Things that make you go What the F**k?

[Hedley Lamarr]

Apparently he asked if they could take out the sting.....but leave the swelling

[blewuporstuffed]

Good news for Portsmouth ... Guardian finds missing £4m
wtf? how can you miss count 4 million quid!!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2010/may/14/portsmouth-debt-administration-missing-funds

[gerrykeegan]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWvutny7juk

Bullfighter gets it through the neck and out his mouth.

[the real slim shady]

Cage man rips out mate's heart, eyes

The Daily Telegraph May 27, 2010 7:45AM

A MIXED martial arts cage fighter gouged out his friend's heart and eyeballs after drinking mushroom tea.

Jarrod Wyatt, a 26-year-old California man has pleaded not guilty to murder charges in which he allegedly gouged out his friend's heart and eyeballs.

According to prosecutors, deputies were called after a witness reportedly saw Wyatt in his living room, standing naked over his friend's lifeless body.

The witness told authorities Wyatt had been acting strangely earlier in the day after drinking "some kind of mushroom tea."

The witness ran for a payphone to call police after Wyatt informed him he was about to cut his friend's heart out.

Investigators say a deputy arrived at the residence to find the victim on a couch. Most of the man's face was missing including an eyeball that was found in the middle of the living room.

Many of the man's body parts had been removed - including the heart, which had been gouged out through an incision in his chest.

Medical examiners said the man's cause of death was a result of having his heart removed while he was still alive - causing him to bleed to death.

In addition to murder, Wyatt is accused of torture because medical examiners believe the victim was conscious and aware during phases of his dismemberment.

Wyatt, who trained as a mixed martial arts cage fighter, was arraigned in March on charges of murder, aggravated mayhem and torture.

He didn't enter a plea on his initial court appearance because he appeared to still be under the effects of psychedelic mushrooms at the time.

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/world/cage-man-rips-out-mates-heart-eyes/story-e6frev00-1225871837312

[stephenite]

Home  NEWS  News  Tipsy gives Dipsy a broken nose
Tipsy gives Dipsy a broken nose
Tuesday, 25 May 2010 09:38

Tipsy gives Dipsy a broken nose


A Castlebar man who dressed up as the Tellytubbies character Dipsy could have been forgiven for saying 'tellytubbies say uh oh' when another Castlebar man approached him with intent last Halloween before leaving him with a broken nose.
Michael Flynn of 33, Rowan Drive, had been drinking since midday on Sunday, October 25 when, at 3am the following morning, he heard that a friend of his had been allegedly 'bottled' by someone wearing a green Tellytubbies costume, that as worn by the character Dipsy. Many people were dressed in fancy dress for Halloween.
However, it turned out that there was more than one green Dipsy costume in the town that night and so the rather tipsy Flynn saw a green Dipsy costume and so saw red as well.
The end result was that Flynn walked straight up to Keith Murray, an entirely innocent party who was dressed as Dipsy, on the street at 3am and thumped him once before walking away. Murray was left with a broken nose.
In a statement to Gardaí, Flynn said 'sorry I punched him and I hope he is okay'.
Defence solicitor Aidan Crowley told Castlebar District Court last Wednesday that Flynn was drunk and angry on the night and apologised for his actions. Flynn also presented €1,000 to Keith Murray as a gesture of remorse.
Mr Crowley added that his client was due to leave for Australia the following Saturday (May 22) for work as a fitter for two years. He had been unable to get work in Ireland recently. He asked that a conviction not be recorded as it would hinder his ability to travel.
Judge Mary Devins issued the probation act and advised Flynn not to get 'so terribly drunk' in Australia.

[JUst retired]

Do you not need a criminal record to get in to Austrailia now.? 

[Overthebar!]

not sure if this has been posted.

Too unfit to run: Two-year-old who smokes 40 cigarettes a day puffs away on a toy truck


Taking a deep drag on his cigarette while resting on the steering wheel of his truck, he looks like a parody of a middle-aged lorry driver.

