Depression

Started by Eamonnca1, October 25, 2013, 09:11:55 PM

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paddyjohn

The last few months have been a struggle for myself. Lost a very close friend to the Big C and its hit harder than I thought I would and a friend lost his father to suicide last weekend.

Thankfully there has been brighter days and after a few heavy sessions of chatting and talking later the spirits have lifted.

I always like to give this thread a bump and keep it going.

Insane Bolt

Quote from: paddyjohn on March 14, 2019, 04:57:52 PM
The last few months have been a struggle for myself. Lost a very close friend to the Big C and its hit harder than I thought I would and a friend lost his father to suicide last weekend.

Thankfully there has been brighter days and after a few heavy sessions of chatting and talking later the spirits have lifted.

I always like to give this thread a bump and keep it going.

Good man PJ. It's great that you are talking to others.

tbrick18

There's no words more true than "your health is your wealth".
If something in your life is having a detrimental effect on your health, then try to change what ever that is.
Should it be job, friends, being away from home....at the end of it all the only thing that really matters is health and family.
Everything else is just fluff around the edges to make you "feel" like you've achieved something or that you are living more comfortably. That's just an illusion if it effects your health.
In the past I've been guilty of working long hours or away from home to further my career or earn more money.
Some life events gave me a different outlook, now I priortise family first. No matter what.
I recently changed jobs and at the interview stage actually said, for me family would be first and if they had an issue with that not to offer me the job. They offered me the job and I've worked around family needs ever since. It was the best thing I ever said at an interview and my life is so much better for it.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, look at your priorities in life and see what's really important and decide what would de-stress you as much as possible. The money and status is not worth the stress and possible mental health problems that it can cost.

BarryBreensBandage

Very good show on BBC atm about mental health. With premier league footballers and Prince William. Should be on iplayer if missed tonight.
"Some people say I am indecisive..... maybe I am, maybe I'm not".

paddyjohn

Giving this a bump folks. The demons have hit with a big bang over the last 5 weeks. Sudden death of my mother has left me reeling.

My world is in absolute bits but I'll get there.

JohnDenver

Quote from: paddyjohn on June 10, 2019, 03:45:02 PM
Giving this a bump folks. The demons have hit with a big bang over the last 5 weeks. Sudden death of my mother has left me reeling.

My world is in absolute bits but I'll get there.

Sorry for your loss, PJ. There's no timeframe on these types of things as you well know, but the fact you have said and you know what i've highlighted in bold is a massive thing.

Things will get better, so just stick in there and take it one step at a time and do whatever, or speak to whoever that will you get through these dark days.

Insane Bolt

Quote from: paddyjohn on June 10, 2019, 03:45:02 PM
Giving this a bump folks. The demons have hit with a big bang over the last 5 weeks. Sudden death of my mother has left me reeling.

My world is in absolute bits but I'll get there.

Sorry for your loss. There's no easy fix coping with sudden death of a loved one. In my own experiences I found comfort in being surrounded by family and talking openly about my feelings. My kids gave me great comfort at the time as they depended on me. Grief is a process and it takes time.....but keep talking and as you say you will get there.

paddyjohn

Another bump folks. Keep talking and don't be scared to talk.

No problem is to big that can't be fixed.

tbrick18

Quote from: paddyjohn on September 05, 2019, 07:58:40 AM
Another bump folks. Keep talking and don't be scared to talk.

No problem is to big that can't be fixed.

I'd echo that 100%. Sorry for your loss PJ. Feeling low after something like that is to be expected and don't beat yourself up over it.
Keep talking and keep the head up.

Mrs Tbrick18 had some serious issues a few years back with post-natal depression. Really in the depths of despair, resulting in a prolonged hospital stay getting some quite extreme treatment. She had suicidal thoughts and had come close on a number of occasions, and I'll be honest, it affected my state of health too. I couldn't see her ever coming out of it.

However, its 10 years roughly now since then and she has not only survived but is no longer even on medication.
It has left its scars on the both of us, but if she can come through what she came through then it should give hope to anyone struggling on here that better days are ahead. Just persevere and exist until the cloud eventually slowly lifts.

paddyjohn

Terrible events in the Holylands this week.

Have a word folks..

brokencrossbar1

I heard over the weekend that an old school friend died by suicide. We knew each other for years but haven't had much contact since we left school. The tragedy of this is this is the third member of the same family to do this. His brother and mother died the same way, his brother the week my own mum died by suicide this time 7 years ago.  This time of the year is terrible for people who have any mental health issues. I have struggled myself and it's hard,  football saved my sanity for many years. Whatever is your 'fix' make sure you do it. Don't let it build, find your people, find your solace. I know what and where my people are and my solace is and it keeps me safe.

Also if you know anyone who may be isolated, lonely or maybe you think they need a friend just call in with a packet of biscuits and ask 'how's things?'  Don't let people be alone.

marty34

Quote from: brokencrossbar1 on October 21, 2019, 03:54:50 PM
I heard over the weekend that an old school friend died by suicide. We knew each other for years but haven't had much contact since we left school. The tragedy of this is this is the third member of the same family to do this. His brother and mother died the same way, his brother the week my own mum died by suicide this time 7 years ago.  This time of the year is terrible for people who have any mental health issues. I have struggled myself and it's hard,  football saved my sanity for many years. Whatever is your 'fix' make sure you do it. Don't let it build, find your people, find your solace. I know what and where my people are and my solace is and it keeps me safe.

Also if you know anyone who may be isolated, lonely or maybe you think they need a friend just call in with a packet of biscuits and ask 'how's things?'  Don't let people be alone.

Great words and advice BCB - keep busy at what you like.  Very important.

Don't let the dark clouds gather!

6th sam

Quote from: marty34 on October 21, 2019, 04:25:17 PM
Quote from: brokencrossbar1 on October 21, 2019, 03:54:50 PM
I heard over the weekend that an old school friend died by suicide. We knew each other for years but haven't had much contact since we left school. The tragedy of this is this is the third member of the same family to do this. His brother and mother died the same way, his brother the week my own mum died by suicide this time 7 years ago.  This time of the year is terrible for people who have any mental health issues. I have struggled myself and it's hard,  football saved my sanity for many years. Whatever is your 'fix' make sure you do it. Don't let it build, find your people, find your solace. I know what and where my people are and my solace is and it keeps me safe.

Also if you know anyone who may be isolated, lonely or maybe you think they need a friend just call in with a packet of biscuits and ask 'how's things?'  Don't let people be alone.

Great words and advice BCB - keep busy at what you like.  Very important.

Don't let the dark clouds gather!

Great advice, there's loads of people professional and otherwise keen to help , support and just be present👍

Eamonnca1

The clocks are going back soon, so this is a time to be extra vigilant. Keep an eye out for each other.

paddyjohn

Quote from: Eamonnca1 on October 21, 2019, 09:49:44 PM
The clocks are going back soon, so this is a time to be extra vigilant. Keep an eye out for each other.

Agree 100%. The dark nights are terrible.

My own mood has went to the depths again over the last few weeks. Really struggled somedays but I came through it.

talk talk talk....