Things that make you go What the F**k?

[Declan]

Sean Murphy had a wart so he blasted it off with a shotgun

Thursday June 16 2011

For five years Sean Murphy was driven to distraction by a painful blemish that no amount of creams, ointments or doctors' appointments could cure.
So he came up with his own radical and permament procedure to remove the stubborn wart forever - he blasted it with a 12-bore shotgun.
But not only did the blast take off almost his entire finger, it also left him facing 15 years in jail for the illegal possesion of a firearm.
Yesterday, with only a stump to show for the middle of his left hand, and a suspended 16-week prison sentence, he insisted he had no regrets.
"I'm happy with that," he said outside Doncaster Magistrates' Court, South Yorkshire.

"I know I could have gone to jail for up to 15 years for a firearms offence. My solicitor did a very good job.
"The best thing is that the wart has gone. It was giving me lot of trouble."

Richard Haigh, defending, said Murphy, 38, had been "a victim of his own stupidity when domestic pressures got to him".
Mr Murphy decided to open fire with the Beretta after fortifying himself with several pints of beer. He settled down outside his caravan, took aim and opened fire.
Police heard about his unconventional treatment and launched an investigation.
Murphy, who lives in the town, told the bench he had found the Beretta under a hedge earlier in the year.
Having decided to use the Beretta, he administered the "anaesthetic" of Yorkshire bitter.
He stretched out his left hand, pointed the end of the barrel at its intended target, and used his other hand to hold the stock steady. Then he pulled the trigger.
Murphy denies that the beer affected his aim. He insists the fault lay with the weapon's recoil.
'I didn't expect to lose my finger as well when I shot it, but the gun recoiled and that was it,' he said.
'The wart was gone and so was most of my finger. There was nothing left of it, so no chance of re-attaching it.'
Murphy had been a security officer at Markham Grange Nurseries, Doncaster, at the time he applied the Beretta treatment in March. He has since lost his job.
In court he pleaded guilty to theft of the shotgun by finding, and a second charge of possessing a firearm without a valid certificate.
In addition to the suspended prison term, his client was ordered to complete 100 hours of unpaid community work and pay costs of £100.
South Yorkshire Police are still trying to discover how the Beretta found its way to the hedge where Murphy found it.
They know it was stolen in a burglary two years ago, but have no further record of its passage through the criminal underworld.

- Nigel Bunyan

[LeoMc]

Sean Murphy had a wart so he blasted it off with a shotgun

Thursday June 16 2011

For five years Sean Murphy was driven to distraction by a painful blemish that no amount of creams, ointments or doctors' appointments could cure.
So he came up with his own radical and permament procedure to remove the stubborn wart forever - he blasted it with a 12-bore shotgun.
But not only did the blast take off almost his entire finger, it also left him facing 15 years in jail for the illegal possesion of a firearm.
Yesterday, with only a stump to show for the middle of his left hand, and a suspended 16-week prison sentence, he insisted he had no regrets.
"I'm happy with that," he said outside Doncaster Magistrates' Court, South Yorkshire.

"I know I could have gone to jail for up to 15 years for a firearms offence. My solicitor did a very good job.
"The best thing is that the wart has gone. It was giving me lot of trouble."

Richard Haigh, defending, said Murphy, 38, had been "a victim of his own stupidity when domestic pressures got to him".
Mr Murphy decided to open fire with the Beretta after fortifying himself with several pints of beer. He settled down outside his caravan, took aim and opened fire.
Police heard about his unconventional treatment and launched an investigation.
Murphy, who lives in the town, told the bench he had found the Beretta under a hedge earlier in the year.
Having decided to use the Beretta, he administered the "anaesthetic" of Yorkshire bitter.
He stretched out his left hand, pointed the end of the barrel at its intended target, and used his other hand to hold the stock steady. Then he pulled the trigger.
Murphy denies that the beer affected his aim. He insists the fault lay with the weapon's recoil.
'I didn't expect to lose my finger as well when I shot it, but the gun recoiled and that was it,' he said.
'The wart was gone and so was most of my finger. There was nothing left of it, so no chance of re-attaching it.'
Murphy had been a security officer at Markham Grange Nurseries, Doncaster, at the time he applied the Beretta treatment in March. He has since lost his job.
In court he pleaded guilty to theft of the shotgun by finding, and a second charge of possessing a firearm without a valid certificate.
In addition to the suspended prison term, his client was ordered to complete 100 hours of unpaid community work and pay costs of £100.
South Yorkshire Police are still trying to discover how the Beretta found its way to the hedge where Murphy found it.
They know it was stolen in a burglary two years ago, but have no further record of its passage through the criminal underworld.

