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Messages - Onion Bag

GAA Discussion / Re: Gaa lookalikes
November 13, 2013, 10:14:40 AM
Cant see it Sidney, you may try harder
General discussion / Re: Corny One for Friday
October 29, 2013, 09:57:41 AM
Late Night Phone Call To The Vet

A dog lover, whose dog was a female and "in heat', agreed to look after her neighbor`s male dog while the neighbors were on vacation.

She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds, rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together, in obvious pain and unable to disengage, as so frequently happens when dogs mate.

Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late, she called the vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice.

Having explained the problem to him, the vet said,

"Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw.."

"Do you think that will work?" she asked.

"Just worked on me," he replied.
GAA Discussion / Re: Club Manager JOBS
October 26, 2013, 08:05:48 PM
St Paul's, Bessbrook,
Quote from: AZOffaly on October 15, 2013, 02:53:12 PM
It's called democracy muppet. How many club players are there, and how many county players? The tail definitely wags the dog in the GAA, because the money and exposure linked to the county game is so much more than the club game.

Most proposals for restructuring the inter county games seem to centre on having more games, be that champions league type groups or whatever. The obvious implication there is that the club fixtures would have to, again, adapt and accomodate these extra games.

2% of GAA players are county Players
Tyrone / Re: Tyrone Club Football and Hurling
October 09, 2013, 04:34:18 PM
Anyone know when the reserve championship is? where could i get a list of fixtures and venues?
GAA Discussion / Re: Armagh's big news
October 08, 2013, 05:11:48 PM
Armagh for sam 2014
 A bundle of useless bastards that couldnt agree on the the colour of shite, an £18million investment to try and tidy up the maze and they could agree on what they wanted to do with it,
Farmers capture one metre-long 'ratzilla' which terrorised village and ate fish WHOLE

The freakish giant rodent weighed ten times that of an average rat and had been devouring 3kg fish whole in Shaoyang, in China's Hunan Province
Chinese farmers have captured a one metre-long, 5kg rat which had been terrorising villagers, it was claimed today.

The freakish giant rodent, dubbed 'ratzilla', weighed ten times that of an average rat and had been devouring 3kg fish whole in Shaoyang, in China's Hunan Province.

In a gruesome twist, farmers who caught the huge animal tried to cut it up to eat - but broke two knives hacking at its body.

The rat had been terrorising villagers in Shaoyang before local farmers banded together to finally catch it, according to

Workers eventually cornered 'ratzilla' and killed it with makeshift weapons, but broke two knives trying to carve its thick bones and skin.
Rat is widely eaten in Guangdong, southern China, and is used in soups as well as being stewed or braised.

It some parts of China it is considered to be three times more nutritious than chicken.

Just had my shit day cheered up, have 2 tickets sorted for the match  :D
General discussion / Re: Corny One for Friday
September 18, 2013, 09:05:38 PM
Orior, you need your hole kicked for that
Who is the Antrim u21 manager?
Also anyone the back room  team?
General discussion / Re: Corny One for Friday
September 03, 2013, 08:59:13 PM
Hardy, that's a cracker  ;D
Looking a couple of lower tier Hogan stand tickets lads, PM me

GAA Discussion / Re: Athletic Grounds,Armagh.
August 27, 2013, 04:47:11 PM
Them foudations are in for another score board
Any changes to the background team, i see Justin Mc nulty is to leave Laois perhaps there might be an opening there, no disresepct to Peter Mc Donell, Martin Mc Quillan and Brendan Hughes but i think Armagh need a few of 02 lads in help the cause