Sheer Perfection...

[Hurler on the Bitch]

I was sitting last weekend outside a bar / cafe on a hillside overlooking Florence. The better half was having a glass of wine, while had a rather large, cold and frothy beer in front of me. The sun was setting over the hilltops on the far side. Two excellent pizzas arrived and we sat and chilled as the evening descended. Now I'm back in dear old Ireland, back at work and have no leave left. But I just thought, what sheer perfection that evening was - anybody beat that?

[Hurler on the Bitch]

Sorry forgot to add... then the wife and I went back to the hotel, up to our room and she gave me the mosty magnificent .......pair of pyjamas that she had packed away for me. Then as I was getting undressed, she came up behind me a placed her hand on my ....glasses which had fallen to the floor. So as she was bent over getting my glasses, I just couldn't resist the temptation, so I got out my huge... bag of chrisps that I had taken from the pub etc etc...

[Balboa]

I would say closer to the truth would be.....last weekend you were in your ma's house (cos you still live at home), you had a pot noodle bewtween pulling the balls of yourself over a copy of FHM.

[Hurler on the Bitch]

Bit close to the truth that one - However, I was in Tuscany, and, for you to have such a vivid imagination, I think it's a case of "he doth protest too much" - meaning that there must be an element of yourself in what you accuse me of!

[his holiness nb]

I'd be very careful with that pot noodle, could give yourself a nasty scald 

[Fiodoir Ard Mhacha]

Reminds me...

Man goes to doctor.

Man: Doctor, I've got an orange dick.

Doc: Let's have a look. ....By God, you do. What sort of work do you do - does it involve chemicals?

Man: No, I don't work.

Doc: So what do you do all day?

Man: Eat wotsits and watch porn.

[Long time dead]

I would say closer to the truth would be.....last weekend you were in your ma's house (cos you still live at home), you had a pot noodle bewtween pulling the balls of yourself over a copy of FHM.

[Goin Down]

I like to think that I perfect my work, do ye? 

[pintsofguinness]

I'd be very careful with that pot noodle, could give yourself a nasty scald 

That's not all you've to be careful with...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2503291.stm

A Swedish scientist who rested his laptop computer on his lap for just an hour needed medical treatment for extensive blistering.

A concerned doctor wrote to The Lancet medical journal after encountering the distressed patient.

He is warning the public of the potential dangers of using a laptop "in the literal sense".

The 50-year-old father-of-two used the laptop machine, of unknown origin, to write a report while sitting in an armchair.

Dr Claes-Goran Ostenson, from Sweden's Karolinska Institute, told the journal: "He had placed his laptop computer on his lap while writing for about one hour.

"The next day he noticed irritation."

Infection

The irration of his penis and scrotum led to blisters, one with a diameter of 2cm.

Dr Ostenson said: "The patient recalled that, while sitting two days earlier with his computer on his lap, he occasionally had felt heat and a burning feeling on his lap and thigh."

Unfortunately for the victim, the blisters broke and developed into infected suppurating wounds.

The manual of the computer concerned told users not to allow the laptop to rest directly onto skin, warning: "With extended operation, heat can potentially build up in the base.

"Allowing sustained contact with the skin could cause discomfort or, eventually, a burn."

However, the patient in this case insisted he had been wearing both trousers and underpants at the time.
(Course you were)

[The Real Laoislad]

Sheer Perfection.........

Lying on the couch finished work for the week,Watching the Golf with another 4 hours of it to go  and a Domions Texas BBQ pizza on the way!

[his holiness nb]

Sheer Perfection.........

Lying on the couch finished work for the week,Watching the Golf with another 4 hours of it to go  and a Domions Texas BBQ pizza on the way!

pulling the stomach of yourself to your avatar 

*mind them laptop burns