The Official Daddies Club

Started by Under Lights, July 09, 2014, 09:02:06 AM

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nrico2006

I was in favour of the crying it out method but the woman never let me persevere with it.  Have a wee girl who still would wake up at nights calling for me and I would go in and technically miss about 1 minute of sleep.  The wee boy sleeps all through.  The wee girl never seemed to be teething, but the wee boy was a nightmare and there were periods of weeks where it did affect his sleeping routine.  He also had cows milk allergy and refused to eat for a long time, thankfully his hunger got the better of him and he started eating away at about 29 weeks.  I agree that the non eating craic is one of the most stressful things.  Hate when they are sick, he went through a few days of sickness 6 months ago and didnt eat, literally lost half his body weight and was like a bag of bones - scary stuff.   
'To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal, light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle.'

Brick Tamlin

Wee girl was struggling to sleep in her cot and wouldn't settle throughout the night. She would stand up and cry, screetch etc.
What worked for us was when I went in and lay on the floor beside her cot and talked away to her, sang(badly), played a wee bit of music on my phone.
She would eventually sit back down or lie back down in the cot.
Basically I tried to comfort her that I was still there . She would love this and roll round to face me in her cot and eventually she would tire and fall asleep. some nights took longer than others but it got her into a pattern. I didn't do it every night but now and again.

We also had to persevere through constant screetching and crying at times. Its worth it if you can hack it. You have to be strong and not allow yourself to give in and go and lift her.
Child will only cry so much before tiring and wanna sleep. If she were coughing and splutterin then id be up and over outside the door ready to pounce.

The Bearded One

Haven't really had any issues with the children waking during the night but did experience problems when putting them up to bed. I was in favour of letting them cry whereas my wife was horrified by this approach, eventually we met in the middle and would have let them cry to a point before going into them. We found that after a period of crying/hysterics the child got so tired a small bit of rocking got them over.

Regards eating, this was one of the most stressful things we encountered and caused no end of arguments between my wife and I. One of our children more or less went off her food overnight. Went from eating anything that was put on the plate to being unbelievably picky - it was as if we had a new child. At the time she was constantly 'bunged up' so we thought that was the problem, when that was resolved (Lactose Solution as advised by GP) the eating didn't improve. Ended up having to take her to a Dietician twice.

Advice given was to let her eat the things she likes throughout the day (cereal, toast, yogurts, breadsticks, fruit) and every evening put her dinner out in front of her. If she doesn't eat it, lift the plate and leave it at that. Whatever you do, avoid confrontation and making a big issue out of it. introduce things like rice and pasta which are pretty tasteless to start. Fish fingers, plain chicken. Avoid gravy, sauces etc. Gradually we made a breakthrough and now she will eat most things, still an odd issue here and there but nothing we worry about.
It is what it is. Presumably.

God14

Tis a good thread this. I am to become a father for the first time at the end of August, very excited but nervous too. I honestly think im dreading the childbirth more than my Wife! Anyhow i'll post / review things on here as I come across them

ONeill

Myself and herself were brutal with the twins. If they cried and there wasn't anything needing changed and they looked OK then it was cry yer hearts out yiz whingers. Hard to listen to but you eventually use the sound of their crying as a sleep comfort rhythm. Definitely worked and at 6 months they were crawling into the cots themselves and turning the light out at 6.

The downside is now. They're 8 and they're out and about without us and won't even sit in the same room. It's like being 69 at 39. We now cry at night.
I wanna have my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames.

deiseach

Quote from: God14 on July 09, 2014, 12:11:26 PM
Tis a good thread this. I am to become a father for the first time at the end of August, very excited but nervous too. I honestly think im dreading the childbirth more than my Wife! Anyhow i'll post / review things on here as I come across them

That'll change...

Under Lights

#21
Quote from: God14 on July 09, 2014, 12:11:26 PM
Tis a good thread this. I am to become a father for the first time at the end of August, very excited but nervous too. I honestly think im dreading the childbirth more than my Wife! Anyhow i'll post / review things on here as I come across them

Childbirth was the second worst experience of my life to date but it is certainly the best end product.

My wife went 10 days over. She was very anxious, restless and most of all uncomfortable, a size 8 girl carrying a near 10 pound baby.
I took the day off that we were to get called in to be 'started', wife was experiencing a lot of pains the night before so we were expecting to go in before that.
Rang the hospital- they told us not to come in unless she was 'well gone' but they would call us back whenever they had space to start her.
We waited. Around 1pm we got that call. I answered. 'We have space available now, tell Sarah to come on in now'.
'My wife's name is XXXX not Sarah'
'Oh. I think I've the wrong number, you's are further down the list.'
A distraught woman.

