Mid life crisis

[quit yo jibbajabba]

5) some form of livestock

*syferus only option

[Boycey]

We should do a poll. Is your partner:

1) a daughter of Satan
2) high maintenance
3) easy going
4) missing in action

Mine is definitely 2, mind you she will probably tell you and am far too easy going (which I am) to the point that it has held me back in life..

[seafoid]

Stop reading how great some cnut's life is on Facebook and tell your wife to do the same. Their life is as big a pile a ballix as yours. They just don't put that on Facebook.

You could write a book on that theme and go on the Ellen show, Hardstation. You'd never look back

[tintin25]

I'm 40 in November. Life can be very stressful at times but I wouldn't say I'm having a mid life crisis or anything yet. Marriage is good,work is good, don't have many regrets at all apart from wishing I had lived in a different country for 5 or 6 years, that would have been nice. Spent a year drinking and riding in Australia but that doesn't really count.
How do you know you're having a midlife crisis anyway?

On marriage,It is sad people break-up after a couple of years. The wife's brother and his (ex)wife only lasted 7 months.
I think alot of couples get caught up in the actual wedding itself. Sure some are planning it for a couple of years and it takes over their life. Then it's all over and reality hits home.
It's one thing being boyfriend and girlfriend but being married is a whole different kettle of fish.
I tell the wife everyday how lucky she is to have me, we're married 8 years so I like to think it's working.

What changes though?  Most couples are generally living together anyway and some already have kids.  I agree facebook and the like doesn't help, 'oh look, their life/marriage seems perfect and far better than ours, so there must be something wrong'.  Think it dawns on some people that they were never actually in love with the OH in the first place.

[Milltown Row2]

I'm 40 in November. Life can be very stressful at times but I wouldn't say I'm having a mid life crisis or anything yet. Marriage is good,work is good, don't have many regrets at all apart from wishing I had lived in a different country for 5 or 6 years, that would have been nice. Spent a year drinking and riding in Australia but that doesn't really count.
How do you know you're having a midlife crisis anyway?

On marriage,It is sad people break-up after a couple of years. The wife's brother and his (ex)wife only lasted 7 months.
I think alot of couples get caught up in the actual wedding itself. Sure some are planning it for a couple of years and it takes over their life. Then it's all over and reality hits home.
It's one thing being boyfriend and girlfriend but being married is a whole different kettle of fish.
I tell the wife everyday how lucky she is to have me, we're married 8 years so I like to think it's working.

What changes though?  Most couples are generally living together anyway and some already have kids.  I agree facebook and the like doesn't help, 'oh look, their life/marriage seems perfect and far better than ours, so there must be something wrong'.  Think it dawns on some people that they were never actually in love with the OH in the first place.

Facebook?? Ffs! People go through this who aren't on Facebook and went through it before Facebook! And anyone who looks at a friends Facebook page and envies it wants a good slap ! And probably shouldn't be married!

[haranguerer]

I'm 40 in November. Life can be very stressful at times but I wouldn't say I'm having a mid life crisis or anything yet. Marriage is good,work is good, don't have many regrets at all apart from wishing I had lived in a different country for 5 or 6 years, that would have been nice. Spent a year drinking and riding in Australia but that doesn't really count.
How do you know you're having a midlife crisis anyway?

On marriage,It is sad people break-up after a couple of years. The wife's brother and his (ex)wife only lasted 7 months.
I think alot of couples get caught up in the actual wedding itself. Sure some are planning it for a couple of years and it takes over their life. Then it's all over and reality hits home.
It's one thing being boyfriend and girlfriend but being married is a whole different kettle of fish.
I tell the wife everyday how lucky she is to have me, we're married 8 years so I like to think it's working.

What changes though?  Most couples are generally living together anyway and some already have kids.  I agree facebook and the like doesn't help, 'oh look, their life/marriage seems perfect and far better than ours, so there must be something wrong'.  Think it dawns on some people that they were never actually in love with the OH in the first place.

Nothing changes

[The Iceman]

I'm 40 in November. Life can be very stressful at times but I wouldn't say I'm having a mid life crisis or anything yet. Marriage is good,work is good, don't have many regrets at all apart from wishing I had lived in a different country for 5 or 6 years, that would have been nice. Spent a year drinking and riding in Australia but that doesn't really count.
How do you know you're having a midlife crisis anyway?

On marriage,It is sad people break-up after a couple of years. The wife's brother and his (ex)wife only lasted 7 months.
I think alot of couples get caught up in the actual wedding itself. Sure some are planning it for a couple of years and it takes over their life. Then it's all over and reality hits home.
It's one thing being boyfriend and girlfriend but being married is a whole different kettle of fish.
I tell the wife everyday how lucky she is to have me, we're married 8 years so I like to think it's working.

What changes though?  Most couples are generally living together anyway and some already have kids.  I agree facebook and the like doesn't help, 'oh look, their life/marriage seems perfect and far better than ours, so there must be something wrong'.  Think it dawns on some people that they were never actually in love with the OH in the first place.

Facebook?? Ffs! People go through this who aren't on Facebook and went through it before Facebook! And anyone who looks at a friends Facebook page and envies it wants a good slap ! And probably shouldn't be married!

RE: the broken marriages I think people give up too easily. They hit upon a rough patch or an argument escalates and they think feck it this isn't worth the hassle. I know of men in Armagh walking away from 4 kids...another lad walked away from 2 young kids and one of them had Down Syndrome.

