Depression

Started by Eamonnca1, October 25, 2013, 09:11:55 PM

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charlieTully

http://www.lifelinehelpline.info/

a useful helpline number for anyone with low mood or thoughts of suicide.

stew

I have been on sertraline for a year and it has helped, suicide was and will never be an option but I was at the point that I felt I did not care if I was alive or dead, epilepsy haunts me, impacts my life and it got me down, I quit two great jobs because I could no longer drive.

Money was aplenty, no problems there right up until the point I started having seizures for the first time in 15 years, it took me a good six months to realize money is really not that important, family is.
Armagh, the one true love of a mans life.

andoireabu

A mate of mine suffered during our time at uni.  He was in a pretty intense course and seemed to be working every waking moment.  He never got any of the social life we had and went through a bad break up on top of it.  He never mentioned feeling down or anything but we found out that the doctor had put him on anti depressants.  After a while they didn't seem to make any difference and there was no change in his daily life.  Just all work and no play.  He went for a rope one night and thankfully it broke before he could do any harm.  We never brought it up to him but kept a closer eye on his general mood. A couple of years after we were talking a bit about a suicide in the area and he got very quiet.  I kinda steered the chat to that night and waited for him to say something but all he wanted was for me to say it so that he knew we knew without having to say it himself.  I think the problem he had was that he didn't want to confide in the people closest to him because of our age and because nobody else was having the same problems he was having.  Even as his mates we didn't really know how to help because you don't know if he wants to talk about it or have you keep asking, "are you alright?", all the time.  Even now a couple of years after we aren't sure if it's something that still bothers him or if he is on the right side of it. 

For the lads on here who have had experience of it, is it something you would want your friends asking about or would it be better to wait until the person brings it up themselves?
Private Cowboy: Don't shit me, man!
Private Joker: I wouldn't shit you. You're my favorite turd!

stew

Please get him to talk about it, preferably to a counselor or if not his mates, he needs to express it, that is awful and I wish him nothing but the best.
Armagh, the one true love of a mans life.

Milltown Row2

Most posters would know of someone who suffers from it or has in the past, terrible illness to deal with, not just for the sufferer but for family and friends also.

Trying to deal with someone with it is really difficult, as for most parts the person is the life and soul of the party and during that you are wondering whats all the fuss, but when they feel that dark dark cloud surrounding them and they get a sense of worthlessness then they become a different person and reasoning with them becomes impossible. It could have been a change to their routine or a getting bad news combined with a crap day at work that could set it of, even missing a session with the club or gym.

Not enough being done (imo) on mental health issues, a lot of unanswered questions. Below is some stats on suicide, scary reading

This year's report shows:
In the UK, the highest suicide rate per 100,000 for males, females and for all persons was in Scotland.
Male suicide rates are on average 3-5 times higher than female rates and men aged 30-44 are the group with the highest rate.
In the ROI men are also the group with the highest suicide rate, it is approximately 5 times that of females, and highest for men aged 45-49.


1 million people across the globe die by suicide each year. That's one suicide every 40 seconds.
More people die by suicide each year than by murder and war combined.
It's estimated that approximately 5% of people attempt suicide at least once in their life.
Between 10% and 14% of the general population have suicidal thinking throughout their lifetime.
Suicide is the second biggest cause of death worldwide among 15-19 year olds.
100,000 adolescents die by suicide every year.
Suicide is estimated to be under-reported for reasons of stigma, religion and social attitudes. Many suicides are hidden among other causes of death, such as road traffic accidents and drowning.
None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an after thought. Ea

BartSimpson

Well done and very brave. Not many talk about it and thousands more should. I know a few people with a similar type of depression as what you describe EamonM, and God knows theres several different types.

Have you tried a Seasonal adjustment light for the house you live in? I know when winter comes, some of them get very dpwn, until they start to use the light, and that gives them enough to see them through the dark days.

Another great crowd who can help and have a big link with the Dubs is Pieta house www.pieta.ie and I know a few peiple who use them. All volunteers too. Top people.

Best wishes to all here who are in dark times. there is hope
guwan the parish

muppet

Quote from: BartSimpson on October 26, 2013, 08:53:56 PM
Well done and very brave. Not many talk about it and thousands more should. I know a few people with a similar type of depression as what you describe EamonM, and God knows theres several different types.

Have you tried a Seasonal adjustment light for the house you live in? I know when winter comes, some of them get very dpwn, until they start to use the light, and that gives them enough to see them through the dark days.

Another great crowd who can help and have a big link with the Dubs is Pieta house www.pieta.ie and I know a few peiple who use them. All volunteers too. Top people.

