Corny One for Friday

[Orior]

My dog is a terrible dancer, so I asked her "why can you not dance?".

And my dog replied "Well, I've got two left feet"

[5 Sams]

My dog is a terrible dancer, so I asked her "why can you not dance?".

And my dog replied "Well, I've got two left feet"

That's ruff

[armaghniac]

You expect to find left footers on a Gaa board.

[southdown]

When asked by a reporter if he was worried about having no Wayne, Roy Hodgson replied...

I haven't saw the forecast

[ziggy90]

That's a cwacker!!

[Mayo4Sam]

@FootballFunnys: Shay Given "Im quitting International football" Couldn't he have waited till after Euro 2012 instead of during the Spain match?

[Agent Orange]

@FootballFunnys: Shay Given "Im quitting International football" Couldn't he have waited till after Euro 2012 instead of during the Spain match?

You got up at 8 on a Sunday to post that? Have a lie in next week.

[laoislad]

I got a new step ladder today.

I only wish I had gotten to know my real ladder.

[Orior]

Q. What time did the Chinese man go to the dentist?

A. Two Thirty

[Maguire01]

Q. What time did the Chinese man go to the dentist?

A. Two Thirty

Why a Chinese man?

[Hardy]

Q. What time did the Chinese man go to the dentist?

A. Two Thirty

Why a Chinese man?

Probably. Who too.

[Shamrock Shore]

How do you know there is a ceili band at your door?

There are two knocks and then they all come in together!

[Onion Bag]

Golf Ethical Question

What if you were playing in the club championship tournament finals and
the match was halved at the end of 17 holes?

You had the honour and hit your ball a modest two hundred fifty yards
to the middle of the fairway, leaving a simple six iron to the pin.

Your opponent then hits his ball, lofting it deep into the woods to the
right of the fairway.

Being the golfing gentleman that you are, you help your opponent look
for his ball.

Just before the permitted five minute search period ends, your opponent
says: "Go ahead and hit your second shot and if I don't find it in
time, I'll concede the match."

You hit your ball, landing it on the green, stopping about ten feet
from the pin.

About the time your ball comes to rest, you hear your opponent exclaim
from deep in the woods: "I found it!".

The second sound you hear is a click, the sound of a club striking a
ball and the ball comes sailing out of the woods and lands on the
green, stopping no more than six inches from the hole.


Now here is the ethical dilemma:






Do you pull the cheating bastard's ball out of your pocket and confront
him with it or do you keep your mouth shut?

[southdown]

What does Terry Venables have in common with Essex girls?

Both prefer Seaman to Flowers.

[Gazzler]

Q. What time did the Chinese man go to the dentist?

A. Two Thirty

I don't get it.