Corny One for Friday

gawa316 · May 05, 2009, 03:37:41 PM

Quote from: ziggysego on May 05, 2009, 03:14:28 PM
Quote from: screenmachine on May 05, 2009, 03:04:13 PM
what a bunch of judger's? Let the man have a beer if he wants one, its not affecting anything you do, at least he's not drinking during the ceremony like the feckin priest! Wineo...

Doesn't affect me personally. I just pity the poor child. In one of the most important days of the young child's life, all she or he wants is a little love and attention of Dad. Imagine how upsetting it would be, to see Dad looking at his watch so he can make up the time in the pub.

I would say all they want is whatever confirmation money they can get their hands on

screenmachine · May 05, 2009, 03:51:56 PM

Quote from: ziggysego on May 05, 2009, 03:14:28 PM
Quote from: screenmachine on May 05, 2009, 03:04:13 PM
what a bunch of judger's? Let the man have a beer if he wants one, its not affecting anything you do, at least he's not drinking during the ceremony like the feckin priest! Wineo...

Doesn't affect me personally. I just pity the poor child. In one of the most important days of the young child's life, all she or he wants is a little love and attention of Dad. Imagine how upsetting it would be, to see Dad looking at his watch so he can make up the time in the pub.

I would imagine most of the children would be lookin at their watch and lookin out of there as well. I certainly don't think they would see the day as that important, I can't even remember mine tbh, what's that exciting about eating a bit of cardboard? I now understand what the eucharist is representing but I don't really think I could have understood the conception of God, Jesus and the body of Christ all being rolled into an edible object at the age of seven. Could you?
Or am I now going to hell?

Doogie Browser · May 05, 2009, 04:07:01 PM

Whats a Derry womans favourite wine?

"you're not going out the night again are ye?"

ziggysego · May 05, 2009, 04:24:23 PM

Quote from: screenmachine on May 05, 2009, 03:51:56 PM
Quote from: ziggysego on May 05, 2009, 03:14:28 PM
Quote from: screenmachine on May 05, 2009, 03:04:13 PM
what a bunch of judger's? Let the man have a beer if he wants one, its not affecting anything you do, at least he's not drinking during the ceremony like the feckin priest! Wineo...

Doesn't affect me personally. I just pity the poor child. In one of the most important days of the young child's life, all she or he wants is a little love and attention of Dad. Imagine how upsetting it would be, to see Dad looking at his watch so he can make up the time in the pub.

I would imagine most of the children would be lookin at their watch and lookin out of there as well. I certainly don't think they would see the day as that important, I can't even remember mine tbh, what's that exciting about eating a bit of cardboard? I now understand what the eucharist is representing but I don't really think I could have understood the conception of God, Jesus and the body of Christ all being rolled into an edible object at the age of seven. Could you?
Or am I now going to hell?

I remember both my First Confession, First Holy Communion and Confirmation days with each affection.

If you think that First Holy Communion is just about eating a bit of cardboard, well then I'm not a bit surprised you don't remember the day.

Still each to their own, I'm not one to preach.

naka · May 05, 2009, 04:37:01 PM

daughters holy communion on the 30th, wife had arranged for the 2 families to go out for a meal on the sunday til my wee lad( aged 6) pipes up, " i`m not going armagh are playing that day and i`m going to clones he made me proud as to where his allegiances lay
needless to say the family meal on the sunday has been postponed as duaghter is also going to clones

ziggysego · May 05, 2009, 04:44:03 PM

Quote from: naka on May 05, 2009, 04:37:01 PM
daughters holy communion on the 30th, wife had arranged for the 2 families to go out for a meal on the sunday til my wee lad( aged 6) pipes up, " i`m not going armagh are playing that day and i`m going to clones he made me proud as to where his allegiances lay
needless to say the family meal on the sunday has been postponed as duaghter is also going to clones

Orior · May 05, 2009, 07:42:21 PM

BEWARE Potential B&Q scam
==================

I'm not usually one for posting warnings about potential scams but I had a close call yesterday.

I walked into a B&Q hardware store at lunchtime and some old guy dressed in a black shirt with an orange apron on asked me if I wanted decking.

Fortunately, I got the first punch in and sorted the b*stard out. Those less suspecting might not be so lucky.

Pass this warning on

illdecide · May 06, 2009, 12:03:31 PM

The only cow in a small village of Redhills stopped giving milk. The

people did some research and found that they could buy a cow just across

in Monaghan for £200.

They brought the cow from Monaghan and the cow was wonderful. It produced

lots of milk all of the time, and the people were very happy.

They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow to produce more cows

like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again.

They bought the bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow.

However, whenever the bull tried to mount the cow, the cow would move

away.

No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the

bull and he could not succeed in his quest. The people were very upset and

decided to ask the local Vet, who was very wise, what to do.

They told the Vet what was happening. "Whenever the bull tires to mount

our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back,!
she moves

forward.

When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. An attempt from the

side, she walks away to the other side even when the bull tries ambush

tactics when the cow is asleep, it instantly wakes up and refuses any

advances."

The Vet thought about this for a minute and asked, "Did you by chance, buy

this cow in Monaghan?"

The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned where they

bought the cow. "You are truly a wise Vet," they said.

"How did you know we got the cow in Monaghan?"

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, "My wife is from

Monaghan."

Orior · May 06, 2009, 12:16:45 PM

lol

gerrykeegan · May 06, 2009, 12:53:57 PM

Police have confirmed that 2 Premiership footballers had their houses burgled on the same night. Ryan Giggs lost 70 Wales caps,10 premership medals 2 Champions League, 1 European cup winners, 5 FA Cup, 1 League Cup, 2 World club champions, 8 Charity shield and 1 Super cup medals. fernando torres has lost a kettle and a toaster.

illdecide · May 06, 2009, 12:55:04 PM

Newsflash...Police said a woman with diahorrea was analy raped by 4 men in a vintage car. Police said it was a shitty shitty gang bang.

I'll get my coat...

SidelineKick · May 06, 2009, 12:57:58 PM

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds?

There's twenty of them.

I'll get my coat and maybe hide for a while.

gerry · May 07, 2009, 01:54:16 AM

Max Mosley's son has died,
I cant afford Flowers, But Maybe i should
Have a WHIP round, Max would like that !

illdecide · May 07, 2009, 09:28:41 AM

What does Ricky Hatton & Gary Glitter have in common...?

They both went down after trying to take a little Phillipino in the ring

illdecide · May 07, 2009, 05:16:59 PM

Picture the scene. The Rangers dressing room before the old firm game and the players are about to get their team talk. "Right lads i want 100% commitment from the word go against these B***ards. Remember they are f**king Fenian's and are full of tattie-munching bog-trotters from the Emerald Isle. I don't care if you kick, punch or head butt your way to victory. Good luck and God save the Queen". Then Walter Smith walks in and says "Thanks ref, I'll take it from here".