies, ...'to the balls in Bibi Gaskin."
Whatever happened to her by the way?

Didn't she move to India and open a hotel??

[Doogie Browser]

One of my mates says he hopes he dies on a Friday so his funeral can be on a Sunday at the main mass and everyone will think how big a crowd turned out for his funeral!

[Orior]

One of my mates says he hopes he dies on a Friday so his funeral can be on a Sunday at the main mass and everyone will think how big a crowd turned out for his funeral!

Thats a very good idea.

*puts note in calendar*

[sammymaguire]

balls deep in this? 



I am not gonna die.

[armaghniac]

Gerry Ryan: (during a discussion on whether people would like to be buried
or cremated when they die) - "Would you like to be buried or cremated?"
Caller: "Oh, buried Gerry."
Gerry Ryan: "And where would you like to be buried?"
Caller: "Up to me balls in Bibi Baskin!"