But the image covers up a much more disturbing truth: At just the tender age of two, Ardi Rizal's health has been so ruined by his 40-a-day habit that he now struggles to move by himself.


The four-stone Indonesia toddler is certainly far too unfit to run around with other children - and his condition is  set to rapidly deteriorate.
Truck on bad habits: Ardi Rizal sits smoking on his favourite toy at home in Musi Banyuasin, Indonesia

Truck on bad habits: Ardi Rizal sits smoking on his favourite toy at home in Musi Banyuasin, Indonesia

But, despite local officials' offer to buy the Rizal family a new car if the boy quits, his parents feel unable to stop him because he throws massive tantrums if they don't indulge him.

His mother, Diana, 26, wept: 'He's totally addicted. If he doesn't get cigarettes, he gets angry and screams and batters his head against the wall. He tells me he feels dizzy and sick.'

Ardi will smoke only one brand and his habit costs his parents £3.78 a day in Musi Banyuasin, in Indonesia's South Sumatra province.

But in spite of this, his fishmonger father Mohammed, 30, said: 'He looks pretty healthy to me. I don't see the problem.'

Ardi's youth is the extreme of a disturbing trend. Data from the Central Statistics Agency showed 25 per cent of Indonesian children aged three to 15 have tried cigarettes, with 3.2 per cent of those active smokers.

The percentage of five to nine year olds lighting up increased from 0.4 per cent in 2001 to 2.8 per cent in 2004, the agency reported.
Gun smoke: Four-stone Ardi puffs one of 40 cigarettes he smokes a day while toting a water pistol

Gun smoke: Four-stone Ardi puffs one of 40 cigarettes he smokes a day while toting a water pistol

A video of a four-year-old Indonesian boy blowing smoke rings appeared briefly on YouTube in March, prompting outrage before it was removed from the site.

Child advocates are speaking out about the health damage to children from second-hand smoke, and the growing pressure on them to smoke in a country where one-third of the population uses tobacco and single cigarettes can be bought for a few cents.

Seto Mulyadi, chairman of Indonesia's child protection commission, blames the increase on aggressive advertising and parents who are smokers.

'A law to protect children and passive smokers should be introduced immediately in this country,' he said.

A health law passed in 2009 formally recognizes that smoking is addictive, and an anti-smoking coalition is pushing for tighter restrictions on smoking in public places, advertising bans and bigger health warnings on cigarette packages.
Puff baby: Ardi blows smoke while trundling around on his truck

Puff baby: Ardi blows smoke while trundling around on his truck

But a bill on tobacco control has been stalled because of opposition from the tobacco industry.

The bill would ban cigarette advertising and sponsorship, prohibit smoking in public, and add graphic images to packaging.

Benny Wahyudi, a senior official at the Industry Ministry, said the government had initiated a plan to try to limit the number of smokers, including dropping production to 240 billion cigarettes this year, from 245 billion in 2009.

'The government is aware of the impact of smoking on health and has taken efforts, including lowering cigarette production, increasing its tax and limiting smoking areas,' he said.

Mr Mulyadi said a ban on advertising is key to putting the brakes on child and teen smoking.

'If cigarette advertising is not banned, there will be more kids whose lives are threatened because of smoking,' he said.

Ubiquitous advertising hit a bump last month when a cigarette company was forced to withdraw its sponsorship of pop star Kelly Clarkson's concert following protests from fans and anti-tobacco groups.
Always having a break: Ardi, who is rarely seen without a cigarette, insists on the same brand, costing £78 a day

Always having a break: Ardi, who is rarely seen without a cigarette, insists on the same brand, costing £3.78 a day

However, imposing a non-smoking message will be difficult in Indonesia, the world's third-largest tobacco consumer.

Tubagus Haryo Karbyanto, a member of the National Commission of Tobacco Control, said Indonesia must also address the social conditions that lead to smoking, such as family influence and peer pressure.

