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10 years ago, I had the finer details of my suicide more or less arranged.  I had it all set up to look like a fishing accident- in my little head, it would make things easier for my parents and siblings.
I can't pinpoint any one reason why I didn't follow through,  nor can I pick something significant that changed things, which is a balls because it could be a very useful help for anyone else in a similar position.
I had gone to one doctor and described some of the things that were happening physically (seizing up in anxiety or panic attacks), behaviour-wise (I was finding it utterly exhausting trying to project a normal disposition at home and in work), and socially (I could handle football training sessions and matches, I actually enjoyed that, but after used every excuse under the sun to avoid having to socialise.  Doubtless some thought I was getting into dairying, there was so many 'cows calving').
The doctor was old school, near retirement.  He more or less dismissed it, telling me not to think so much.  Oh f**ing grand, it that all it was? 
The next lad was far more helpful, couple of good chats, referrals if I wanted, and good practices within a schedule,  and after if there was no change, he'd prescribe medication.  That probably turned the wheel enough.  I still had a fair bit of heavy lifting to do myself, and through reading and drawing my own conclusions, things changed, bit by bit.
I'm so thankful that never in the last 10 years have I ever been as low, and for whatever reasoning,  I don't envisage getting to that stage again.  I still have those days, and wobbles now and then, but unlike back then, now I can react and steady the ship- I can deal with them fully or piecemeal,  but I don't let them accumulate or take me over.
I suppose my point is that the light at the end of the tunnel isn't just a cliche.  It will come, eventually,  no matter what.  You just have to give yourself the chance. There are always means for getting back control,  for getting yourself into the driver's seat in your mind, and not just being an unwilling and frightened passenger in your own mind.
If you happen to be in that spiral,  or going through a tough phase where you don't even feel like yourself,  keep going.  There are ways for everyone,  and you'll find yours. 
If you ever want to hear a bit more or have any questions you want to ask, let us know.  I'm no guru, I'm no professional,  I mightn't have many answers, but I'll try my best.  All I know is I'm here, and life is good.  It's not perfect,  but it's better than being a 10 year old statistic and a headstone.

Great post. And some great advice in there too. Fair play.

A lot of it would be predicated on Texas going blue, which could be a toss-up. Refugees from California's housing crisis keep moving to Austin, a city that has much more liberal building policies than anything you'd find in CA, so they can afford to go there. It just ended a 12-year streak as the country's fastest growing metro area, adding 50,000 residents from 2022 to 2023.

The NPVIC could be at least ten years away from getting done, so I'm not holding my breath for that one.

End of the day, long after Trump is gone nobody gonna trust the US again, once bitten twice shy. Americans find that out in the long run. Nxt Iraq type war, they be going it alone.

Yep, even if things swing back towards sanity in the next couple of elections, who's to say the MAGAts won't be back again after that to throw the whole thing into turmoil again. Other nations will simply not be able to rely on the US going forward.

The following needs to happen:

• Texas needs to turn blue in 2028, followed by the end of voter suppression there so that it can stay blue
• DC statehood
• Puerto Rico statehood
• Supreme Court expanded to compensate for the illegitimate justices put there on Mitch McConnell's watch
• National Popular Vote Interstate Compact enacted to scrap the electoral college (much easier to do after Texas swings blue)
• Voting Rights Act restored

The NPVIC is currently at 209 of the 270 required electoral votes, with legislation pending in 119 EVs' worth of states. Texas would get it to 249.

Corey Booker just did something remarkable. Should raise his profile among Dems who are longing for an Obama-like figure.

What did he achieve apart from raising his profile?

The Democrats need new leadership. There's a deep field to choose from, and Booker has always been a strong candidate. Raising his profile has value. It's not like he's going to single-handedly block everything Trump is trying to do, the Dems just don't have the numbers. The people whining about how he dIdN't dO eNoUgH are the same people who stayed at home when they had a chance to go out and vote for a Democratic President and a Democratic majority in the Senate, so I'm not terribly interested in what they have to say at this point.

That said, meeting with Gallant is not a good look considering how Democratic opinion is turning against Israel.

Speaking of new leadership, there are growing calls for AOC to primary Chuck Schumer and get into the Senate. It'd be a turn-up for the books if she pulled that off. Plenty of Sanderistas would row in behind her if she did.

Corey Booker just did something remarkable. Should raise his profile among Dems who are longing for an Obama-like figure.

This is precisely what Western (pro Zelensky) governments and their media arms are doing isn't it Gerry? These great principled leaders are ALL in on Israel and in the same breath ALL in on Ukraine.
How are you coping with the cognitive dissonance? Must be tough.