We got called in a few hours later. Valentines day it was. My stomach in bits. We were brought into a private bay-same for everyone. TV on, Liverpool and Spurs were both playing in Europa league that night. Happy enough this will relax me a bit. They go through bits and pieces with wife. Examined her.  She took a bath. Very uncomfortable. She came back to the bay. They brought tea and toast. I couldn't eat.

At around 11pm we were moved to a theatre. My legs weak. Wife was in a bed and I had a soft seat by her bedside. We had decided on a epidural as pain relief as we know it was a big baby. She got the injection in her spine. She laboured. The epidural hadn't taken down one side feeling the pain. I prayed. She laboured during the night she sucked on gas and air regularly but was asleep despite getting contractions every minute where she squeezed my hand to death- she doesn't remember any of this today.
7am came. Nurse told me to go get breakfast. I went to the canteen. Got a sausage and a piece of potato bread and a lucozade. I relieved my bowels a lot in this time out.
I went back to base. Few hours later Nurse told me the child hadn't moved in 4 hours. We would have to go for a section. I made a call to the wifes mum to let her know what was happening (we would have elected a section knowing the size of a child but they were insistent in her trying). They took my wife away from me while I got ready to go into the theatre with them (robes on etc). I prayed.
The screen was up and I talked to my wife and held her hand while they pulled and dragged at her. A cry. 'It's a big girl, a big GIRL'. I was convinced boy with the size. They showed her to us before taking her away to get cleaned and wrapped in towel. Mum got a hold, then me. They then had to take mum to sewn her up.

Myself and the baby were moved to recovery where I was left alone with her. My baby. The wife joined us moments later.
I breathed for the first time in hours.






laoislad

Great story Under Lights.
We prefer to do things a bit quicker.
2nd baby born 12 weeks ago. Got to the hospital at 8.50am baby was born 24mins later.! No time for epidural. No waiting around the baby was coming and that was that.
Easy.... 8)
When you think you're fucked you're only about 40% fucked.

God14

Quote from: laoislad on July 09, 2014, 01:07:54 PM
Great story Under Lights.
We prefer to do things a bit quicker.
2nd baby born 12 weeks ago. Got to the hospital at 8.50am baby was born 24mins later.! No time for epidural. No waiting around the baby was coming and that was that.
Easy.... 8)

Twas indeed but it certainly hasn't eased my apprehension!

Under Lights

Quote from: laoislad on July 09, 2014, 01:07:54 PM
Great story Under Lights.
We prefer to do things a bit quicker.
2nd baby born 12 weeks ago. Got to the hospital at 8.50am baby was born 24mins later.! No time for epidural. No waiting around the baby was coming and that was that.
Easy.... 8)

Class. Next time for us it will probably just be a section for us. Knocked the wife off her feet for a full two weeks.

The Bearded One

Quote from: God14 on July 09, 2014, 01:10:30 PM
Quote from: laoislad on July 09, 2014, 01:07:54 PM
Great story Under Lights.
We prefer to do things a bit quicker.
2nd baby born 12 weeks ago. Got to the hospital at 8.50am baby was born 24mins later.! No time for epidural. No waiting around the baby was coming and that was that.
Easy.... 8)

Twas indeed but it certainly hasn't eased my apprehension!

Every experience will be different, impossible to prepare yourself for what's ahead. I have had 2 fairly straight forward visits to the delivery suite thankfully. Reasonably short labour and no real issues afterwards.
It is what it is. Presumably.

tbrick18

With 5 kids we've been through most of what everyone has already said on here.

Our first pregnancy ended in a suspected miscarriage when we were on holiday, only for us to discover when we came home that she was still pregnant and on admission to hospital be told it was an ectopic pregnancy (where the baby is growing in the fallopian tube) and would abort itself. We waiting 10 days in hospital for a natural abort which never happened whilst my wifes health deteriorated due to internal bleeding. Eventual surgery left us in the position of being told it would be unlikely for us to be able to have children due to the damage done.

Stressful.

So we went to a private gynaecologist consultant who specialised in fertility, got on treatment and eventually the IVF waiting list...when out of the blue my wife became pregnant. The pregancy went smooth and a natural (scheduled) birth produced a baby girl.

Happy!

However, my wife quickly developed post natal depression and it was quite severe.

Stress again!

Treatment for that eventually worked and a 2nd pregnancy came quite quickly and ran smoothly until or 2nd was born, a baby boy. Everyone well for once, even though the post natal crept back but we were prepared this time.

