An Unexpected Road

[TacadoirArdMhacha]

Had realised you hadn't been posting Laoislad and thats probably an indication of the esteem in which you are held on here as there'd be few enough who I'd realise were missing. I can't pretend to be able to empathise with your situation but I wish you, your wife and Eoghan all the best for the future. Its very clear from that post that you have the strength for the challenge.

[Orangemac]

Fair play to you Laoislad, it took real courage to write this.

Our eldest daughter was diagnosed with autism when she was 4. We had suspected it but it was still a shock to receive the news.
Once the initial shock wears off, as you say you have to man up. Things will get easier, especially with each others and your families support.

Despite the difficult road that lies ahead, Eoghan is your child and you will do anything for him at the end of the day.

Wishing the 3 of you all the best.

[02]

Your heartfelt account really does put the trival things that people worry about into perspective. I believe that emotional intelligence is the best gift that a parent can provide to a child and you have that quality in abundance. Your son will have the opportunity to live his life without having to conform to all of the societal pressures which causes so much stress to so many, to become the person who he really is - now that is truly liberating.

[give her dixie]

Once in a blue moon along comes a post that needs to be re read in order to fully take in the joy, honesty, heartbreak, and hope that you so beautifully put into words. You are some man LL, and what a father you will make.

On this board we all argue now and again, fall out once in a while, however, when we read a post like that, we can all gel together and be as one.

There will be a few tough days for you in the time ahead, but hey, there will be more bright days than dark ones, and these are the ones that you will remember and treasure forever.

[DrinkingHarp]

First, let me congratulate you on becoming a father!!!

Second, your son has some great parents who will love him and receive that love right back.

Third, I think its time to change the name from LaoisLad to LaoisMan. It takes a man to open up and offer up their thoughts like you have done. From as much as you can know someone from an internet board and fb from the past couple of years, I can see your progression from one of lads to the man you are now who looks back at you in the mirror. Your son is in great hands and with the love and support from your post any child regardless of their difficulties is lucky to have you as his father.

[JUst retired]

LL after reading and rereading your post I know it took some courage to open your heart like this. We sit at the keyboard and argue and fight ,and occasionaly rag each other. But we see what is really important in life. There is a song written and sung by a girl from Galway i think, it is all about autisim. It is written from inside the mind of the child. I dont have it to hand but I will get the details tonight and post the info here. I  know it is a different problem,but the thoughts are the same.
Your post is so heartfelt and should receive a wider audience. Perhaps some of the reporters who troll these forums could take this to a wider audience,instead of all the negative stuff they lift. Good luck to you and your wife and wee son. I hope the future is so bright for you all.

[downredblack]

With a farther like you to help and support him Eóghan will do rightly . The very best to you and your family .

[cicfada]

Inspiring stuff LL! Congrats on the birth of your boy and Thank  You for putting into words  beautifully how  you feel! As much as you know those words have helped yourself, they also will   help others who are/will be in this situation. Might I recommend that you make yourself available for advice for anyone seeking it as you have shown maturity in spades. As a father of 3 healthy young lads myself I from time to time  thank  the man above for those blessings and your post there is confirmation of that fact. Fair plé dhuit a mhac agus go néirí an t-ádh libh!!!!

[quit yo jibbajabba]

Wow.  What an honest post.  Dont post too often nowadays, but couldnt let this one pass; fair play to you chap for your honesty and having the courage to post this.  Special mention to others (HiMucker, Tony Baloney and more) for sharing stuff also.

A powerful post, and a powerful thread. Some good people post on here, though some dont always show it lol. 

As good a post/thread as ive saw on here, all the best for the future LL,     

[stephenite]

Congratulations on the birth of your son, that's a powerful piece you've written.

The fact that you mention that your wife has been your rock and you are now even closer speaks volumes to me about you both as parents the love LLL (Little Laois Lad) will have from you both. I'm not sure there's a better start any child can have once they have that.

[omagh_gael]

First of all congratulations on the birth of your son LL, well done.

Secondly, fair play to you for the courage, honesty and eloquence you displayed by putting together that post. I only seen it this morning when I came into work and to be honest it took me a good hour to gather myself together to actually do some work it hit me that hard. You have shown more balls than all the men on this board put together. Inspirational stuff.

I have worked in learning disability services for over 5 years now and have met a lot of children and adults with Down Syndrome over the years. I am not going to beat around the bush; there will be a huge amount of challenges for you and your wife to confront over the years. However, (and I say this with complete honesty) the world your son will grow up in is a vastly different place than the one he would have grown up in 20 years ago. A lot of the people with DS that I support live amazing lives. I could give you examples of guys with twice the social life I live, people who can stand up on a stage and lecture hundreds of health care professionals on how best to support them and have them eating out of their hands, guys playing 5 a side football with the same vigor (I'm talking proper slide tackles, aggression and celebrations) that you would see down in the local park on a Saturday.

I once supported a guy in West Belfast who was a huge Glentoran fan. He gave me the scare of my life when he insisted that he wear his jersey down to the PD club in Andytown to play a game of pool, you want to see the looks we got! I happened to bump into the same fella on the Crumlin road the other week, he works part time along with a delivery driver for a local chippy. Of course he is not going to make it as an orthopedic surgeon but he was making a real contribution to his local community and is really appreciated by those who were chatting to him. The most important thing was he was happy and he was making others happy. TBH I'm not sure if many people out there without a learning disability are making such an impact on other people's lives than this man was.

Once again, fair fcuks to you for penning that post. I can assure you I will be directing people to it in the future. The part about the guilt/anger you felt at the start is profound, it is so common yet parents find it incredibility difficult to articulate.

Good luck and all the best to the three of you in the future.

[Rossfan]

Fair play to you Laois lad and my very best wishes to ye all for the future.

[magpie seanie]

As someone who has become a parent in the last year a lot of what you posted really resonated with me.  I sincerely wish you good luck with everything and with the guts you've displayed thus far, I'm sure you will get through the tough times, which I hope are few and savour the good times, which I know will be many.

[glens abu]

Fantastic post LL .Good luck.

[Croí na hÉireann]

Don't get the opportunity much these days to look in here but when I saw that post from yourself and the fact you were MIA for a while I knew something was up. Fair play on such an honest post and best of luck in the future. When he starts smiling and giggling back at you, your heart will melt and all will be right with the world.