An Unexpected Road

[Gold]

Read it in work at lunch and just thought 'Wow.'

Jaw-droppingly honest. Was thinking as was reading it i hadnt seen u posting in a while.

I reckon all of us would have those feelings should the same happen

But as mentioned by many everyones healthy and you'll only have good from him. A fella down the street from me has it and when you meet him he's never not happy or smiling, instantly putting a smile on your face

[Dinny Breen]

A very courageous post Laoislad.

Thanks for sharing and may you reap the all the rewards and more that parenthood can bring.

[Tony Baloney]

Brilliant post Laoislad. I PMd you a while back to ask if everything was okay and when I hadn't heard back I had a gut feeling that all wasn't well in the background.

You have eloquently put down in writing how every parent in the situation feels. My youngest is 3 and has cerebral palsy, possibly due to complications during pregnancy (of which there were many) or due to a traumatic birth where he had to be resuscitated immediately after birth - we simply don't know and this point I don't care. Regardless of how and why and when we have a little boy that will need our care and attention for the rest of his/our days. That's the long and the short of it and it appears you're already on the road of acceptance, so fair play!

It's tough now and you will shed tears and want to hammer something or someone to relieve the anger - or do as I do and bait people on the gaaboard  . You'll wonder and rage at the mothers who drink and smoke throughout their pregnancy and end up with healthy babies at the end. Ultimately none of that changes the situation, the wee man can't help himself yet so you have to dust yourself off and do what is required.

Our first two years were hellish as the wee fella was having (status) seizures lasting for up to an hour on a regular basis and as these are considered a medical emergency we had to always ring an ambulance and inevitably spend a couple of days in hospital. We were in hospital 9 times in a few weeks at the tail end of 2010! It has got the stage where we now have a VIP Pass to the Children's Ward in Craigavon Hospital, bypassing A&E!

Thankfully the doctors found the right mix of drugs and although the seizures still happen they are considered "normal" epileptic seizures and are easier to manage. Even now though we still plans trips based on the proximity of our destination to a hospital and I've missed a couple of All-Irelands due to poorly timed seizures! The wee fella was over 2 before we could visit my homeplace out in the sticks as it is too far from a hosptial to take the risk even though we travel everywhere with an emergency dose of diazepam!

He's 3 now and a great wee fella. When people mention cerebral palsy you immediately think the worst and the docs told us they couldn't guarantee if he would ever walk or talk.  But he's now flying about the place and loves the craic and takes no buck from his bigger brothers. He can't speak and may never speak which is a huge issue and he will always be way behind due to learning difficulties that are "complex and severe" to quote a report. Having said that you always have to look at the positives and realise that there are people dealing with worse. He will be going to a wee special school soon and there are some kids there that require 24 hour support, assisted breathing etc. We have a lot to be thankful for even if it doesn't feel that way sometimes.

Although the situation alters the future for everyone you have take it from me it gets better! If you ever want a chat give me a shout.

[EC Unique]

A heart warming thread with powerfull posts.

[Square Ball]

don't know what to say that hasn't already been said, a lot of honest and heartfelt posts here and like a few here had a wee tear in my eye.

wishing the three of you all the best

[joemamas]

Laoislad,

One of the most honest pieces of writing I have ever read. I felt compelled to respond.

Your son is very lucky he has parents like you.

My thoughts, hopes and prayers are with you on the road ahead.

[Pangurban]

Raw,searingly honest emotional testimony, that will touch anyone reading it. I applaud the courage Laioslad, My Daughter who works with Children afflicted with Downs Syndrome, has asked me to assure you that the future will not be as bleak as you naturally fear, rather this Child will bring you a lot of joy,love and laughter, and you will surprised how much he will achieve. Sincere best wishes to you, your wife and child. You have found a new cause for living, and from the strenght and power of your testimony here you will be a great asset to any organisation you join to advance your Sons future

[The Iceman]

Brave and very moving post. I can only imagine what you are going through but it is reassuring to see the acceptance you already have of the situation and the responsibility you have already taken by addressing your feelings and trying to deal with them.
I have been blessed to know many young people with Down Syndrome. My Mother was a special needs nurse and has a real gift with children with Downs. As many posters have shared, all my experiences have been amazing with these kids. They really are a testimony to all that is good about our human nature and the love they share is nothing short of magnetic.

We're expecting our third child this May. We found out it will be our 2nd boy and your story has sat with me all day. I waited until later to post. I see our roles as Fathers as the very definition of who we are as men and you have shown in a few sentences on a page the kind of man you are. Eoghan is blessed to have you as a Dad.

[Rois]

Heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.

I don't have children (yet) so can't pretend to understand the strength of your feelings Laoislad, but can only hope that I would be able to face any similar challenges with the same honesty and attitude that you are displaying. 

[Orior]

LaoisLad, you are a credit to your own parents and upbringing. I hope the inner strength you have discovered serves you well, and your wife and wee Eoghan.

[Shamrock Shore]

Laoislad

Fair dues to you. I admire your courage in posting this. I knew of your heartache and I was hoping you would come on and let people know where the lover of all things Laois and Liverpool had gone.

I admire your honesty. I don't often feel tears when I read stuff but your post took me there. Dougal probably nailed it. All children bring all sorts of joys.

As long as he grows up hating Westmeath he'll be grand.

[onefaircounty]

LL great post and totally honest. Congratulations. Children are a blessing and each one is different and I am sure your son will give you much to be proud of. Benny Coulterr paid a lovely tribute to his brother in his column in the Irish News a while back. Worth a read.
God Bless

I believe it was Tierney, a great piece.

As was your piece LL, best of luck, brilliant post. Don't be a stranger to the board even when busy changing nappies!

[Newbridge Exile]

As someone said earlier heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time, , Thasks for the post LL, The most moving and honest post I have ever read

[Harold Disgracey]

Thanks for sharing, as a parent this brought a little tear to my eye.  The very best of luck to the three of you.

[Maiden1]

LL great post and totally honest. Congratulations. Children are a blessing and each one is different and I am sure your son will give you much to be proud of. Benny Coulterr paid a lovely tribute to his brother in his column in the Irish News a while back. Worth a read.
God Bless

I believe it was Tierney, a great piece.

As was your piece LL, best of luck, brilliant post. Don't be a stranger to the board even when busy changing nappies!

Mick O'Connell has spoken many times about the gift of his son Diarmuid.

http://catholichotdish.com/embracing-life/the-greatest-gift-i-was-ever-given/

The best we can hope for any of our children is that they will be happy in whatever path there lives take.