I don't believe I'm having a mid life crisis the way hollywood would describe it but I've definitely been thinking a lot about life and choices and time.  I think crisis is a negative word. I'm having more of a realization or awakening that life is short, I'm not invincible after all, that time is precious and the people I love deserve more of my time.....

Thankfully my woman is very easy going - though I never went for the high maintenance or daughter of satan type - why would anyone?
She isn't on any social media, she thinks it's the biggest waste of time.  I periodically turn FB off.  I definitely agree it could wreck marriages but more from the standpoint of exes being in touch or old school acquaintances getting a bit flirty and then taking it further.

[Milltown Row2]

I don't think a mid life crisis is all about leaving the wife/husband

Its also about questioning who you are and what have you achieved! Are you stuck in a merrygoround which isnt so merry or in a job that dumbs you down the longer you stay in it. Targets you may have set yourself in your early 20's, have you reached any of them yet?!

The biggest problem is reconnecting with your wife/husband once the kids take themselves off to their rooms once the become teenagers and young adults.. they need you less, only money and lifts and the joint responsiblity of bringing them up has gone and then you both have time for each other, but as anyone who has kids will know that bringing up children is hard work and stress..

This is the period I think were the midlife problems come from, once over that hurdle then you set your targets on different things, saving for retirement, trying to pay house off quicker.. Anyone going through it, evaluate everything

Anyone who leaves their partner after 2 years of marraige never wanted to be married in the first place, or probably didnt have the skills to do it, providing there are no kids involved then that was the best outcome..

Iceman, I know as many women who have ended things than men

[RedHand88]

Stop reading how great some cnut's life is on Facebook and tell your wife to do the same. Their life is as big a pile a ballix as yours. They just don't put that on Facebook.

This is one of the best pieces of advice I could give. Gave up Facebook for this reason. It's all nonsense. All of it.

Hoping the news yesterday is the beginning of the end for it.

[redzone]

Wife always says love you, and I always say I love me too

[general_lee]

I think social media is definitely playing a part in destroying relationships. You're all mentioning Facebook but it's probably the least dangerous. Snapchat, Instagram, dating apps like tinder are all much more lethal. I know fellas with kids and wives/partners and they wouldn't think twice about shagging some randomer behind their back infact some would actively seek it. I'm not the most conservative but there's a lot to be said for maintaining traditional family values

[Milltown Row2]

I think social media is definitely playing a part in destroying relationships. You're all mentioning Facebook but it's probably the least dangerous. Snapchat, Instagram, dating apps like tinder are all much more lethal. I know fellas with kids and wives/partners and they wouldn't think twice about shagging some randomer behind their back infact some would actively seek it. I'm not the most conservative but there's a lot to be said for maintaining traditional family values

So before Facebook/snapchat/tinder it never happened? 

[brokencrossbar1]

What is a mid life crisis?  Some people's mid life crisis is a daily state of being for others. I finalised my divorce there recently at 42 and feel like I have a great future. If anything I feel like I have had a mid life renaissance. It's all about perspective really.

[johnnycool]

I put it down to the decline of the influence of the Catholic Church here in Ireland.

Divorce that is, not a midlife crisis.

When word got round that a marriage was on the rocks the local PP would be dispatched round to the house of said couple where the PP would coerce the poor afflicted wife to stay with the adulterous, alcohol sodden, wife beating brute for the good of the family name or the kids.

[trueblue1234]

I'm 40 in November. Life can be very stressful at times but I wouldn't say I'm having a mid life crisis or anything yet. Marriage is good,work is good, don't have many regrets at all apart from wishing I had lived in a different country for 5 or 6 years, that would have been nice. Spent a year drinking and riding in Australia but that doesn't really count.
How do you know you're having a midlife crisis anyway?

On marriage,It is sad people break-up after a couple of years. The wife's brother and his (ex)wife only lasted 7 months.
I think alot of couples get caught up in the actual wedding itself. Sure some are planning it for a couple of years and it takes over their life. Then it's all over and reality hits home.
It's one thing being boyfriend and girlfriend but being married is a whole different kettle of fish.
I tell the wife everyday how lucky she is to have me, we're married 8 years so I like to think it's working.

What changes though?  Most couples are generally living together anyway and some already have kids.  I agree facebook and the like doesn't help, 'oh look, their life/marriage seems perfect and far better than ours, so there must be something wrong'.  Think it dawns on some people that they were never actually in love with the OH in the first place.

Facebook?? Ffs! People go through this who aren't on Facebook and went through it before Facebook! And anyone who looks at a friends Facebook page and envies it wants a good slap ! And probably shouldn't be married!

RE: the broken marriages I think people give up too easily. They hit upon a rough patch or an argument escalates and they think feck it this isn't worth the hassle. I know of men in Armagh walking away from 4 kids...another lad walked away from 2 young kids and one of them had Down Syndrome.

I don't believe I'm having a mid life crisis the way hollywood would describe it but I've definitely been thinking a lot about life and choices and time.  I think crisis is a negative word. I'm having more of a realization or awakening that life is short, I'm not invincible after all, that time is precious and the people I love deserve more of my time.....

Thankfully my woman is very easy going - though I never went for the high maintenance or daughter of satan type - why would anyone?
She isn't on any social media, she thinks it's the biggest waste of time.  I periodically turn FB off.  I definitely agree it could wreck marriages but more from the standpoint of exes being in touch or old school acquaintances getting a bit flirty and then taking it further.

I think it also worth stating that staying in a loveless/ negative marriage helps no-one, certainly not the kids, so I don't believe in the staying together for the kids sake. Sometimes people realise there is no fixing it and that people have changed and moved apart. Staying together for the sake of it is a recipe for disaster.