We can all agree it's a truly fcked up world and it looks (to my eye anyway) like it's accelerating in what appears to be a pre planned negative direction.

This George Orwell quote resonates
"All tyrannies rule through fraud and force, but once the fraud is exposed they must rely exclusively on force."

Nice try.

So in order to weasel out of your support for fascist Russia but condemnation of fascist Israel you equate me with hypocritical western governments.

I am answerable only to myself. No cognitive dissonance here.

Unlike yourself - crying about Palestinians* but an apologist, propagandist and excuser of attempted Russian genocide of the Ukrainian nation.


*when murdered by Israel only - those murdered by Assad or Hezbollah are of no concern and can be discarded for ideological reasons.

Stop feeding the troll. He's like a gramophone with the needle stuck.

Yeah unlikely, but stranger things have happened.

America's primitive voting system is vulnerable to being hijacked by extremists if people are divided between multiple moderate candidates. Ireland's STV system is not friendly to extremists and favours the centre. I'd be very surprised if McGregor made much headway in a campaign.

Is there a housing crisis?

Of course. But the roots of that are not in immigration. It's got a long list of causes, such as the planning system, the oversized power of the NIMBY lobby (it only takes one person to get a court injunction to block a housing development that would have added hundreds of housing units), etc.. Immigrants are not the cause of that.

Is there an immigration crisis?

Certainly not.  A country like Ireland needs more immigrants, who skew towards working age, to support the growing number of dependents who are now living longer. Occupations like nursing are labour intensive and very hard to automate, so I can't think of any way of filling those roles without immigration.

Is there a healthcare crisis?

Yes, but see above. There are many issues with the way the Irish health system is managed, but it's hard to see how immigrants are at fault for that.

Is there a law and order crisis in certain parts of Ireland?

Local people commit crimes. Immigrants commit crimes. I've yet to see any evidence that immigrants commit crimes at a higher rate than locals. But an immigrant committing a crime will get many more acres of news print and generate far more outrage than a local doing the same or worse.

Is the housing crisis, the healthcare crisis, the law and order crisis caused or exacerbated by immigration?

It's a clever argument that immigrants are putting pressure on the housing market, but there are many factors feeding into it. Local people having children are also increasing demand for housing. Do we blame people for having children? I would argue that local NIMBYs who block construction of new housing are far more culpable in separating housing supply from demand, but it's ultimately the system that empowers them that needs to be reformed.

For healthcare, I would suggest that inept management is the biggest factor, and immigrants who can increase the supply of labour in that sector are part of the solution, not part of the problem.

For crime, the question is a bit loaded in that it presupposes that there is a law and order crisis. Crime comes in many categories, some of which will show increases and some will show decreases. Easily-accessible CSO stats on their website go back to 2003. Homicides seemed to peak in 2007, and haven't shown a discernible increasing trend since. Sexual offences seem to be increasing, but it's hard to know if that's down to increased incidents or increased reporting as people feel more free to speak out about it. It wasn't so long ago that church-run institutions were hell-holes in which today's sex offending stats would probably be dwarfed, but it all went unreported for years. Child abductions seem to be holding steady. Ditto for robberies.

Adjust it all for population and we're probably looking at a steady decrease in crime, which tracks with the rest of the developed world. ... Yup, just checked it. Overall per-capita decrease since 2007. I'd feel pretty confident in saying there is no "law and order crisis," to say nothing of anything we could blame on immigrants.

Support your local shops and family businesses.

Tesla dealership in Belfast attacked with 20 of Space Hitler's shitty cars damaged, oh dear, how sad...

Can't be real surely?

I had a hard time believing it too, but...

https://www.instagram.com/pearlmania500/reel/DHJIce7xw_t/

Fair enough. Though this week I'm more horrified about the administration defying court orders, and also refusing to readmit a Lebanese surgeon on a legitimate work visa, with no reason given.

I read this morning about an ethnic Hmong woman from Milwaukee who has lived in the US since she was a baby (born in Thailand to refugees from the Vietnam War), but after getting mixed up in and serving time for some kind of illegal marijuana  criminality, she lost her green card and was deported straight out of prison to Laos, a country she had never previously set foot in. Leaving behind her US husband and five kids, and with her documents seized by the Laotian government and running out of diabetes medication.

Brought to you by "the party of family values."

"He was a smart guy. You know Tesla. First the light bulb and now this. Seems like a modern-day Isaac Neutron."

"Sleepy Joe" oversaw the biggest stock gains in US history, 9 straight quarters of GDP growth, 12 straight months of inflation decline... and "the greatest businessman ever" crashed it all in 45 days.

Is someone trying to argue that Trump cut taxes? What do these people think a tariff is?