'The promotion of health has to be integrated down to the smallest units in our society, from public health centres and local health care centres to the family,' he was quoted as saying by the Jakarta Globe on Friday.

Health Minister Endang Sedyaningsih conceded turning young people off smoking will be difficult in a country where it is perceived as positive because cigarette companies sponsor everything from scholarships to sporting events.

'This is the challenge we face in protecting youth from the dangers of smoking,' she said in a statement on the ministry's website.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1281538/Smoking-year-old-Ardi-Rizal-40-cigarettes-day.html#ixzz0pDHRnAXZ

[omagh_gael]

Was coming up the road in a black taxi today. A southern reg car pulled out in front of us causing the taxi driver to slam on his brakes. The taxi driver cursed a bit and then asked me (I was in the front), "Where is RN anyway"? I told him Roscommon. He looked at me as if I had 2 heads and said, "Nah, it's not Roscommon, I think it's Rossnowlagh". I toul him he was probably right.
What a gluebag.

He may a point HS, them south Donegal drivers are notoriously bad behind the wheel!

[The Real Laoislad]

Golf course dispute sends 1 man to hospital, 2 others to jail
May 31st, 2010 @ 9:50pm

PROVO -- Golf is known as a gentleman's game. But on Saturday morning in Provo, there were no gentlemen around.

In fact, there was no etiquette at all, as one golfer was taken to the hospital and two others went to jail.

Late Saturday morning, play on the Reserve at East Bay golf course in Provo turned violent over a dispute between two golfing parties about "playing through."


John Black, left, and Brice Williams, right, were arrested after the attacks.
According to Provo police, it happened at the tee box on hole No. 10 where a group thought they had permission from the course marshal to go ahead.

In the end, two of those golfers ended up under arrest.

Police say the two golfing parties started exchanging words, which escalated to a golf driver being used as a weapon.

All of the sudden, police dispatchers got a flood of 911 calls -- including one from each of the two men now under arrest -- asking for help.

Not only did the 41-year-old victim suffer what police said was a hematoma on his back, he sustained a puncture wound and abrasions to his thigh after the driver broke in half and was used as a blunt instrument.

The victim also reported he was punched several times.

John Black, 53, and Brice Williams, 59, were booked on charges of aggravated assault and disorderly conduct.

Police are not commenting about who may have started the altercation or if the victim became physical; it's all said to be under investigation.

There was a much more peaceful atmosphere at the course Monday afternoon, where golfers called the altercation unbelievable.

The pro at the Reserve at East Bay golf course declined to respond to Saturday's incident.

Because of the holiday, KSL could not get an update on the victim's condition.

And it has been an extra long weekend for the two men arrested. They were still in jail Monday night, waiting to see a judge. They'll get a bail hearing Tuesday morning

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=10990613

[JUst retired]

When they get out, can they go back to Tee box 10 to finish the round? Or will they  be charged again for  a new round? 

[Olly]

I bought a box of teabags this morning and nothing else, nothing at all apart from chewing gum. The woman asked "Do you want a bag?".

Unbelieveable, as if someone needs a bag to carry teabags in a box and chewing gum. I'll not be back and I told her that too. She was about 60 too.

[eggy bread]

Maybe she was offering you her daughter?

[Celt_Man]

I bought a box of teabags this morning and nothing else, nothing at all apart from chewing gum. The woman asked "Do you want a bag?".

Unbelieveable, as if someone needs a bag to carry teabags in a box and chewing gum. I'll not be back and I told her that too. She was about 60 too.

and I sure she'll be very upset about that fact too

[Olly]

No she held the bag up, almost forcing me to take it. All I could think about were the plastic rings you get around beer cans and sharks choking on them.

She has abolsutely no right to offer me a bag.

[hound of ulster]

I bought a box of teabags this morning and nothing else, nothing at all apart from chewing gum. The woman asked "Do you want a bag?".

Unbelieveable, as if someone needs a bag to carry teabags in a box and chewing gum. I'll not be back and I told her that too. She was about 60 too.

calm down,calm down