"Ah crap" moments

[Tony Baloney]

When you text someone slagging someone off but actually send it to the very person you were slagging.

I know two clowns who did the same at work except by email. A very dangerous game!

[Hurler on the Bitch]

When you text someone slagging someone off but actually send it to the very person you were slagging.

I know two clowns who did the same at work except by email. A very dangerous game!

So ... anyway, here's me trying to explain to the wife that my 'errecctionnn'.... etc

[stiffler]

Sparkling water falls under the wtf banner for me. Don't know how anyone stomachs normal sparkling water although some of the flavoured stuff is passable.

good for a hangover!

[Green Grass]

Or on the other side of the coin, when you receive a text message/email from someone not meant for you, talking about you.

[Rav67]

Had a bad one of these today.  Had to call an see an oul woman to do with work, after the meeting I needed to copy her passport so that was alright I took it put it inside my folder and said I'd leave it back in a few days.  Back at the office it wasn't there but I assumed I must've forgotten to pick it up from her table.  Then about 5 o'clock her son calls to speak to me, says the passport was found half way up the road by a neighbour, I must've dropped it I was putting the folder in the car.  The chap was far from pleased and can't see the boss being too happy when he hears about it tomorrow. 

[Main Street]

I was looking for some white spirit, I saw a likely container under the bathroom sink, unscrewed the lid and moved it up into the general direction of my nose.
I couldn't get a smell and decided just to stick my nose very close to the neck, sucking hard through my nose.
Nothing could have prepared me for that pure blast of Ammonia.
I was literaly knocked of my feet, my whole head exploding while my brain went to mush.
Not the most stupid thing I have done, but this is just an "Ah crap" moment thread.

[PadraicHenryPearse]

Rag week when i was a 1st year down in Waterford. Very drunk so leave the nightclub and go downstairs to the bar area as its easier access to the jacks and quicker to get served another pint. There was only two lads down in the bar, i grab a pint and start to chat to them. A minute later this really attractive asia girl, tall slim everything right about (heard she got a modelling gig and left college some time after) walked by us into the toilets.

Que, "sucky sucky 5 dollar" "me love you long time" "oh handsome man" etc. etc. I am in the middle of saying sucky sucky and i look up and she is staring at me as she walks by. AH CRAP...

I did go up to her later that night and say sorry and ended up with her that night, the worst thing was she had a terrible Limerick accent, awful.... i was probably the only one who would go over with her after hearing it but i was very very drunk

[JUst retired]

Does any one remember the Roscommon " incident" a few years ago. Well I was umpireing at a game between Galway and Roscommon in Tuam. A rather loose tackle occured further up the field( for loose read dirty) The Galway keeper said to me, Umpire did you see who that was,
I said yes but I would`nt recognise him with his clothes on! the golkeeper then said f++k up one of them is standing on the front of the square. It was a totally spontaneous thing I said, not planned or anything, but I thought it was funny.

[High Wide and Handsome]

Not to do with GAA but was in the builders yard yesterday gaetting bonding and skimming beads etc. The man in the yard started asking me if they were the right beads, I said aye. He went to lift a few of them and dropped one. Looking at his own hand I thought he had cut his hand. I being the tool said, "f**k watch them things hi, they would cut the finger clean off ye!" When he then handed me the beads I realsied he only had half a thumb. Not a nice feeling!

[rolloutking]

Was in America recently. Got chatting to some bird in a nightclub. She asked me what I did and I said I'm a dentist. She replied  "oh mw gaaad....no waay man...im a dental assistant.....I thought to myself ah f**k, im rumbled.

[Larry Duff]

Was in America recently. Got chatting to some bird in a nightclub. She asked me what I did and I said I'm a dentist. She replied  "oh mw gaaad....no waay man...im a dental assistant.....I thought to myself ah f**k, im rumbled.

Christ! What is your real job when the best lie you think of to impress a woman is claiming to be a dentist

[tyssam5]

Was in America recently. Got chatting to some bird in a nightclub. She asked me what I did and I said I'm a dentist. She replied  "oh mw gaaad....no waay man...im a dental assistant.....I thought to myself ah f**k, im rumbled.

So did you get action or not?

[thebandit]

Note sure where to put this, so I'll start a new thread.

Yesterday I took a swig of a bottle of 7-Up from the fridge. Well, I thought it was 7-Up, only it turned out to be some carbonated water crap which the wife drinks.

I'm sure Muppet has done something similar.

I know a boy who did the same only it was petrol in the bottle!!!

[ONeill]

Was munching on a packet of pretzels last month. Got to the end and, a la a packet of crisps, went to empty the remains of the packet into me gob. Got half a pound of salt. Couldn't get rid of the taste for 2 days and still can't face the pretzel.

[Puckoon]

Getting caught on auto pilot with the woman...

"I love your balls" says she
"I love yours too" says he.

Ah crap.