- Nigel Bunyan

Just saw the authors name. Has to be a p155 taker.

[ziggysego]

Emperor penguin takes a wrong turn and ends up in New Zealand!!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13856024

[BarryBreensBandage]

Jack Warner, up to the oxters in controversy, enquiry pending, resigns from FIFA...........
and they have declared he is presumed innocent. Plus he now will receive a share of a £10.3m pot that is set aside by FIFA for retired executives.
The blood boils....

[EagleLord]

That FIFA really pisses me off big time.

[laoislad]

That FIFA really pisses me off big time.

Yeah me too,I much prefer Pro Evolution.

[johnneycool]

Just doing as we're told Guv:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-york-north-yorkshire-13873091

[EagleLord]

Jesus Christ. Common sense out the window again.

[BarryBreensBandage]

I hope the local football team won't take offence

[Puckoon]

That own goal is going to be hard to get over.

[DrinkingHarp]

Emperor penguin takes a wrong turn and ends up in New Zealand!!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13856024

Not a wrong turn ziggy, he was just tired of the cold.

[DrinkingHarp]

Free Breakfast, Sick F&%k !!!!!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2011/jun/22/welsh-schoolboy-killed-girlfriend-court-told



Welsh schoolboy 'killed former girlfriend for free breakfast'Swansea court told defendant lured Rebecca Aylward, 15, to woods in Bridgend and beat her with a rock to win bet


Steven Morris and agencies guardian.co.uk, Wednesday 22 June 2011 15.57 BST Article history
A schoolboy is accused of murdering Rebecca Aylward after he was promised a free breakfast if he carried out the killing. Photograph: South Wales police/PA
A schoolboy murdered a former girlfriend by battering her with a rock after he was promised a free breakfast if he carried out the killing, a jury heard.

The alleged killer, aged 16, lured Rebecca Aylward, 15, to woods near Bridgend in south Wales where he attacked her, Swansea crown court heard. To divert suspicion, he told her to tell friends she was meeting someone else. But she did not follow his directions and revealed his identity to her mother, the jury heard on Tuesday.

The boy, who cannot be named for legal reasons, denies murdering Rebecca in October last year and blames his best friend.

Greg Taylor QC, prosecuting, said the accused boy and Rebecca had briefly been in a relationship about a year before the murder and had kept in touch.

The defendant used to meet friends at a local cafe for breakfast, the court heard. At one meeting, he openly discussed killing the girl. His friends assumed he was joking but, in a text,he asked one friend: "What would you do if I actually did kill her?" the court heard. The friend replied: "Oh, I would buy you breakfast."

Two days before the killing, the defendant contacted his friend to confirm he would attend their breakfast date. He added: "Don't say anything but you may just owe me a breakfast." His friend replied: "Sick, sick boy."

After the killing, the boy is alleged to have asked friends: "Do you know how hard it is to break someone's neck?"

The jury heard that the boy told them: "She was facing away from me and I thought: 'This is it, I'm going to go for it.' I tried to break her neck. She was screaming so I picked up the rock and started to hit her with it. The worst part was feeling and seeing her skull give way."

The jury was told the "academic" boy and Rebecca, also a bright child, had dated for three months and had a sexual relationship. Taylor said: "When they split up it was not amicable – all of their friends observed a love-hate relationship between them. They gave different reasons for the break-up.

"The boy said Rebecca tried to trick him into getting her pregnant. She told him she was on the pill and he found out that she wasn't and that she had lied to him. The boy was also telling people that Rebecca was going to go to the police and alleged that he raped her.

"Rebecca's version was that the boy refused to wear condoms and she asked him repeatedly to wear them but he refused." The boy allegedly told a friend: "Wouldn't it be easier if she wasn't here? I am going to kill her – it would be real easy."

The jury heard another friend said the defendant claimed he would "kill her, cover it up and not get caught". He also allegedly claimed he would make "a poison" out of foxgloves and kill her using that. The trial continues.

[EagleLord]

Read that story in the paper the other day, f**king disgusted by it.

[ziggy90]

Going into the local post office this morning to buy 200euro and being told "that'll be £198.06 please".

[Declan]

http://slatest.slate.com/posts/2011/07/03/biker_dies_protesting_new_york_s_motorcycle_helmet_law.html