Best wishes to all here who are in dark times. there is hope

Good call, maybe we could do something for them charity-wise again?

A run?
A cycle?
A 5-aside soccer tournament?
A golf outing?

Something else?
MWWSI 2017

brokencrossbar1

Eamon I often disagree with your viewpoints(and I will again and that is for certain!) but I admire you for putting your story out there.  In many ways you are very lucky in that you recognise what you need to do and you have developed coping mechanisms.  Depression is an illness which has struck my family terribly.  In 2 weeks time it will be the first anniversary of my mum's passing and it is pretty tough for me at the minute.  If you have never been in the maelstrom of what goes on in the life of someone suffering from depression then it is very hard to understand why they keep the curtains closed, why they don't leave the house, why they feel their guts turn whenever they are faced with having a simple conversation with someone who simply asks ' well, how's things?'.  How often do we ask that question and receive the answer, 'ah well things are grand' or 'ah well they could be worse'.    The worst answer is 'Fine'.  Generally it is clear that things are not fine but the person simply does not know (or does not want to know) what to say.  It sickens me when you ask someone how they are and they fill you full of a litany of illnesses, stresses and shite to be honest about how tough their life is.   They day they refuse to answer the door or the phone or even refuse to get dressed because they cannot face the world is the day they get my sympathy. 

In Ireland we have a horrendous illness which is not full being fought and the more support we can give to the likes of Pieta House and AWARE and PIPS the better it will be for our future.

Quote from: muppet on October 26, 2013, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: BartSimpson on October 26, 2013, 08:53:56 PM
Well done and very brave. Not many talk about it and thousands more should. I know a few people with a similar type of depression as what you describe EamonM, and God knows theres several different types.

Have you tried a Seasonal adjustment light for the house you live in? I know when winter comes, some of them get very dpwn, until they start to use the light, and that gives them enough to see them through the dark days.

Another great crowd who can help and have a big link with the Dubs is Pieta house www.pieta.ie and I know a few peiple who use them. All volunteers too. Top people.

Best wishes to all here who are in dark times. there is hope

Good call, maybe we could do something for them charity-wise again?

A run?
A cycle?
A 5-aside soccer tournament?
A golf outing?

Something else?


A 7 aside GAA tournament?

muppet

Quote from: Count 10 on October 26, 2013, 09:17:37 PM
From 2004 until present time I went looking for somewhere to end it all....trees etc I was diagnosed with a relatively simple complaint but I could see no light at the end of the tunnel....I survived.....then was diagnosed with cancer in April.....felt like calling it a day...but couldn't ......have had 12 doses of chemo and await a scan to see how things have progressed.....I have felt very close to ending it all.....but I can't I'm a coward.

Seek help it is the only way out!

Jesus man that is tough going but fair play, stick at it.
MWWSI 2017

mouview

Quote from: Count 10 on October 26, 2013, 09:17:37 PM
From 2004 until present time I went looking for somewhere to end it all....trees etc I was diagnosed with a relatively simple complaint but I could see no light at the end of the tunnel....I survived.....then was diagnosed with cancer in April.....felt like calling it a day...but couldn't ......have had 12 doses of chemo and await a scan to see how things have progressed.....I have felt very close to ending it all.....but I can't I'm a coward.

Seek help it is the only way out!

No, you're courageous for keeping going and not giving up.

thebandit

Fair play to you lads... It's a very brave thing to speak out, and 'normalising' the condition is so important given the events of this week.

I've been told in the past that I have SAD, basically that the winter can be tough to get through. But I'd feel more pissed off that depressed.

In any case, it's important to make an effort to help people, I lost a cousin to suicide, and even though he was a good bit older than me (he was 29, I was 13), I'll always regret not doing the 'small things' and encouraging others to do the same. It can be know what to say, but 5 minutes of conversation can make a difference in anyone's day.

FL/MAYO

Interesting article in CNN
Could you be almost depressed?

http://cnn.it/1ePsu5U

SLIGONIAN

A close friend of mine same age as me committed suicide 4 weeks ago, he was jobless and no girlfriend and saw no way out, because i am abroad working i haven't seen him in 1 yr and in that time i was told he was not himself, this devastated me and i cannot comprehend how his family felt or still feel,

i believe not talking about suicide and depression is the biggest mistake out there, when people die from suicide its not stated most of time through fear of more etc... but that to me is wrong, people with depression suffer a huge amount of shame because of the way society views it, and within their communities they get isolated because of this shame and guilt, by not talking about it or trying to cover up suicide what message does that send to someone who is depressed,

