Journalists who get it spot on...

[5 Sams]

Following on from the thread below about Kieran Shannon getting his timing wrong......


How on the money is Tom Humphries in this piece from the Times on Monday morning.....

LOCKERROOM: The men in green and gold could unpick their chains of torpor and stun city boys again, writes TOM HUMPHRIES

HARRY HOUDINI had a crippling fear of being undercut by cheap imitators and patented a lot of tricks and devices which he never got to perfect or to perform. The point for Houdini was neither did anybody else.

Once such manoeuvre involved the patenting of a watertight chest which would stand on four legs and into which Mr Houdini would be locked and chained. This chest would be lowered into a larger chest which would be locked and which would be filled with water.

Houdini would be dry and shackled within the first chest but surrounded on all sides by water. The trick would be to present himself on stage minutes later bone dry in the same clothes he had been wearing when entering the first chest.

There would be no evidence of tampering or of damage to either chest.

That trick is pretty much what Kerry will attempt to do this afternoon in Croke Park. And if they pull it off there are those who will point out that Tyrone did precisely the same thing with the same fall guys a year ago. That's the magical beauty of the championship.

On the one hand each matinee performance presents itself to the audience as two teams going hell for leather to escape the chains of the failure before they suffocate. On the other, each game is layered and textured and nuanced in ways we scarcely understand.

Kerry go to Croke Park looking as vulnerable as any Kerry team have looked to Dublin since perhaps the 1955-All Ireland final. At least that's what the audience thinks and that's what we pencil jockeys are saying. At least that's how it would be if Houdini's patented chest was just an ordinary chest and Houdini was just an ordinary fella. That's how it would be if it weren't for history and tradition and magic.

If Kerry beat Dublin today they will present themselves in the last four of the All-Ireland series as usual with no signs of struggle and with the applause of the wondrous populace ringing in their ears. Ta da! They may as well have sawn themselves in half into the bargain such has been the hysteria regarding their constrained performances through the qualifiers.

But a win, a dismantlement, say, of Dublin's full-back line and Kerry will be into an All-Ireland semi-final against Meath or Mayo and we will stroke our chins and say, oh, Kerry are Kerry.

Who knows if Kerry have that escapologist kick in them today but one thing is sure they will have enjoyed the theatrically diverting sight of the sky darkening with vultures this past week and had a little fun from parsing the sober ante-mortem words of the pundits.

Kerry need to ratchet things up a few degrees to spook Dublin but this is Croke Park and a full house. This is what Kerry do. Always have done. Being told they can't do it, that it is an impossibility, will have made them keen.

That's what makes this afternoon the entertainment that it is. You look at Kildare yesterday , survey the astonishing work done by Kieran McGeeney since that slapdown by Mick O'Dwyer a year ago and you consider how confidently Dublin handled the same Kildare team with just 14 men. You weigh that against Kerry's torrid summer and you say there can only be one outcome. Houdini dies in the box.

But our games ain't like that. Darragh Ó Sé has a great belief in the green and gold jersey being worth three to four points. So you factor that in. Against Dublin you certainly factor it in. You consider Gooch, Tommy Walsh, Declan O'Sullivan or whoever ends up at full forward will be a step up on anything Denis Bastick has been asked to deal with. You remember what Declan did to Bryan Cullen last time they played championship, you consider this is precisely the stage of the summer Kerry have made an art out of negotiating and Dublin have made a habit of falling at.

Suddenly you are biting your nails and wanting to take your money back. Suddenly it's a game that might go to the last 10 minutes, the last five. And you recall Clucko going walkabout against Kerry the last time and the Kerry fellas letting him come on and on till he had stranded himself. That's the fascination. That's the beauty of this afternoon, that's what makes it the quintessential Irish sporting occasion.

For all the talk which we Dubs enjoy about swagger and confidence and the boys in blue being an expression of our garrulous city, today is just another skirmish in our long and seemingly hopeless war for self-determination. A war which began in 1955 with the first real and pure city team to reach an All-Ireland final, the first Dublin side to take the imagination of the city by the lapels.

Dublin were beaten that day and apart from those crazy afternoons in 1976 and 1977 have been beaten by Kerry every time since. That's a crazy, illogical record when you think about it. This city with its resources and traditions and confidence has had to submit two well-nigh perfect football performances to see off a county whose mystical attachment to excellence in football is almost unexplainable to an outsider.

