Things people do on TV / in films that never happen in real life

Started by Eamonnca1, February 07, 2019, 12:19:26 AM

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Puckoon

Everyone's brown paper grocery bag always contains a baguette and a bunch of fresh vegetables

3 days of carnage and near death escapes, wearing the same clothes, no one has brushed their teeth in a week - but the hero and the pretty girl are gonna snog the bake off each other

The magical L shaped bed sheets. Waist high on the leading man, but up to the shoulder on the girl

BennyCake


sensethetone



BennyCake

Quote from: Puckoon on February 07, 2019, 02:47:32 PM
The magical L shaped bed sheets. Waist high on the leading man, but up to the shoulder on the girl

Aye, and woman sits up in bed covering up her top half with the bed sheets. Hasn't the man seen everything already?!

trailer

Anal including Anal to mouth and her loving it. 

Sorry that's a different type of movie.

north_antrim_hound

Quote from: trailer on February 07, 2019, 03:46:07 PM
Anal including Anal to mouth and her loving it. 

Sorry that's a different type of movie.

Different yes but the same detachment from reality.
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets

Jim Bob

Looking round at a phone when it starts to ring

That sound when someone is punched on the chin

laoislad

When you think you're fucked you're only about 40% fucked.

Eamonnca1

Driving about with soft tyres so they squeak like blazes when even going around a slight corner.

ONeill

I wanna have my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames.

BennyCake

Nobody happens to get a call from some bollix trying to sell them PPI.

Main Street

Nobody ever gets caught red handed downloading files onto a usb stick. And this despite the painfully slow movement of the progress   bar, the sound of footsteps outside in corridor getting closer, unbearable Hitchcockian tension building up,  the nerves of steel downloader always manages to grab the usb stick and vanish into thin air, just as the person enters the room.

And nobody ever notices the warning on the screen "device not ejected properly"


Eamonnca1

Operating a computer where there's an annoying bleep every single time something happens on a computer monitor, and not wanting to demolish the damn thing with a sledgehammer after five minutes.

BennyCake

People getting caught out in a thunderstorm, and not shitting themselves about getting struck by lightning.

Sitting bolt upright after having a bad dream.

Any email, text or instant message is grammatically perfect.