girlfriend - help

[DrinkingHarp]

SO she was over last night, I made an effort i clean the place so you could see the carpet and removed the trademark tyrone facial hair. An she basically said she was feeling crap cause of this and that.... So i shut up and listened, she said it might good to have a break from seeing eachother so we can be happy and look forward to seeing eachother.  Said she feel better that she got it off her chest. So i had a go n said it was crap that were not ridin enof, she agreed So I preceeded to follow mayomans advice, and she seemed pleased with the results. So feeling a bit better about the position were in, and i got back in the saddle and lost the wheelbarrow

Well done young fella, it sounds like things are going swimmingly, bet it was like feeding the horsey when you put the hand down the pants!! Now that you have come this far I'd reccomend over the next week you start demanding blowjobs at random times, make sure to have the bell end well shined, the girls aren't too fond of the cheddard foreskin. When your in the car with her say "any chance of a bit of road head", catch her off guard, tell her you seen it in a film and that its full of protein and great for her skin..... If that doesn't work punch her in the kidney and she'll drop like a sack of spuds......
I can see this relationship lasting, i really can..... 

Has to be the quote of the year!!!!!!

[Longshanks]

Jasis been catching up on this thread as didn't get a chance over the weekend, really making me laugh and glad things are working out, it seems Mayoman is something of a relationship guru!!

[Our Nail Loney]

There should be an ask mayoman thread... People just go in and pose their problems with whatevers happening in their lives

Better than f**king Jeremy Kyle anyway...

[Rav67]

There should be an ask mayoman thread... People just go in and pose their problems with whatevers happening in their lives

Better than f**king Jeremy Kyle anyway...

I'd rather f**k Jeremy Kyle

[Our Nail Loney]

There should be an ask mayoman thread... People just go in and pose their problems with whatevers happening in their lives

Better than f**king Jeremy Kyle anyway...

I'd rather f**k Jeremy Kyle

Even if he looked at you first?!

[youngfella]

ME n herself have split up am gutted. dunno what to do, fancy a binge but have championship next weekend.......

[ziggysego]

Sorry to hear.

[youngfella]

Sorry to hear.
[/quote

thanks mate

[maggie]

Sorry to hear that youngfella-but whatever you do, under no circumstances should you drunken text/dial-been there, done that and got the t-shirt.

Also if things don't work out between Leenie&Ziggy-maybe you could give her a rattle. 

[ziggysego]

Jesus Maggie! Give me a chance with leenie, before you pass her onto someone else. Anyway, why don't you give youngfella a wee rattle so you so lovely put it?

[maggie]

Sorry ziggy-mayoman's vulgarity is obviously rubbing off on me!!!
I did give you and leenie a chance-i said if it didnt work out between youse.


Yea, sure, youngfella we can go out and drown your sorrows if you are up for it!!