Things that make you go What the F**k?

[armaghniac]

Darwin award auditions

This guy was filling the yoke with petrol and spotted a spider and figured he'd give the spider a bit of heat with his lighter.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DKrmvM-3hzw

and if heading off on a plane why not put your iphone in a case that looks like a gun?
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/airport-security-alert-ground-flights-6490808

[lawnseed]

jiggers!! jiggered!! ffs...  never saw the like before..
hence the term "jiggered" meaning fukd or broken or injured. well google jiggers and you'll learn more.

[MoChara]

Hardly any need for the racial insults lads.

racial?

I'm guessing he's talking about the Pikey comments.

[StGallsGAA]

Hardly any need for the racial insults lads.

racial?

I'm guessing he's talking about the Pikey comments.

Sadly typical comments that get aimed at anyone from the travelling community who becomes involved in sports. 

[theskull1]

Asian cold caller looking to speak to my missus just told me to f*** off after I asked him for information about the purpose of the call

Result

[macdanger2]

Not sure where to put this one   

http://time.com/4056477/jon-hendren-defends-edward-scissorhands-not-edward-snowden/

HLN anchor seemingly unaware Twitter comedian @fart is trolling her in conversation about Edward Snowden
She was either really professional or really oblivious as Jon Hendren discussed "Edward Scissorhands" at length

On Wednesday, HLN invited Twitter comedian Jon Hendren — whose social media handle, @fart, should have given away the game — to discuss the sudden appearance of Edward Snowden on Twitter yesterday.

HLN anchor Yasmin Vossoughian asked whether Hendren agreed with GOP presidential candidate George Pataki, who wrote that "Twitter is a great company that should not give a platform to terrorists of traiters," to which Hendren replied that Snowden is "a hero doing what any one of us should have done in that situation."

"Some people don't think he's a hero," Vossoughian said.

"Well, they're wrong," Hendren replied. "He's doing the most patriotic possible thing."

Vossoughian then played a clip of John Oliver's interview with Snowden, in which he questioned whether some of the information revealed in Snowden's leaks didn't directly put American lives or operations in harm's way.

"Could he have hurt someone?" Vossoughian asked.

"Well, you know to say he couldn't harm someone," Hendren replied, seemingly on topic. "Absolutely he could. But I think to cast him out, to make him invalid in society, simply because he has scissors for hands — I mean that's strange. People didn't get scared until he started sculpting shrubs into dinosaur shapes and what-not."

Vossoughian was either unfazed or oblivious, as she then asked Hendren about whether Snowden deserved to live in exile in Russia.

"Casting him out is just completely wrong," he replied. "We're treating him like an animal, like someone who should be quarantined and put away. Just because he was created on top of a mountain by Vincent Price, incomplete with scissors for hand and no heart. Edward Scissorhands is a complete hero to me."

"I mean, where else is he going to go? You know?" Hendren asked. "We cast him out. We got scared when he poked a hole in a waterbed with his scissor fingers, and that was unreasonable of us."

[MoChara]

Chris Brown wants to raise domestic violence awareness in Australia

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/chris-brown-wants-to-raise-domestic-violence-awareness-in-australia/

[Bingo]

Coming home for Berlin the other day and a german woman in her 50's was in front of me at security, put her case through and she got pulled over to open the case.

She had feck all clothes in it but a a load of food and other stuff all wrapped up in newspaper. One of the first items the security man lifted from the case was pair of Hedge Shears.

WTF was she thinking and where was she going with them. She was travelling with a younger man, her son, who was kinda unsurprised either when he seen them. Wish I had some german to understand what they where saying.

[muppet]

They were coming over for an Ed Sheerin concert?

Or maybe to sort out @woolberto.

[Orior]

Has Renee Zellweger had surgery? Apparently not

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/10/22/renee-zellweger-changing-face-surgery-pictures_n_6026912.html

[Tony Baloney]

With the latest technology available should cash machines not be getting quicker?!  They all seem desperately slow with umpteen requests to balance views, receipts etc.

[muppet]

With the latest technology available should cash machines not be getting quicker?!  They all seem desperately slow with umpteen requests to balance views, receipts etc.

My favourite is 'Please take your card if you have not already done so'.

[Tony Baloney]

With the latest technology available should cash machines not be getting quicker?!  They all seem desperately slow with umpteen requests to balance views, receipts etc.

My favourite is 'Please take your card if you have not already done so'.

[Puckoon]

With the latest technology available should cash machines not be getting quicker?!  They all seem desperately slow with umpteen requests to balance views, receipts etc.

Huge industry behind card function and security. During the Greek crisis while people were queuing to get their money out - the banks were employing their contractors to slow down the service at the ATMs. Wouldn't be surprised if they are just scared you are going to take your hedge fund out for the weekend and are giving you a few extra seconds to re-consider!

[armaghniac]

With the latest technology available should cash machines not be getting quicker?!  They all seem desperately slow with umpteen requests to balance views, receipts etc.

The one that gets me is  when they only have €50s and you ask for €80 or €120 and it comes back and tells you to choose something else. If it knew it only had €50s why the **** didn't it tell you that at the beginning?