If Kerry with one bound end up in the All-Ireland semi-final today we won't ask questions. Dublin will have been patiently picking the locks and breaking the chains one by one while Kerry, who always retain the ability to land there dry and smiling, submit a performance that defies explanation.

That's football. That's the mystique of this quiet rural county that the big city boys can't get the measure of.

We were in Beijing this time last year when Tyrone dismantled Dublin, slipped from the waters of the qualifiers and straight into an All-Ireland semi-final, to be reassessed as the real deal and not the played-out rep company they had pretended to be for the previous three rounds.

The texts from various friends in Croke Park kept coming and coming that night, little epistles of gathering despair and hopelessness, the sadness turning to wonder at Tyrone's performance and how the Northerners had become in a few short years an even spookier prospect to play against than Kerry are.

I remember lying awake for the longest time trying to figure out what makes a Kerry or Kilkenny. What apart from the dry and all too easily transposable "structures" makes Tyrone suddenly invincible? The Chinese skies had no answer. Croke Park this afternoon might.

[bcarrier]

You consider Gooch, Tommy Walsh, Declan O'Sullivan or whoever ends up at full forward will be a step up on anything Denis Bastick has been asked to deal with. You remember what Declan did to Bryan Cullen last time they played championship, you consider this is precisely the stage of the summer Kerry have made an art out of negotiating and Dublin have made a habit of falling at.

A very fine call there.

(didnt like his rugby leaves me cold articles though).

[5 Sams]

..I dont think he gets much wrong here...

Franken-footballer



Vision/passing - Marty Clarke (Down)



The ultimate playmaker right now, and at 22 and with only one season under his belt, things will only get better. Not only has he a rare footballing intelligence that allows him to control the game, he has a left foot that allows him to turn vision into reality. Little wonder that in only his second start in Aussie Rules, the commentators noted of the Collingwood player: "On the back of this performance Qantas are going to sell a million tickets to Ireland. To recruiting agents." They'd have been wasting their time because there are few, if any, like him.




Back-up donors Declan O'Sullivan (Kerry), Stephen Cluxton (Dublin)



Strength - Pearse O'Neill (Cork)



Perhaps the best athlete in football, certainly the strongest, and of the few who could stand up to and occasionally halt Darragh Ó Sé in full tilt. Coming off a year where he never got on the front foot enough but even when so far from his best, his power in winning ball, holding ball and halting the opposition was consistently evident.




Back-up donors Eamonn Fennell (Dublin), Ciarán McKeever (Armagh)



High fielding - Kieran Donaghy (Kerry)



A sign of the post-Darragh/Whelan/ McGrane era that the best hands in the business belong to a player usually lodged on the edge of the square? Not quite. His 6'5" frame, strength, leap, soft hands and basketball background means he does more high-fielding than anyone else and he does it better than anyone else. His occasional move out to the middle may have to become more common if Kerry are to rise again. Back-up donors Aidan Walsh (Cork), Dermot Earley (Kildare)



Free-taking - Bryan Sheehan (Kerry)



He's added more to his game in recent months, but it's a sign of his deadball skills that Sheehan is keeping some much better open-play forwards out of this Kerry team. Can miss the occasional pressure kick, but the following link alone – http://vimeo.com/15831360 – will show why he beats the men listed below. Back-up donors Cian Ward (Meath), Donie Shine (Roscommon)



Pace - Paul Kerrigan (Cork)



"How can he run so fast with that arse," was the way it was subtly put outside Croke Park after the All Ireland. You won't find the answer here, just a tribute to a man no half-back can keep up with and who offers a Cork forward line built out of brawn something genuinely pleasing on the eye. And by that we mean pace! Back-up donors Keith Higgins (Mayo), Dennis Glennon (Westmeath)



Goal-scoring - Benny Coulter (Down)



The leading goalscorer in Ulster history. No fluke either. In his 41 championship games to date he's only kicked 46 points but has nailed 19 goals. Little wonder either, with that pace, power, finishing and a knack of being in the right place. Back-up donors Stevie McDonnell (Armagh), Alan Smith (Kildare)



Shooting accuracy - Bernard Brogan (Dublin)



Closing in on Gooch as the superstar of football. His ball-winning is more than impressive but it's a sign of his finishing that while often double-teamed in an ordinary forward line, he hit an amazing 4-25 from play last league and went on to average more than five points from play per game in summer. Remarkable stats from a man that doesn't miss much. Back-up donors Colm Cooper (Kerry), Joe Sheridan (Meath)