Stressful but manageable.

Then a 3rd pregnancy came along, whilst she was on the pill. It seems the treatment for the post natal had counteracted the pill and so we were expecting number 3. This pregnancy was difficult as my wife had to come off her meds and the depression really took hold. A few near death experiences ensued and we were lucky to get through it, then we discovered the baby was breach and had to be delivered by c-section.
The baby girl was well, my wife wasnt. We now had 3 kids under 3 years old and my wife finished up admitted to hospital. She was severely ill. I finished up taking a year off work to mind the kids and tend to the Mrs who spend several months in hospital.
Eventually she got home and slowly things got better, but our new baby had severe reflux and spent a lot of time in and out of hospital.

Again more stressful.

But over time it all improved and my wife got back to herself (more or less) and after about a year and a half our youngest started to come out of the reflux and we decided it was too risky to have more kids.

Fast forward another year, and out of the blue my wife finds she's pregnant again!

Holy f**K!

Stress x 1000.

Not knowing how she would be, and not knowing how we'd cope with another kid. We went back to our consultant as we had with the others, to be told we were having twins.

Stress x 10000000000000

Just as we were getting used to the idea, and the Mrs's health was holding out, we were told there were problems, twin-to-twin syndrome where one of the twins is getting all the nutrients. As the twins were identical, they shared bloods supplies so if the weaker twin was not to survive neither would survive.

Stress through the roof.

We had scans and tests at the royal 3 times a week until 31 weeks we were told we needed immediate delivery.

Both boys born by section, after losing their heart rates several times. 2lb2 and 2lb4.
About 30 people in delivery theatre expecting the worse, only for everything to be reasonably good. Both breathing on their own, very small but reasonably healty.
The next 6 weeks was a blur in neo-natal with blood transfusions, surgeries, and too many things to mention but eventually everyone got home and everyone is well.

Now almost 2 years later we have twin terrors, one of which still gets up every night and wakes us all. But it could have been worse.

With our older kids we used the controlled crying technique and it worked.

With twins its harder as you dont want one to wake the other but they'll eventually grow out of it (I hope).

So now we've got an 8 year old girl, a 6 year old boy, a 5 year old girl and twin 2 year old boys.

I'm more stressed than ever, but sure I wouldnt change a thing.

laoislad

You should probably tie a knot in it now tbrick.
Great story glad everything worked out OK.
A friend of ours went through post natal depression,it wasn't pretty and I'd say she isn't the same person she was before tbh.
When you think you're fucked you're only about 40% fucked.

glens abu

Quote from: tbrick18 on July 09, 2014, 02:31:54 PM
With 5 kids we've been through most of what everyone has already said on here.

Our first pregnancy ended in a suspected miscarriage when we were on holiday, only for us to discover when we came home that she was still pregnant and on admission to hospital be told it was an ectopic pregnancy (where the baby is growing in the fallopian tube) and would abort itself. We waiting 10 days in hospital for a natural abort which never happened whilst my wifes health deteriorated due to internal bleeding. Eventual surgery left us in the position of being told it would be unlikely for us to be able to have children due to the damage done.

Stressful.

So we went to a private gynaecologist consultant who specialised in fertility, got on treatment and eventually the IVF waiting list...when out of the blue my wife became pregnant. The pregancy went smooth and a natural (scheduled) birth produced a baby girl.

Happy!

However, my wife quickly developed post natal depression and it was quite severe.

Stress again!

Treatment for that eventually worked and a 2nd pregnancy came quite quickly and ran smoothly until or 2nd was born, a baby boy. Everyone well for once, even though the post natal crept back but we were prepared this time.

Stressful but manageable.

Then a 3rd pregnancy came along, whilst she was on the pill. It seems the treatment for the post natal had counteracted the pill and so we were expecting number 3. This pregnancy was difficult as my wife had to come off her meds and the depression really took hold. A few near death experiences ensued and we were lucky to get through it, then we discovered the baby was breach and had to be delivered by c-section.
The baby girl was well, my wife wasnt. We now had 3 kids under 3 years old and my wife finished up admitted to hospital. She was severely ill. I finished up taking a year off work to mind the kids and tend to the Mrs who spend several months in hospital.
Eventually she got home and slowly things got better, but our new baby had severe reflux and spent a lot of time in and out of hospital.

Again more stressful.

But over time it all improved and my wife got back to herself (more or less) and after about a year and a half our youngest started to come out of the reflux and we decided it was too risky to have more kids.