Respect to eamonn for starting this thread and count10 for both there courage, i would say count you are not a coward, you just don't have it in you to give up,

Up until the age of 23 i can say i never really had anything too bad happen, but then wham my dad has a heart attack, best friend gets cancer and brother in a serious car accident all in the same month, i am emotional centre of my family so everyone looked at me for support but i went in breakdown, all the above survived but the shock of that was too much for me as i am sensitive soul, having emotional support everyone was too much, at work it was hard to hide the pain and eventually illnesses appeared in me, ulcers, balance disorders, nausea, headaches, i remember the week after dad had the heart attack i was so sick i had to be sedated, and carried to the car, from then i had 6 yrs of illnesses, many of family questioned the reality of them and that was tough for me to bear, doctors sent me to pyschcharist who said i am fine, whats going on with is something more than just mental, i did loads of alternative therapies, to find cures, i had to give up work for a 1yr because 1 illness took all my energy, i could bearly move, during this time i did get depressed but refused medication and went down the spiritual path looking for answers, i received no support from family or friends, in fact some friends abundoned me and my family hadn't a  clue what i was going through and used to make things worse, by saying its all your head, get a job etc...eventually with the energy loss they found i had a rare virus which has no cure, what to do then? at that time i had read enough about the ego to dissolve some of my expectations of how life should be but  was definitely in a depressed state, i kept doing alternative therapies and i was searching for a cure, eventually i came across Neuro Linguistic programming technique called lightning process, it was in london and by this time i had job offer in dubai, i still had no energy so i borrowed money of a cousin who is a close friend and this was my last chance before the job started, it worked, what it does is amazing, it basically rewires your brain using thoughts and action to  release endorphins and stop adrenaline pumping, i had my energy back and went to dubai, still this chapter wasn't closed, i was realising though that i was beginning to awake to something, i was aware of myself the ego and learning about conscious and unconscious behavioural patterns of my own, in dubai i started to get vasovagal attacks and IBS, and it once happened on a flight which was the scariest thing every, what used to happen was my body would just suddenly shut down and circulation would stop and i would go into shock, and be rushed to hospital, this happened about 9/10 times over 2 yrs and i couldn't understand why or how to stop it, one day i was listening to the car radio and this guy was describing exactly what i was going through, and he read a book, the book was claire weeks, self help for your nerves, basically what happened me was through all the illnesses my awareness and sensitivity of the body made me over sensitive to sensations and my body was overreacting unconsciously, believe it or that book cured me, you can reverse everything, along the way of all the above i did get diagnosed with genetic disorder which is the main reason i didn't make it a football, through having no patella on either leg, i was also able to handle my dads cancer which he survived because of all the knowledge and experience and tools i went through during those yrs, i also met a native american medicine woman who takes on apprentices and puts them through ceremonies of native american traditions which is life enhancing to say the least and i met amazing people along the way..one other thing is one guy who is astrologer and did a reading on my birth chart, which basically is the minute your born and where you were and that, he basically validated  everything i went through, i barely spoke and he had everything about all the illnesses and why i had to go through them, and there was a reason, and actually through all that suffering i started to see vibrations of energy around people and light  and have these gifts of healing myself which i have helped others and this is why i am in georgia to make a quick buck and then i am going to change my career and going to train in NLP and become a practitioner, the suffering had a purpose and i saw the signs and there is so much more to this life than meets the eye, i had some strange experiences and see things you would have to see to be believed and everyones story is different, but i would say this, i wouldn't treat depression with medication, i honestly believe our neuro pathways get entangled and toxic and once there untangled and your thought how to release endorphins you come back into balance. i know eamonn stated his coping measures but i would say do what you feel you need to do at this moment, but do consider NLP aswell which they teach to use the tools yourself and then you won't need to cope and can just live in balance instead.

3 books hat helped me most where eckhart toll power of nw, jeff foster deepest acceptance and tibetan book od the living and death..
"hard work will always beat talent if talent doesn't work"

Asal Mor

AA have a lot of slogans but my favorite is "This too shall pass". No matter what sh!tty situation you're in or how awful you feel, it will pass if you just hang in there.

I think it helps to remove the stigma if the family and newspapers actually talk openly about it as suicide rather than the "he was found dead at his home" stuff, when everyone knows what happens. That just sends the message that there is something shameful about suicide when there isn't. It's just a tragedy.

Milltown Row2

Fair play to the lads that are brave enough to tell their stories. Must be like a rollercoaster at times. All different coping methods it seems and as long as they work for you then brilliant. Keep up the fight
None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an after thought. Ea