Breaking ball - Paul Galvin (Kerry)



It's a cliché, but it's only so trite because he does it so well. He's developed a remarkable physique and built such an aggression, that a player with no right to forage amongst much bigger men has developed a niche role amidst the literal giants of the game. Back-up donors Seamus Kenny (Meath), Tomás Ó Sé (Kerry)



Close control/Tricks - Colm Cooper (Kerry)



After the club final of 1992, Dr Crokes goalkeeper Peter O'Brien joked the only player to goal on him that day was a nine-year-old redhead. Nineteen years on and that mascot is the best about, thanks in part to his control and ability to beat a player off either side. Back-up donors Owen Mulligan (Tyrone), Leighton Glynn (Wicklow)



Defending - Marc Ó Sé (Kerry)



As unorthodox as he is effective, he goes against every rule when watching man rather than ball until the last second. His shadowing, ball-winning, blocking and ball-playing have been behind eight All Star nominations in nine seasons. Back-up donors Michael Shields (Cork), Rory O'Carroll (Dublin)



Drive - Tomás Ó Sé (Kerry)



Thirteen years after being cleaned out on his championship debut, he's still bounding up and down the line. But it's not just longevity that wins him the vote. Last summer he kicked two points in the draw with Cork, two in the Munster final, and his battle with Stephen Kelly, while unsavoury, shows it matters as much after five All Stars as it did when the mantelpiece was bare. Back-up donors Graham Canty (Cork), Brian Dooher (Tyrone)



Versatility - Joe McMahon (Tyrone)



In mid-August 2008 he was finishing a move that sluiced Dublin open. In late August 2008 he was winning aerial ball in midfield against Wexford. That September he restricted Tommy Walsh to a point. More recently he's been full-back. Far from a jack of all trades, he's a master of many. Back-up donors Dan Gordon (Down), Eamonn Callaghan (Kildare)



Composure - Dermot Earley (Kildare)



Never one to let the situation get the better of him and in 2010 we saw some of the best examples of his self-control and calming influence. A torn ligament meant he wasn't the box-to-box player of '09 but he still led those around him from the middle and from the touchline against Monaghan when, after being substituted, he talked Kildare through the closing stages. Plus, who will ever forget his cool-headed contribution on the day of his father's burial? Back-up donors Graham Canty (Cork), Colm Cooper (Kerry)

Ewan MacKenna
Sunday Tribune
January 16, 2011

[Jinxy]

Joe Sheridan would make bits of Pearse O'Neill.

[Joxer]

Pace wise I'd have Danny Hughes in there from Down.  Fastest man I've seen in a long time!

[ck]

Pace wise I'd have Danny Hughes in there from Down.  Fastest man I've seen in a long time!

Agree but James Loughrey of Antrim is possibly the fastest player in the modern game. Read somewhere that he was a sprinter in his youth. I saw him burn Barry Dunnion of Donegal, and Dunnion is a flyer.

[Brick Tamlin]

Yer man Tony Scullion from Antrim is no slouch either.

[Minder]

Who is the blonde fella that plays for Limerick? He is as fast as I have seen

[Simon Says]

sean kelly of st galls and antrim is the fastest player in the game at the minute.

[Minder]

sean kelly of st galls and antrim is the fastest player in the game at the minute.

He wouldn't even be close to it.

[brokencrossbar1]

You know it's the slow part of the year when meaningless, nonsensical lists are spewed out by journalists.

[ApresMatch]

sean kelly of st galls and antrim is the fastest player in the game at the minute.

Are you havin a giraffe?
Danny Hughes very quick, Declan Mullan from Derry is very quick also

[the colonel]

Yer man Tony Scullion from Antrim is no slouch either.

The TS express as Sidebottom referred to him as

[Two Hands FFS]

Who is the blonde fella that plays for Limerick? He is as fast as I have seen

Stephen Kelly I think. Does he not play Rugby as well?? Very Quick

Cathal Naughton for the Cork Hurlers is a flying machine. Never seen anyone who can so quick with the ball on his stick..unreal

[Minder]

Who is the blonde fella that plays for Limerick? He is as fast as I have seen

Stephen Kelly I think. Does he not play Rugby as well?? Very Quick

Cathal Naughton for the Cork Hurlers is a flying machine. Never seen anyone who can so quick with the ball on his stick..unreal

The very one, that was annoying me !