Fast forward another year, and out of the blue my wife finds she's pregnant again!

Holy f**K!

Stress x 1000.

Not knowing how she would be, and not knowing how we'd cope with another kid. We went back to our consultant as we had with the others, to be told we were having twins.

Stress x 10000000000000

Just as we were getting used to the idea, and the Mrs's health was holding out, we were told there were problems, twin-to-twin syndrome where one of the twins is getting all the nutrients. As the twins were identical, they shared bloods supplies so if the weaker twin was not to survive neither would survive.

Stress through the roof.

We had scans and tests at the royal 3 times a week until 31 weeks we were told we needed immediate delivery.

Both boys born by section, after losing their heart rates several times. 2lb2 and 2lb4.
About 30 people in delivery theatre expecting the worse, only for everything to be reasonably good. Both breathing on their own, very small but reasonably healty.
The next 6 weeks was a blur in neo-natal with blood transfusions, surgeries, and too many things to mention but eventually everyone got home and everyone is well.

Now almost 2 years later we have twin terrors, one of which still gets up every night and wakes us all. But it could have been worse.

With our older kids we used the controlled crying technique and it worked.

With twins its harder as you dont want one to wake the other but they'll eventually grow out of it (I hope).

So now we've got an 8 year old girl, a 6 year old boy, a 5 year old girl and twin 2 year old boys.

I'm more stressed than ever, but sure I wouldnt change a thing.

Stressed just reading that,great story and wish you and your family good health.

BenDover

Quote from: Under Lights on July 09, 2014, 12:58:33 PM
Quote from: God14 on July 09, 2014, 12:11:26 PM
Tis a good thread this. I am to become a father for the first time at the end of August, very excited but nervous too. I honestly think im dreading the childbirth more than my Wife! Anyhow i'll post / review things on here as I come across them

Childbirth was the second worst experience of my life to date but it is certainly the best end product.

My wife went 10 days over. She was very anxious, restless and most of all uncomfortable, a size 8 girl carrying a near 10 pound baby.
I took the day off that we were to get called in to be 'started', wife was experiencing a lot of pains the night before so we were expecting to go in before that.
Rang the hospital- they told us not to come in unless she was 'well gone' but they would call us back whenever they had space to start her.
We waited. Around 1pm we got that call. I answered. 'We have space available now, tell Sarah to come on in now'.
'My wife's name is XXXX not Sarah'
'Oh. I think I've the wrong number, you's are further down the list.'
A distraught woman.

We got called in a few hours later. Valentines day it was. My stomach in bits. We were brought into a private bay-same for everyone. TV on, Liverpool and Spurs were both playing in Europa league that night. Happy enough this will relax me a bit. They go through bits and pieces with wife. Examined her.  She took a bath. Very uncomfortable. She came back to the bay. They brought tea and toast. I couldn't eat.

At around 11pm we were moved to a theatre. My legs weak. Wife was in a bed and I had a soft seat by her bedside. We had decided on a epidural as pain relief as we know it was a big baby. She got the injection in her spine. She laboured. The epidural hadn't taken down one side feeling the pain. I prayed. She laboured during the night she sucked on gas and air regularly but was asleep despite getting contractions every minute where she squeezed my hand to death- she doesn't remember any of this today.
7am came. Nurse told me to go get breakfast. I went to the canteen. Got a sausage and a piece of potato bread and a lucozade. I relieved my bowels a lot in this time out.
I went back to base. Few hours later Nurse told me the child hadn't moved in 4 hours. We would have to go for a section. I made a call to the wifes mum to let her know what was happening (we would have elected a section knowing the size of a child but they were insistent in her trying). They took my wife away from me while I got ready to go into the theatre with them (robes on etc). I prayed.
The screen was up and I talked to my wife and held her hand while they pulled and dragged at her. A cry. 'It's a big girl, a big GIRL'. I was convinced boy with the size. They showed her to us before taking her away to get cleaned and wrapped in towel. Mum got a hold, then me. They then had to take mum to sewn her up.

Myself and the baby were moved to recovery where I was left alone with her. My baby. The wife joined us moments later.
I breathed for the first time in hours.
My wifes had 2 sections, little did I know the 2nd time they'd took her away to prep her and give the epidural only until an emergency landed to the delivery suite and the team due to section my wife had to leave her to attend to this other woman. All the while I hadn't clue what was going on just keeping thinking it didn't take this long before I was in operating room beside her the last time. Most nervous wait of my life - scary shit sat in a hospital room on your own while the OH is away to get an epidural.

Good luck - the first few nappies are pleasant but it gets easier  :)